[PegMeerkatz]

Hey everyone!

I have been keeping track of the threads but no time to post - trying to get my new business started - that isn't why I am writing now..

I have SERIOUS TRUST & ABANDONMENT ISSUES.. From earliest memory whenever I trusted or loved someone they either died or screwed me. This is one of the reasons I never married I never trusted that anyone would ever stay for the proverbial "forever". When I was told about my adoption & biological parents I learned that she too abandoned me - she left me in the hospital for "the state to take care of" (he sister adopted me).

Just after being dx'd with MS I met Sandra. She was a psychiatrist & helped me get through some really bad stuff. For the next 20+ years SANDRA WAS THERE! She was just a few years older than I am & as time evolved she became my mentor, my friend, my confidant. 4 years ago, January 15 Sandra passed away suddenly & unexpectedly from complications from lupus. I drew more into myself & trust became a bigger issue for me. I DID get into a relationship only to be DUMPED when the person found the MS too much to handle.

Sidebar I had grown disenchanted with my MS Society chapter; there was (is) too much focus on RESEARCH & they seem to have lost sight of the people they serve. Also they are based in a different county & the majority of support groups & programs are in their county too far for me to get too. The asst program direct is not too swift & after contacting her about a program that she was listed as the contact for & finding that she had NO IDEA what I was talking about I contacted the chapter & said I AM FINISHED! I wanted nothing more to do with them. In response the program diretor stepped forward & came to my house several times to help mom & I let's call him "JOHN" (not real name). Prior to the holiday "JOHN" came here a few times & was a big help. He was compassionate & seemed to care about Mom & I.

After his last visit I DID NOT hear from him again. We often communicated by email but he was not responding. Last week I had a program question & sent him an email. I also asked "what gives?" "why don't you speak to me anymore? you seem to be ignoring me". John sent a return email answered the rec question said everything was fine just busy & he would be in touch later in week. I NEVER HEARD FROM JOHN.

Yesterday & today I was tied up with the VAN SAGA (yes it continues) & DID NOT get a chance to contact JOHN. A little while ago I received a mass mailing from my MS chapter regarding programs. The front page has an intro letter - the intro letter said that JOHN WAS PROMOTED & ON THE 21st IS GOING TO ANOTHER CHAPTER.

I REALLY FEEL that JOHN WAS IGNORING ME after the holidays because he knew he was leaving & once he left he WOULD NOT have to deal with me anymore. I just sent him an email to this effect. It just proves my point - DON'T TRUST PEOPLE & MOST PEOPLE ARE FAKES! I really thought that John genuinely cared.

From now on it is me & Esperanza I am convinced now more than ever that

THE MORE PEOPLE I MEET ~ THE MORE I LOVE MY DOG!

[Dejibo]

I am sorry that happened to you. John should have told you he was being considered for a promo and that if it happened, he would be less available, but would find someone else to help you. Was there a contract for him to come for X # of sessions? or was he a "I will see what I can do" kinda guy? Was he helpful while he was there? Are you and mom making progresss? or did you back slide once he moved on?

Many people are busy leading their own lives, and busy doing things that benefit and further themselves. Yes, animals are more trustworthy are their whole goal in life is to please you and only you. They will go out of their way to seek stuff for you, and learn tricks and wait patiently for you. Humans get bored and must meet their own agendas. Many feel the world revolves around them, and its kind of true. Their day does revolve around their schedule, their clients, their hunger, thirst or need to get from point A to point B and many social worker type people while extremely helpful are doing a J O B! it was their J O B to take care of your needs, or your laundry or your upset and hurt, but when they are handed a new JOB they let go of the old, even if the old had special folks in it. It is really rare for folks to hang onto old clients, even if they loved you.

My hope is that you will begin to use yourself as a vehicle into a better tomorrow. Take a peice of what you have learned from each of these people and use that knowledge. Take the knowledge, advice, and support you are being given and use it to build a bridge to yourself, instead of a bridge to them. (God, I hope that makes sense)

I hope you are able to contact that chapter and let them know that it was UNfair for them to put this man in your path only to have him disappear and then announce publickly he moved on without a substitute being provided for your family. As the old saying goes "feed a man a fish, he eats for today, teach a man to fish and he eats for a lifetime" I hope you take the peices provided for you and learn how to fish so you can start feeding and caring for yourself without having to wait on or count on these folks.