Cat lovers, nurses, & friends:

On Monday my orange cat, Gandhi ("G"), suddenly developed paralyzed back legs while eating supper. He let out an awful cry. I picked him up and called a friend to take us to Angell, an animal medical center run by the MSPCA . It's a mile away. He cried the entire way and panted.

In the ER I was able to tell them that this had just happened. They took him out of my arms and right into the ICU for pain meds and exam.

G. had a "saddle embolus" blocking the arteries to both legs. They become cold, immobile and it is very painful. They gave him IV morphine twice and then switched to a pump of Fentynl. SO met me at the hospital.

The ER doc (vet) told us that this has a very poor prognosis. That if he lived it would be an average of 25 days in the hospital until he could come home and he might not be able to walk or walk well. They don't use clot-busting drugs on cats for several reasons but major bleeding is one of them. Life span for those cats that do get discharged is less than a year.

We were asked to make a decision about euthanasia or treating w pain meds and O2 and having cat cardiology see him. We were not in agreement so we decided to go for the 24 hours.

In the morning, the cat cardiologist called and said that G's heart was full of clots and it was likely that even if this did resolve it would happen again soon. He said it was a nasty disease w no good treatment option.

SO and I went to the hospital and visited G in the ICU. They took off the one side of the incubator like cage. I talk to him and nuzzled him and kissed him on his head. He knew I was there and leaned against me. We traded off so SO could do the same. After 40 minutes we gave the order. It was the hardest thing I have ever done.

Gandhi was 14. He lived for 20 hours after the initial event.

I cry when I see one of his bowls, his box, a toy. I look up when a piece of newspaper is disturbed by one of the other two cats. I had such a special relationship w the Orange Guy, Orange Mouse, Gandhi-ji. My teacher. It hurts bad. And if I cry, I get TN and if I hold it in I get TN. It's a small price to pay.

ANN