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09-04-2009, 06:27 AM | #1 | |||
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this is a bit odd, i'll keep it brief.
i have a work colleague on facebook who commented that she was excited as she was planning to write to/penpal someone on death row. her friends joined in saying 'wow, cool and groovy, what a great thing to do yadda ya... one said that he would ask the inmate how he felt knowing the exact day he was going to die. one said he would like to 'bring joy to someone in his last days' now bearing in mind a couple of weeks ago she bigged up a campaign against the leniant sentence of baby p's murderers, i was quite shocked by it all. i know each to their own and all that but when i mentioned their victims don't have penpals, and why don't they use their time more constructively with amnesty international for example, i was accused of having a ****** ** view of the world. Obviously they only intend to write to the innocent ones, who need comfort in their final days... Oh i give up. it hit a nerve with me and i'm annoyed by it. i know i'm overreacting but would they ask a dying cancer patient how they feel to know when they're going to die? and the fact that innocent people are executed daily in other countries is by the by- that's their fault for violating the laws of their country. (Executed for talking to a man for example). It's a bit strange for me. i've gone as far as deleting her off my facebook. i can't take the negative vibes. Is it me ??? i know i'm taking it personally but i don't think i'm a mean person. cookies and a glass of wine if you got this far... Last edited by Chemar; 09-04-2009 at 07:09 AM. Reason: NT guidelines |
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09-04-2009, 07:58 AM | #2 | |||
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Wise Elder
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Keep the cookies, Pud, I'll take the wine.
Having been a penpal to a couple lifers myself, I confess that there is a certain novelty in communicating with criminals. It's honestly pretty sad to hear from one whose future is gone. While I appreciate your concern for the victims' families, I sincerely question whether they'd enjoy a penpal relationship based on the wounds from a crime. Besides, we don't know for certain that they don't have penpals. For some people, writing to inmates is part of their ministry, for others, a sensational exploitation of those who somehow ran afoul. In my case, it was for art. There are many very talented artists incarcerated in the USA and I admit that I enjoyed the novelty of seeking commissioned pieces. I am also involved in more proactive, community oriented projects, this is just one spoke on my wheel of life.
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—Cindy For every day I choose to play, I set aside a day to pay. —AMN "Sometimes plastic wrap just won't cling, no matter how much money you put in the meter." —From the Book of True Wizdom |
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09-04-2009, 08:06 AM | #3 | |||
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Member
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well i take my hat off to you. you make it sound far nicer than my colleague's bogan friends who just wanted the novelty value.
i meant the victims of murderers rather than the people left behind. maybe i should eat my words too. i'm very hasty to judge these days. |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | AfterMyNap (09-04-2009), Dejibo (09-04-2009) |
09-04-2009, 08:07 AM | #4 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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Pud's friend,
My opinion on this may anger some people too. DH's cousin yelled at me for buying veal Bologna, Did I know how it was made? Yes, I yelled back, but my toddles ate it (geez, my sin was bought twice) and when he started caring about the neglected and abused children all around us giving them the same energy he gave animals, then we could talk. I've seen raped, beaten, emotionally and neglected or physically abused children and all the damage it does to them. We all have a different button that sets us off. Prisons never push mine. I want anyone who hurts or murders a child punished to the max.(English/Aussie to American time - Who/what is Pud? I lost my English neighbor translator friend)
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09-04-2009, 08:22 AM | #5 | |||
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Member
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I used to write to an inmate on death row -- years ago. Was a homicide, in TX, I believe. According to inmate, he'd been an accomplice, not the gunman. May or may not have been true. However, he didn't seem to feel that he was unjustly sentenced -- was just pretty matter-of-fact that, in the eyes of the law, they were one and the same.
For me, it was a ministry. Got into it, because my BF was also doing that. At the time, he was also in a FT volunteer position in a chaplain's office at a local state prison. I didn't condone what the inmate did; we probably only briefly discussed it once, when he thought he should tell me about it. Had said he turned around his life, and was a Christian. Just tried to support him in his walk. At one point, he began giving relationship/sexual advice to me regarding my BF (who has now been my DH for 25 yrs), when it came up that we were abstinent. (I shouldn't have even gotten into that conversation. Don't remember how I allowed myself to respond to whatever questions he'd asked.) I quickly back-tracked and told him that I wasn't willing to discuss that, and he didn't bring it up again. Otherwise, he was usually very polite, and inteliigent. Used words in his vocabularly that were familiar to me, but, that I would never use. His first name was James. ~ Faith
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aka MamaBug Symptoms since 01/2002; Dx with MS: 10/2003; Back in limbo, then re-dx w/ MS: 07/2008 Betaseron 11/2003-08/2008; Copaxone 09/2008-present Began receiving SSDI 11/2008 |
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09-04-2009, 08:24 AM | #6 | |||
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Wise Elder
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Quote:
If your friend's enthusiasm for this is entirely wrapped up in getting some personal recognition among friends, it's actually kind of sick and your point is well taken.
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—Cindy For every day I choose to play, I set aside a day to pay. —AMN "Sometimes plastic wrap just won't cling, no matter how much money you put in the meter." —From the Book of True Wizdom Last edited by AfterMyNap; 09-04-2009 at 12:30 PM. |
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09-04-2009, 11:53 AM | #7 | |||
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In Remembrance
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I think Pud is her horse??
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09-04-2009, 12:51 PM | #8 | |||
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Member
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I know they help train puppies and that makes me somewhat jealous of the love they are given but I guess they are helped by the love and purpose for living the dogs give them and they train service dogs and wild horses too.
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09-05-2009, 08:15 PM | #9 | |||
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Member
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Thanks guys.
I've lost sleep over this one. I should learn to stop expressing my strong opinions. I'm doing it less (can't be bothered for one thing) but you're right, it brought up strong emotions and fear for a naive young lady, then i was threatened by her friends. Never mind. I live and (sometimes) learn. Pud is my little girlie cat. Doofus is my boy cat. and the horses answer to stinky and fatty boom boom. |
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09-05-2009, 10:42 PM | #10 | |||
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Legendary
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Your avatar looks just like the last cat we had. His name was Esky.
He was a big cat but a very big sook. We'd had him since birth but he passed when his kidneys failed, at 16 human years old.
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