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Television may insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer!
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Every time someone comes up with a foolproof solution, along comes a more-talented fool.
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A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
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My wife got 8 out 10 on her driver's test--the other two guys managed to jump out of her way.
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I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me, the table and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way. :p
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"I changed my password to "incorrect" so whenever I forget it the computer will say, "Your password is incorrect."
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Why do medications never have any good side effects? Just once I'd like to read a medicine bottle that says, "May cause extreme sexiness"
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I'd love it if it would say "May cause unexpected weight loss."
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Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.
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Kindness is a language the blind can see and the deaf can hear.
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