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-   -   Prayers for Doydie and her husband... (https://www.neurotalk.org/the-stumble-inn/236319-prayers-doydie-husband.html)

ger715 08-30-2016 07:07 PM

I like that...."baby steps". At least he gets every thing ready. Maybe he'll even sneak in a kiss or two.


Gerry

doydie 08-30-2016 09:30 PM

He is doing much better in giving a proper hug. I call them Peterson hugs because that is my maiden name and I think it required of all Peterson's to know how to hug. Also it doesn't hurt to be Baptist! The other day we were watching a show and a Dad was hugging his daughter and I pointed out each part of the hug, putting arms around, hands firmly on the other's back, staying in that position for awhile. I know he is very concerned, would do anything for me. All through our married lives, which will be 44 on Sept 2nd, his way of showing love is gift of service. Or he would write a poem and leave it. He is not a person who buys something because he doesn't want that person to feel obligated to give back. So he is accepting of knowing I go out and buy it. Sometimes our youngest daughter realizes that I need something from him. So she will go out and 'guide' him. This Mother's Day he actually drew a picture of what he wanted to buy and then went out to try to find it. Um Charlie, that doesn't happen. You pay good money for some one to make it. But what he got was perfect and I adore it.

tkrik 09-01-2016 01:28 PM

Baby steps are good. At least it's a start. There is an emotional aspect to changing your bag that is hard to explain. Looking down and seeing you stoma can be emotional for some. For me, learning to change it was easy as I had not choice. I would be home alone and having to do it on my own. There was no one to do it for me. The other thing was that my stoma was flush, like a belly button, so I didn't have a part of my intestine peeking out at me. :D That was helpful too. Some people never get over the emotional part of having an ostomy and are so disgusted by the whole thing. It's really sad as many of us who have/had ostomies got them to save our lives. Mine saved my life, literally!

Do you explain the process to Charlie as you are changing his bag? That might help him if he ever needs to change it himself. Also, maybe giving him little tasks to do as the next baby step, like cleaning his skin around the stoma, might help.

I'll bet you never knew that you would end up changing ostomy bags again. I remember you mentioning that you loved doing it when you were working at the hospital years ago. It's definitely an art.

You are doing great in helping Charlie despite your own health issues! You are a very strong woman and one to be admired.:hug:

doydie 09-01-2016 07:20 PM

thanks for the vote of confidence!

ger715 09-02-2016 08:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by doydie (Post 1222496)
thanks for the vote of confidence!



doydie;
You have my vote of confidence too!!!!!!! You are an amazing woman/nurse. Love the way the nursing in you explains/describes to those of us not so "with it".


Gerry

ger715 09-05-2016 07:29 PM

tkrik,

I believe your stoma was temporary. I wonder if that might possibly be the reason you didn't have any intestine "peeking" out.

PamelaJune has added a thread titled "Hernias". While hernias occur in many areas; they a can also occur in the area of the stoma.

You are probably right about some emotionally having difficulty with the stoma. If he hasn't already, your suggestion of one of the "baby steps" Charlie might try is cleaning the area around the stoma.

Having doydie as his teacher is certainly helpful. She sure is one to be admired.


Gerry

PamelaJune 09-06-2016 01:44 AM

My bag was temporary as well, 6 weeks or less from memory (maybe only 4)? I don't recall anything peeking out, that said, I was highly medicated for the duration, at best I can only recall the pain each time the nurse changed the bag. I remained in hospital the entire time and caught MRSA. Fun times - not!

doydie 09-06-2016 01:32 PM

PamelaJune, I can not imagine what you went through. thank heavens for sedation.


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