Jen if you don't want to tell your family, or take yourself to the hospital, please call a hotline....http://suicidehotlines.com/wisconsin.html

I don't know where you live in Wisc. but I know that state has excellent services for suicide prevention and support. Please call...no one need know. Also, click on my signature and read it also. :hug:

Jen29

Do me a favour.......................................hear this song and if possible watch the film.......[i promise we will talk again]


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARk86oIHlLc


WE CAN GET THROUGH THIS TIME:hug:


David:hug:

Thanks for that, I love that movie, it's really sad but good. Speaking of angels. My grandmother died 11 years ago or so now, and I think of her as my angel. I don't think she would want to see me suffer as I am now. I think she would want me to be at peace, I don't know what to do, am at a loss. I did call my T. and maybe she'll call me back, but am not going to count on it.

I just wanted to let everyone know that I appreciate your comments and will think them over. you have all been so nice to a person you don't even know. I don't know if I am worth this much, cause I certainly don't feel it. I feel dull and boring, and of corse worthless. i feel like a piece of crap that isn't worth anyone's time.
I don't mean to be such a downer...I just am saying what am feeling. I hate myself, and have to find someway to fix it or something bad is going to happen...i can feel it. I don't know the first step or what I should even be doing. I know that something has to happen, I just don't know what.

Hi dear Jen....no, your grandmother doesn't want to see you suffer. Feel her wrap her arms around you. Think about how much you love her, and she you, and let that touch your heart. Do you honestly believe she would want you to end your young life right now?? She must have lived through a lot in her own life, and can give you strength. Think on the things that she might have taught you, what would she tell you right now?? How beautiful and strong you are, and how much she loves you? I would bet on it. I know its hard sweet Jen. Please give yourself a little time, and reach out. :o :hug: :grouphug:

My grandmother was the sweetest person on the face of the earth. She didn't deserve to go the way she went. She went so fast because of the cancer. Six weeks to the day of diagnosis she died. How fair is that? I want to be with her. I want to really feel her hug me and wipe my tears away. I want her to tell me everything is going to be ok. But that's not going to happen. Things are not going to be ok. I need/want to be with her now. I miss her so much it hurts.

Jen, have you read into some of the stories here on NT? There really are MANY that share our,,Your,,feelings! I also understand when you say you don't want to worry your family! I did the same & still have NO idea why?? Why didn't I want them to know?? But anyway...I hear ya!
Scared,,,do you know of what? I finally figured why I used to be.....but that can wait...Right now I want you to know that at the very least...you never have to be lonely again,,,,you have new friends right here! Please always know this & never feel afraid to reach out....No one here will judge you!.....

Jen...life isn't always fair from our perspective, we don't see through God's eyes to understand why things happen the way they do. Again, I have to ask you, what do you think your grandmother would say to you right now? Please call the hotline sweet Jen. And keep talking. You CAN get through this, and life CAN get better, life right here......:hug:

you guys have been great to me, and I really appreciate it. My Therapist still hasn't called and am getting desperate. I know i shouldn't count on people because in the end I get dissapointed. I always do, and should know better by now.

Jen, have you heard back from your T? If not you might think about calling them again and letting them know it's urgent you speak with them.

I'm very sorry to read about the terrible pain you feel from losing your grandmother. It does hurt, I know.

You said your grandmother wouldn't want to see you suffer as you are now and that she would want to you be at peace. Yes, I'm sure you're right that she wouldn't want you to suffer, but she would want you to live a long and peaceful life. It is possible.

Just get through this crisis today. Phone your T. Phone a friend... ask them to come be with you. Just for comfort. Just so you know that someone who cares about you is there with you. Are your Dad and stepMom home right now?