She is collecting support from the state for both children, even though her son isn't living with her. Her biological other begged me not to report her to the state for not having her son and collecting benefits for fear that the daughter would take the son back. Right now she has guardianship of the DGS but it's "given" by the daughter so she can revoke it at anytime. And she has been tested for drugs and it came up negative, her form of self-medicating is alcohol. Which is stupid, but not illegal unfortunately.

I desperately want to drag her down to the Catholic Church, let them put some of the Old Testament teaching on her. But honestly we have a "family meeting" at least once a week and immediately following she's out the door and off doing what she just said she "understood *sniff, sniff* and I'm sorry..*sniffle* I'm trying... *sob*" okay lets go party and hook up with random guy of the week. I mean she's 25 I can't very well put her over my knee (well I did beat her butt when she borrowed my moms car and got ****faced and had some random guy from the bar drive her home in my moms car) she got a tanned backside for that and was so shocked that I actually struck her backside that she behaved herself for a good two weeks afterwards. I mean even when she was a little kid I never gave her spankings. But then my rule for spanking a child has always been only if they are doing something that can seriously injure them or someone else. Slap your brother, go stand in the corner, throw a knife even just at the floor in a tantrum your better be covering your backside. Run off in a parking lot, especially a full one and it's a quick snatch, swat now hold my hand like you're supposed to. Random guy driving a borrowed vehicle because you're passed out drunk and I don't care if she's 50 years old, she'll get the belt next time.

I'm ready to start treating her like child she is acting like, stand her in the corner, swat her when she's endangering herself or her children. Maybe spending 25 minutes a day standing in the corner will do her some good, at least that's 25 minutes a day that she isn't on her cellphone looking for her next hook-up. I wanted desperately to make one of her house rules to be copying the house rules 10x a day, but the DH wouldn't go for it. It worked when she was a kid though. She had her set of 10 house rules, any time she broke on she had to sit down and copy the rules 10x each. It gave me at least 2 weeks off from her breaking a house rule.

I was clearly brought up Christian, Ten Commandments in the Bible, ten commandments for MY house. Break one of the commandments and you're in far more trouble than if you're just being a mischief maker. Even the DGD has her list of 10 rules and everyday she asks for them to be read to her. About the only one she still can't remember is number 4, no running in the house . But as she's started to remember that one she'll "skate" in the house, it's not running . Now she's only 3 and cannot only remember that she has house rules, but can also follow 9 out of 10 of her rules. Her mother has 10 rules and has yet to make it a day without breaking every last one of them. The DH's idea of "talking" to her every time she breaks a rule is not working. But there has to be a middle ground between "talking" to her and throwing her stuff out by the roadside and telling her she has until trash day to come pick her stuff up.

I just have yet to find that middle ground, hence the massive amounts of stress I'm under . She has basically her own vehicle so we can't exactly take away her driving privileges, though I will say if she ever shows up at the house smelling of booze after driving a vehicle home, she might be lucky if the cops get there in time to find her body. Even before losing my uncle to a drunk driver it is something I have never once in my life tolerated, I even got stuck in Jacksonville once because our DD decided she could have a drink or three and drive us all home... the cops did not agree and my DH had to drive down to pick the rest of us up from the bar. The girl I called the cops on never spoke to me again, but everyone else when they sobered up realized that I spared us all a night in jail for calling them before she drove the car. I mean the cops were sitting on the corner watching for drunks leaving the bar. My own personal rule has always been not on glass, not one bottle, not one shot or one sip will I operate a motorized vehicle. Though I do admit to riding a horse drunk once.... never again, rule for horse is now the same for vehicles. And that was in an enclosed arena, on an animal that had its own brain and was perfectly sober.... trust me on this though it is still a bad idea. I sobered up and found myself hurting in places I didn't even know existed on the human body.

Anyways going to try and get some sleep, the daughter still has not returned from wherever she went now yesterday afternoon around 1:00 and it's now going on to 7 am

Starz, I think it's time for a Judge Judy meeting.

I know....it seems like a never ending drama fest with your step daughter but can you at least notify the police or Family and Children Services of everything you've told us here? Could they not do something.....even if it's just scaring her with threats of what could happen if she continues down this path?

If there wasn't a child involved the choice would be obvious.

Already called the police and family services, along with probate court to see about temporary guardianship of the DGD and the Supreme Court to see about getting custody of the DGD... everyone's sympathetic and disgusted with my step-daughter but legally can't do anything . She is supposed to be working with a social worker but since she went MIA in the beginning of December when the social worker was supposed to visit her, we'll see if her lack of communication to them and refusual to follow the ordered parenting classes and home visits doesn't change the legalities a bit. Because believe me, just as soon as she loses her custodial rights to the children, she's out of my house for good. Or at least until she gets her life together. The assistance stops here, and once I know she can't legally just take off with the DGD, believe me her stuff will be out on the curb for the trash man to come pick up.