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06-11-2009, 02:41 PM | #1 | |||
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Senior Member
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Since Dad's burial last June I have a new love. Butterflies. Yellow ones in particular.
That day was so traumatic. First I helped to lay him in the ground, and then we had the public service. All through the day, when I thought surly my life was ending, there was this spectacular pale yellow butterfly dancing around the graveside. At first, I was angry at that poor little butterfly, just as I was angry at the sun for shining, the world for turning. Every single time I broke down, that damn butterfly would wisp by. When the words being said were too much , when the pain was too much to bear, I took to watching that butterfly. After the service, I left our favorite flowers with him, yellow roses.. and we went down to the local church for the "reception". It was more than I could take. I made my way back to his grave, I needed to be alone to say good-bye. As soon as I saw the stone I fell apart. I half walked half crawled to be beside him. My husband found me there, sobbing, sprawled across the stone. When he was trying to help me up, I happened to look down.. and there on the roses, the butterfly was resting. Yellow roses, and a yellow butterfly. If not for the whispering movement of his wings, I wouldn't have seen him. I sat there stunned, just starring at that butterfly. I sat back down, and placed my hand near the flowers. I inched closer and closer to him, he never made a hint at moving. As I put my finger beneath its belly, the butterfly sat on my hand. I sat there like that, in awe, for some time. A quote came to me.... I can't remember when I first heard it, but I know it was my Dad who told it to me.... "Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it turned into a butterfly." It has been a year since that day, and I still can not find words to express the emotions that flew through me at that moment. I knew Dad was at peace. I knew he was there with me. Every single time I have gone to his grave, I have seen a yellow butterfly. Not orange, purple, blue...but yellow. Crazy to think Dad came to me by way of a butterfly? Perhaps. But, it brings me peace. I love you Daddy
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******************************************** More Than One Soul Dies In A Suicide . ******************************************** . Last edited by Nik-key; 06-11-2009 at 03:25 PM. |
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06-11-2009, 04:30 PM | #2 | |||
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Senior Member
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Ah Nik-key... thanks so much for sharing this with us.
Of couse the butterfly is your Dad! wow |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Alffe (06-12-2009), barbo (06-12-2009), BJ (06-12-2009), Burntmarshmallow (06-11-2009), GmaSue (06-23-2009), jaded2nite (06-13-2009), Lara (06-12-2009), mistiis (06-11-2009), Nik-key (06-11-2009), ~scrabble (06-16-2009) |
06-11-2009, 05:41 PM | #3 | |||
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Magnate
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Nikki, that was so beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing
I have always dreamed with something like that happening to me.... still waiting for something as magic as that in my life.... Those little messages God send... wow. Im so glad to read you had one |
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06-11-2009, 06:07 PM | #4 | |||
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Senior Member
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That's beautiful Nikki, and I don't doubt for a minute that your dad was and is with you. sssss and prayers.....
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LOVE IS ALWAYS THE ANSWER........ . "Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?" Thoreau ~ You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving. ~ |
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06-11-2009, 07:41 PM | #5 | |||
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Senior Member
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I believe with all my heart Nikkey that your dad is with you every minute of every day.
Often I feel my brother here with me, especially when I play his favorite songs. I often feel like I have a sixth sense about things & that at times of great crisis in life, I have an angel looking after me...That Angel's name...Mark.
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. . . . Cats nap, only humans put them "to sleep". Sterilize, don't euthanize!! BJ |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Addy (06-12-2009), Alffe (06-12-2009), barbo (06-12-2009), Brokenfriend (06-13-2009), Burntmarshmallow (06-12-2009), GmaSue (06-23-2009), jaded2nite (06-13-2009), Lara (06-12-2009), mistiis (06-11-2009), Nik-key (06-11-2009), pono (06-13-2009), ~scrabble (06-16-2009) |
06-11-2009, 08:02 PM | #6 | |||
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Senior Member
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I use to believe that there are some things that seem too precious to share. Then I came to know, it isn't that they are too precious, you just need to find special people who will understand. I have found that here with all of you and I thank you for giving me a safe place to share
I should mention, I wasn't the only one who noticed the butterfly that day. It was another family member who pointed out to me that the butterfly had landed on my shoulder when I was breaking. In my heart, I know it was Dad I too believe that Dad is with me. Those closest to me - know about the butterfly..... they know whenever I see a yellow butterfly, I am going to talk to it. Yep, I carry on conversations with them as if it were my Dad . What is kind of neat, last week was a hard one for all of us. Me, my sis and the kids were all out in the yard. We saw a yellow butterfly, but this time it wasn't just me that said Hi. 4 Voices rang out greeting Dad in their own way. Through the tears, we all burst out laughing. Such a gift ((BJ)) Thank you for sharing your Angel ((Mark)) with us
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******************************************** More Than One Soul Dies In A Suicide . ******************************************** . |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Alffe (06-12-2009), barbo (06-12-2009), BJ (06-12-2009), Burntmarshmallow (06-12-2009), GmaSue (06-23-2009), jaded2nite (06-13-2009), Lara (06-12-2009), mistiis (06-11-2009), pono (06-13-2009) |
06-19-2009, 10:24 AM | #7 | |||
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Legendary
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Dear Nikkey,
as this is your thread, i could not but read your story. and i found it immensely touching. i am sorry for your loss. i do think there must be something to butterflies. Perhaps your Dad pegged it with his quote... they do represent metamorphosis, from something that lives on earth, to something which flies light and free... like the spirit. May i share with you very simply that a friend of mine lost her mom about a year ago... and soon afterwards a yellow butterfly (not white, red, blue, etc, but yellow, like yours) started visiting her regularly. and my friend too, felt it was her mom coming to comfort her through the butterfly. So... is it kooky? i dunno. it seems like, something is happening here. Take care Nikkey. I wish you strength as you struggle with your grief in memory of your dad's passing. And I am glad your yellow butterfly found you, and you had those special moments of connection. ~ waves ~ Quote:
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