I just wanted to chime in that I also think one-on-one with your grandfather sounds like a lot more fun than crashing a party.

And I just cannot understand...does your father think Lyme disease is more acceptable than MS? What the heck is the difference that would make him prefer that diagnosis? Is there something bad about MS that I am not aware of?

Help me out here. I am truly clueless...

My dad is a chiropractor, and treats people with Lymes disease, because it's common in our area. I think my dad finds something more familiar to him more acceptable. My mother had ALS..bulbar onset with the SOD 1 mutation. In a way, I think my dad is a little afraid. I still love him very much, and continue to try to understand what is going on in his mind. I think when he heard the "sclerosis" part of my diagnosis, it sounded too familiar, and he couldn't accept it. I know that he still loves me. I just think that he's very disappointed in the way that I turned out. It helps me to realize that it's his problem, and not mine. I'll always love him no matter what, but I do need to distance myself a bit for my own mental wellbeing. I called my grandfather today. We're meeting up on christmas eve. He knows about the cane, because I warned him on the phone. He said ok, as long as he can see me it's fine. I adore my grandad. He'll always be my hero. Thank you all for your help and your advice and support.

I'm sorry I was so hard on your Father. I hate it when people are hurt by, especially, loved ones. If you can for give him, I certainly can..

I didn't think you were hard on him at all. You ought to hear some of the things that I think sometimes lol. Thank you again for the support and advice. It's just in my nature to forgive everybody. I've never held a grudge in my life...but for my sanity's sake, I think I may really need to work on keeping my father at a distance for awhile, just until our time together stops making me cry so much.

Wow Josi, I too don't know what to say! I am sooo sorry you are getting treated this way, you soo don't deserve all this!

My dad is like your dad, however he doesn't tell anyone I am ill. He is in denial and just says that everything is OK, even though it isn't! Mums fell out with him several times because of this and all he says is that it hurts him too much to see me ill. It's easy for him to say that everythings OK but i'm the one having to live with this, not him! I just wish he'd think about things and be more supportive!

My grandmother (his mother) is the same. She only lives a block away from me and never attempts to come and see me, even though she knows I can't always visit her. I used to text her all the time and see how she was and all I got was that she was OK, she'd never ask how my mum or I was doing. I've tried everything to get her to understand my illness from giving out information booklets, inviting her to hospital appts but nothing has helped!

After a while, I decided that it would be easier to try and not stress out about my family too much. I've tried everything to get them to understand and nothings helped ... if they want to get in touch they can! I've called them soo many times and they never seem to want to know how i'm doing! I'm not going to lie and say it doesn't bother me, it does but I try and not let it bother me as much as I used to, despite how hard it is.

As well as family members not understanding, i've had uncles tell me that 'It's all in my head' and that i'm not really ill ... I wish they could spend a day in my shoes!

I'm really sorry that you have to deal with all of this also! I know how frustrating and horrible it is! Sorry I can't offer much advise ... just know I am always here if you need to talk!

Take care,
Alison x

This sounds insightful to me and after the horror of your Mom's ALS I can't imagine how scared he is about your health and future especially as someone in the health care field who probably knows a fair amount of the seriousness of a MS diagnosis.

I'm sorry he isn't able to put aside his fears and be more thoughtful to your feelings.

Have a wonderful visit with your Grandfather.

I agree with Jules, after reading about your mom...some men/husbands/dads need to be able to solve everything...and this is something he can't...I wonder if he feels guilty as well...wondering what he did to make the two women in his life fall ill.
Chin up...take care of yourself. Have a great visit with Gpa!!

First of all, I have seen simular reactions in family when they hear a loved one has MS.
Since your mother suffered the same treatment from Dad....I wonder if he is in a type of denial.
Bottom line is: He is making this your fault.
His wife can kiss your *ss.
Go about your business and see Grandpa. Tell your dad that he should take care of his life and you will take care of yours. ITS NOT ABOUT HIM. He needs to put on big boy panties and grow up.

Big Hug to you.....BIG BIG HUG
Ugh....I am so angry!

Why not let him read all these replies? Maybe that will be a big enough hint that he's totally out of line in his thinking.

I wonder how he'd feel if the shoe were on the other foot? He's not exempt from disease. No one is.

Hi Josi,
I have to agree what has already been said by the others. I'm glad you're going to get to see your grandfather without your Dad there. I also agree that it might be a good idea to let your Dad read all the replies here. But then again, I don't know your Dad and it might really make him angry and he might make you feel even worse. And we definitely don't want that! You so don't deserve this treatment from anyone, especially your own father, which I'm sure makes it even worse. Big hugs to you!