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SallyC 10-12-2010 12:47 PM

Thinking of You, ((((Marion))))

marion06095 10-14-2010 05:01 AM

Thank you all for your prayers. I am sure they helped in many ways. Here’s what happened:

On Monday, my brother-in-law assaulted me. He has a history of domestic violence, and he has a volatile temper. When he loses it, he really loses it. Gerry and I were visiting at his house in Bristol, CT, when he lost his temper. I decided to leave, when he snapped. BIL decided I wasn’t leaving and he blocked my exit and started coming at me swearing at the top of his lungs. I was freaked. Gerry pulled him away from the door, and I escaped. BIL then turned off the lights that illuminate his back woodsy yard, which left me in total blackness. Then he came after me, swearing and taunting me. I stumbled across his back deck since I couldn’t see anything, and I finally found the stairs. At that point he tried to push me down the stairs. My walker was at the bottom of the stairs where I had left it and I started across the lawn and was stumbling down a rather steep hill trying to get to my car. Then he tried to push me down the hill. Sigh.

All the while I could hear Gerry in the background screaming at BIL to stop. When I got into the car and locked the doors, I opened the window and yelled for Gerry, saying I have to go. I heard Gerry yell “Go, go, go!” so I went, went went!

BIL lives at the end of a deserted dead-end dirt road. I pulled the van around the corner on to the paved road, turned off car, and waited for Gerry. I waited an hour. Then I left.

When I got home I found that Gerry had left a nasty voice mail for me because I “stranded him.” I gathered a few clothes and things together, and I just left. That was Monday night. I drove and cried and drove and cried for two days. Yesterday morning I checked into a hotel in Myrtle Beach, SC. The first thing I did was call Gerry. All he could do is yell at me because he couldn’t find his cell phone charger. WTF!?!?!

Gerry and his brother have to be in Florida for a meeting on Thursday, and when I called him he was already driving to Florida. I have decided to go home. Damn! Why did I drive so far!? It’ll take me another two days to get home, but it is home that I need most right now. Gerry won’t be back home for a week.

I am devastated. Gerry and I never fight. We both like it that way since we are both sort of laid-back people. In the twenty-something years of marriage I can count on the fingers of one hand the number of times he has raised his voice to me. And now this?

I am a bit calmer this morning. I’m going to take my time driving home. I’ll probably sleep in the van on the way home, so I don’t know if I’ll have Internet until I get there.

Thank you all so much for the prayers. On my way home I will be stopping at the police station in Connecticut in the town where it all happened. I’ll be filing assault charges against BIL. I’ll post again then.

Blessings2You 10-14-2010 05:21 AM

Oh my goodness, Marion, you certainly do need us to continue praying!

PLEASE stay in a hotel, not in your van, unless you can park in a police station parking lot or something! You don't need MORE trouble!

The situation with your husband was way more than a "fight"...that's very frightening that he was so little concerned for your safety. That was abusive behavior (as you already know).

Dejibo 10-14-2010 07:07 AM

((hugs)) :hug: I am so happy you are safe. Please put your foot down to BOTH those monkeys and tell them that if that episode is ever repeated, EVERYONE is going to jail! Connecticut takes domestic violence very seriously. I would get a restraining order against the BIL and let Gerry tell him NO! you will never come near her again. EVER! If Gerry has a problem with that then perhaps he should be bunking over there. Violence is ALWAYS a deal breaker.

You are a good person and deserve better than that. I am so proud of you for leaving, and so proud that you kept going. Trying to put as much distance between you and them as possible.

PLEASE dont sleep in your van. If you do DONT answer the knock on your window from strangers asking you to take them "just one exit to their broken car" my friend was just robbed at a NC rest area. PLEASE, its worth the $50 for a motel. Be safe.

We are all here to support you and cheerlead you in any situation. Please be safe. :hug:

marion06095 10-14-2010 07:56 AM

Dejabo and all, thank you so much for worrying. As for sleeping in the van, I have the perfect method to be safe. All along I95 they have big “travel centers” just off of many exits. They are 24-hour truck stops as well as a 7-11 type store, gas station, and sometimes a few fast food places. They are very busy all day and night long. My van has handicap plates, so I can park in a spot that is right in front of the front door of the travel center. It is very well lit and there are always folks coming and going. I draped a sheet just behind the front seats, so I have good privacy. I have a wonderful reclining seat back there, and even with all the noise and lights I can sleep comfortably without problem. They also usually have security cameras all over the place. I know better than to open the door, or even the window for anyone I don’t know. I’m a pretty levelheaded lady. When I was single and had a career, I traveled alone all over the country for work as well as Europe and Mexico. I have street smarts, and I know enough to never get myself in a dangerous situation. On the other hand, a woman checking into a hotel who is alone and using a walker is a prime target for robbery. I feel safer in the van. If things start going wrong, I can just drive away.

Kitty 10-14-2010 08:27 AM

I'm still praying for you, Marion. What an ordeal! :eek:

I know you and Gerry have been through alot these past months what with his parents dying and having to take care of things so far away (Florida). Sounds like Gerry might just be at the breaking point himself but that doesn't excuse his nasty behavior. Might explain it somewhat but doesn't make it okay.

Please be careful....whatever you ultimately decide to do.....and know that your friends here at NT are praying for you and with you. Please keep us updated so we don't worry! :o

debw 10-14-2010 09:17 AM

:hug: Prayers and Hugs Marion :hug:

Kitt 10-14-2010 09:27 AM

Ditto and take care:hug: What a scary situation:eek:

tkrik 10-14-2010 10:07 AM

(((Marion))) I'm so sorry to hear about what you have gone through. Please drive safely and take care of yourself. I will keep you in my prayers. Check back in when you can.:hug:

SallyC 10-14-2010 12:45 PM

Yike, Marion, what an awful ordeal. You are due the award for the bravest, most level headed one, DH get's the snivling, selfish coward award and BIL should get, at least, 6 mos in jail.:mad:

Drive carefully and be safe. I'll be praying for you, all the way home. Please check in ASAP. :hug::hug:


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