Lordy Ms. Alffe, you got THAT right! After watching what my mom and dad go through, I'm worried about my golden years.

Reminds me of a story a professor just told me about this week when he was in Denmark and dramatically started to lose vision in both his eyes due to something wrong with his retinas. He was in the hospital (this was years ago) and told them I don't have any insurance here. After several surgeries and a lengthy stay in the hospital, it ended up costing him nothing.

He said the care he received was second to none and the hospital was very pleasant.

Did I tell you when mom was in the nursing home...well, I knew eventually when you land in one of those you basically lose everything. Medicare would pay for only 21 days there. Aye aye aye!

No, no, no.... What I just heard is simply crazy...

Im so ******....

I was chatting with dad and mom and suddenly, my dad says something like:

"Only crazy people want to commit suicide"

I was so mad I could only open my eyes ! I have told him several times I want to die... So, option a), he thinks Im kidding when I say I want to die , or, option b) he thinks Im crazy...



That prooves dad doesnt have a clue about what I feel...

Gosh, I'm sorry Blue. I can soooo relate to that. I've heard it soooo many times too. And from close family as well. It hurts when people just don't 'get' it. I know. It's a tough thing to deal with. But, you are tough my dear. Hang in there. YOU ARE NOT CRAZY!! I can promise you that. And we can get past those thoughts, it's just harder for us, for some odd reason, that simply hasn't been figured out yet. And people are afraid of what they don't understand, and can't explain. luv u friend....

I so love you too my dear friend !!!

It ticks me off that my family is having a party and only mom and I were not invited....

How cruel is that ?

I'm sorry for Barb, but don't let your "tick off" linger. Negative emotions hurt only the vessel that contains them, not the person/object at which they are directed. You've been hurt enough. The baby Lynleigh is darling, and if you can babysit, your level of functioning is one I would stive for if I had the energy. Your functioning is a blessing. I feel paralyzed and don't know why. I guess that you are not all that you want to be but you are so much more than many, I would surmise. billie bluecat