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12-16-2008, 09:17 AM | #1 | |||
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Young Senior Elder Member
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From Annie's Mailbox (used to be Ann Landers.)
Dear Annie, Yesterday, my wife and I were called to our son's school to talk to the crisis prevention officer. We were told our 16 yr. old son had attempted suicide. You can imagine our shock. Where were the signs, the clues? We have a high honors achieving son, an athlete with friends, a Boy Scout and a member of the National Honor Society. He's all a parent could hope for. There have been no arguments, no rebellion, no drugs, or alcohol, no staying out or running away, no complaints about school or home. I'm involved in his life, attend his athletic events and am his scoutmaster. While he is not exactly verbose, we do talk. There was a recent breakup with his first girl-friend, and that apparently was the trigger. When I talked to him about the breakup, he said, "I'm OK. We're still friends." But the continued contact between them was more than he could handle. He needs to learn how to cope with emotional loss because it's bound to happen in some form again. Many parents sit in judgement, saying, "How could they not know?" All I can tell them is that some kids hide it very well. My son is now in secure treatment. We'll have consultations and together find a way to rebuild trust and communication. What I would ask of anyone, but especially teens, is this: If you hear, read or know about someone who is talking about suicide, tell someone responsible. You're not ratting out a friend. You're answering their cries for help and you might just save a life. To parents out there: There can never be too much communication. Dad
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12-18-2008, 01:35 AM | #2 | |||
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'Thanks' Button Team Community Member T.K.S.
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*sigh...
his name was keith...he was a grade above me. he sat at the same chair/desk a period ahead of me. my very best friend at the time and I found his writings one day on the desk... It stated, "I Keith ***** will kill myself today by shooting myself..." my friend and I looked at each other and chuckled...yeah, sure, we thought to ourselves... Keith was very popular, hung out with a popular crowd and was a tall handsome guy and quite a lady's man... We were probably a bit jealous of him...well, we were.... we didn't know him well, and we thought to ourselves, man, this guy has everything...this is just that he was bored or he just wanted some attention... I remember we were actually a bit peeved at him...like, what else could he want?? and our math teacher was boring, ya know? So maybe he was just bored so he decided to write those things to pass time... we scoffed at it even made jokes about it.... the next day...when we walked into the hallway of school, we saw people were crying and holding each other... I swallowed heavy as did my friend, I am sure of... we found out that he did kill himself...just like he stated, he shot himself... I looked at my friend and he looked at me.. the rest of the day was blank... the desk was not there anymore when we went to class later on that day... from what I know, his mom refused to talk about it and probably didn't til the day she died... wished this article was around then, wished we knew what to do back then.... if I can only turn back the clock.... rest in peace, Keith...I am so sorry I didn't say anything....
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Alffe (12-18-2008), da duck (12-18-2008), Mark56 (01-28-2014), mistiis (12-18-2008), Nik-key (12-18-2008), Spanish Moss (12-21-2008), Twinkletoes (12-18-2008) |
12-18-2008, 02:09 PM | #3 | |||
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Senior Member
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....((who moi)) such a painful experience...I am so sorry. We are working at it. We will make a difference....We are making a difference...
