[Blessings2You]

I'll be glad when today is over. I've been trying to "take it easy" without staying in bed all day, and it's not as much fun as you'd think.

This isn't a rant (at least not yet), but shlumping around from chair to chair just makes different things hurt or not work. I would have been better off to have just got into the recliner and stayed there, but I thought I'd cowboy up and at least give the appearance of being up and about. I need a better plan.

[ANNagain]

Blessings, I SO understand this!

More blessings,
ANN

[SallyC]

I'm not even bothering to shlupp around. Nobody here to shiv a git, anyway. Tomorrow is another day, Scarlett..

[mrsD]

Perhaps you need a new kitten? Houdini, here, is very busy and wants to play all the time! He is good exercise for me!

When not playing with me, he is playing with Weezie and they are fun to watch.

[Blessings2You]

NO THANKS!! We are currently trying to help a "new" cat adapt to our home, and so far (after a month) our two other cats are scared of him, and there is way too much hissing and spitting for me. He's a fairly big cat, and we have one delicate cat, only 8 pounds and ten years old. It's making me even more exhausted and anxious!!

[mrsD]

Originally Posted by Blessings2You

NO THANKS!! We are currently trying to help a "new" cat adapt to our home, and so far (after a month) our two other cats are scared of him, and there is way too much hissing and spitting for me. He's a fairly big cat, and we have one delicate cat, only 8 pounds and ten years old. It's making me even more exhausted and anxious!!

Best way to get them more friendly..... FOOD.... great food treats for each one.

Every time the others are not showing anti-social behaviors, give them attention, tell them they are good kitties and give a favorite tidbit...(here it is Chicken or shrimp). A special treat at least once a day for each one at a different time also goes a long way.

Oreo is finally accepting Houdini... he is very cautious around her. And she has forgiven me somewhat for taking her to the vet for the needles! (and medication stress). I sit and talk to her quietly with a whisper, telling her Houdini wants to be her friend etc, and it is working. But I tell ya FOOD wins every time.(at least for us). Oreo weighs 8 lbs too and is 13 and has cancer. She looks huge and weighs 8 lbs... go figure!

Reward the new kitty each time he is non-aggressive too.
Fresh catnip goes a long way here too!

Try and keep very cool/calm when the hissing starts... they feed off you and your tension. I used this calming when I was taking Oreo to all those Vet visits... she'd cry and tremble. And I'd lull her and it worked, slowly, but it worked. If they sense you tense they feed off that.
I'd come home exhausted, though... as it took alot out of ME.
She is sitting with me now, here in the computer room and when I was doing some music for us... she decided she liked some of it too. So now she comes to me in the afternoon (hoping that day will be special tuna day), and falls asleep to the new music.
Here is an example:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5L7px9EicFs
I discovered this music from a cat video where a cute cat did Yoga with her owner to this musician. Some of his stuff is louder than others. But Oreo likes this one alot.

[mrsD]

Also... I'd like to add about males introduced to females...

My son adopted an orange tom 7 yrs old from someone who had to give him up (moving).

His other two are females. The middle one Tima, gets into a "sexual" thing with him. She came into heat twice before he could spay her (before Garfield showed up).. So she has some female behaviors set.(she stole into his house when he had the door ajar in November weather at his old apartment when he went to throw his trash in the dumpster). She had decided to live there since she saw other cats in the window, and so he kept her. She was very thin, but healthy, and lived a hard life in dumpsters. So she interacts with Garfield differently that Ellie does (who was spayed earlier). Some play with cats involves growling and some screaming. It is a personal trait and different for each animal. If the ears are not flattened, but there are vocalizations, then the interactions are not very alarming. Aggression involves lowering the ears for all cats. Some females just "warn" off males, because that is how they interact. Tima will growl at Garfield sometimes, and not others. We did not see one vocalization at Xmas and they all got along well. Even when the food was given!

In general males will "keep trying" as that is ingrained in them, and we watch Houdini slowly close the space between him and Oreo. It took him 2 weeks to get Weezie to play at all, and yesterday we saw him sleeping with her on a cat tree ledge! First time in MONTHS. He wants to cuddle desperately. But he is slowly making progress with her! She was afraid of him too, but slowly is accepting him. I don't know how they will be after he is neutered yet...that will be a month more I think.

I think slowly the fearful cats will relax, especially when they are "treated" in a relaxed state. Withhold the treats, when hissy. Don't react to hissy either. They may interpret your tension as a confirmation of their suspicions! Cats are very sensitive I've learned. Many mistakes I've made myself. And in the end some are extremely stubborn...like Sheba was.