Guidelines for Holidays And Special Days

1. Tell your family and friends what you need and what isn't helpful. You may want to be with people, but you also may want to be alone.

2. Change your traditions. Think of taking a trip to be away.

3. Simplify. Stop writing Christmas cards, for exmple.

4. Do something for someone else in the name of the person who died. Take presents to a children's hospital or volunteer for a soup kitchen.

5. Do something special for yourself. Stay in bed all day and read a good book: go to a movie.

6. Give yourself permission to grieve. Take time out when the wave of grief comes over you.

7. Know it's ok to laugh again.

8. Know that you're not alone.

9. Let your holidays and special days be filled with grace.


Iris M. Bolton, The Link Counseling Center, Atlanta, Georgia.