NO to couples counseling!

Yeah that one kind of threw me for a loop too. I figured she would be all about couples therapy.

But she made some very valid points. I need to continue doing what I have been doing for me. I need to claim my small victories.

And I need to live with the acceptance that he is moving out in June. I have found my acceptance and my rational and I need to keep them both. He says he wants to stay but he also said he wants to go and it seems he doesn't know what he really wants. Me allowing myself to think he is going to stay will only cause more harm if he decides to go.

HE needs counseling on his own to sort through all of his feelings and emotions. I need to continue with my therapy and only after we have both figured things out on our own will we be able to make a rational decision on where things stand between us.

That doesn't mean I have to be bitter and it doesn't mean I have to stop loving him. Now is a time when he will need my love and my strength but if he doesn't make the effort on his own to face his own problems he will never be able to handle our problems as a couple and I will never be able to forgive him or let him back in.

She recommends we both take time off and work on ourselves and if we decide that this relationship is something we both want and we both want to put forth the effort and the work, then and only then should we consider couples therapy to work through the past issues and try to figure out what triggers tham and how to handle them in the future.

Makes sense.