(((Keith)))...and ((all those)) who have made such a choice. We all make choices. Sometimes we don't make such good ones. And other people pay a price. But it is not their fault. COMMUNICATION is key! We need to teach communication skills from the very beginning. How to communicate feelings in a healthy way..... ~sigh
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LOVE IS ALWAYS THE ANSWER........ . "Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?" Thoreau ~ You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving. ~ |
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12-18-2008, 03:47 PM | #4 | |||
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Senior Member
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((Moi))
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******************************************** More Than One Soul Dies In A Suicide . ******************************************** . |
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12-21-2008, 09:00 AM | #5 | |||
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Young Senior Elder Member
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Dear Annie,
Today I mourn the loss of a dear friend. She was vibrant, energetic and full of life, but on a crisp autumn afternoon, she committed suicide. She was only 35 and left behind two beautiful little girls. My friend spent her life inspiring other women to get fit by opening her own women's fitness center. I do not know what transpired in the final hours of her life, but I do know she had been under a tremendous amount of stress. I have been in the health care profession for many years and am ashamed to say I missed the warning signs. I cannot change what has happened to my friend, but I can make other people more aware of the prevalence of depression. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, major depressive disorders affect 14.8 million American adults in any given year and depression is more prevalent in women. The median age is 32. Depression knows no boundaries. It does not discriminate against sex, race, age or profession. There is a profound sense of emptiness in the families and friends left behind when a loved one commits suicide. I ask your readers to take the time to really listen to others and be aware of the warning signs of depression. Do not assume everything will work itself out. Most importantly, tell the people you love how much they mean to you. Life is so short. Don't wait until it is too late. I did not get to say goodbye to my friend or tell her what a wonderful person she was, but her spirit will live on in the lives of all the women she inspired. signed...Michelle in Greensboro, N.C. http://www.save.org/index.cfm?fuseac...2DC6B57AF18483
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Mark56 (01-28-2014), mistiis (12-21-2008), Spanish Moss (12-21-2008), Twinkletoes (12-21-2008), who moi (12-21-2008) |
12-21-2008, 10:32 AM | #6 | |||
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Senior Member
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This, I understand...I broke down and cried....when, oh when, will we find the words?????? When will we feel safe to reach out in our emptiness???? When everything looks alright, but it is not....
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LOVE IS ALWAYS THE ANSWER........ . "Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?" Thoreau ~ You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving. ~ |
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12-21-2008, 10:42 AM | #7 | |||
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Young Senior Elder Member
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Oh we hear you dear friend...we just don't know how to make it go away other then to tell you to keep on, keeping on. You are so loved and such a bright light in our lives.
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12-21-2008, 10:57 AM | #8 | |||
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Senior Member
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(((Alffe))) I wouldn't be here without you...and everyone else here... And His strength...which shines through everyone of you....luv u
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LOVE IS ALWAYS THE ANSWER........ . "Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?" Thoreau ~ You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving. ~ |
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12-21-2008, 03:02 PM | #9 | |||
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Young Senior Elder Member
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http://www.karentaylorgood.com/audio...aylor-Good.mp3
"PRECIOUS CHILD" Words and Music by Karen Taylor-Good In my dreams, you are alive and well Precious child, precious child In my mind, I see you clear as a bell Precious child, precious child In my soul, there is a hole That can never be filled But in my heart, there is hope 'Cause you are with me still In my heart, you live on Always there never gone Precious child, you left too soon Tho' it may be true that we're apart You will live forever... in my heart In my plans, I was the first to leave Precious child, precious child But in this world, I was left here to grieve Precious child, my precious child In my soul, there is a hole That can never be filled But in my heart there is hope And you are with me still In my heart you live on Always there, never gone Precious child, you left too soon, Tho' it may be true that we're apart You will live forever... in my heart God knows I want to hold you, See you, touch you And maybe there's a heaven And someday I will again Please know you are not forgotten until then In my heart you live on Always there never gone Precious child, you left too soon Tho' it may be true that we're apart You will live forever... in my heart I'm still looking for that article about abuse but have found so many other things that I'd misplaced....we can't have a forum without Precious Child. And I found a lovely note from XIE...Cris...are you still reading here?.. And Koala...(Anne) wait until you see what I found!! *grin
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12-21-2008, 03:50 PM | #10 | |||
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Senior Member
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.....*lots of tears here...I wish you could hear the music that is playing through my speakers...I don't know how it happened...but, "My Heavely Father" a beautiful primary song. The Prayer with Josh Groban, and Charlotte Church...so beautiful...I think their are angels in my computer....LOL...I got to find a hankie....
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LOVE IS ALWAYS THE ANSWER........ . "Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?" Thoreau ~ You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving. ~ |
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