so whatare you suppose to do everytime he doesnt get the fatigue issue u smack him with a spoon? :rolleyes: sorry could not refuse to add my half pence in here


hi folks

when we go out shopping my wife doesnt seem to grasp the fatigue issue at all still drives ,me nuts

My sister wants me to take a trip with her to NC to visit our cousins and uncle. She wants to fly to Atlanta from VA and then we can drive to NC and stay with them (they have a beach house that we can stay in).

I cannot convince her that I just can't do that - not right now. She says she'll drive and I can just relax and ride along. She doesn't understand that I can't sit for hours on end - she doesn't understand spasticity, bladder problems, etc. Not to mention the heat that plays terrible tricks on me in the summer. And no matter how I try to explain it she just doesn't "get it".

Sure, today I might feel like I could make the trip, but an hour from now I might be on the couch for the rest of the day with fatigue and pain. It's hard to make plans such as these.

Ah yes, the old catch-22 of MS (and other chronic diseases). Is it more complicated and tiresome to go somewhere and do something, or to try to explain to someone why it's so complicated and tiresome?

My husband "gets it" as much as anyone other than my friend with lyme/fibro. He has health issues of his own, and he's as understanding as he's able to be.

But he still can't absorb the concept of fatigue not necessarily relating to what you do, and not necessarily being eased by sleep or rest. He also doesn't comprehend that "fatigue" does not always translate as "sleepy".

Hi everyone,thanks for your replys and support. I can't imagine how much more diificult it would be to manage the challenges of MS without the support of people who understand. So, thank you.

Yesterday went pretty well, the drive down was okay, and I had a nice visit. The drive back turned into an extra hour due to traffic. I was sooo tired, when I got home , I probably couldn't of added 2 + 2 together.

All I need to do is find someone who will drive me around everywhere and I have more energy to visit:)

Hope you're having a good day, Diana

I understand ..... it's so frustrating! She saw me in January when she came in for my other sister's funeral. Not sure what she was expecting to see but she kept commenting that I was "fine" and that she was so relieved to see that I "wasn't disabled". I do a good job of hiding what I want to hide and the invisible symptoms, well, they are just there all the time and I guess I have gotten used to them. Why do people think you have to be immobile to be disabled? She saw how off balance I was at home - her daughter even commented on it once.

Our families love us - I know they do - and they just want us to be able to do the things we used to do. We do too!! And it's frustrating to have to keep "splainin' " the same thing over and over!!

DH and I drive to TN (650 miles) because of our fear of flying. Not the actual fear of flying, but that they broke his power chair last time we flew. So, we drive. It's hard on Jim but he loves to travel. He never complains and seems happy. I constantly ask him to tell me the truth and I do believe he is. Maybe he's so accommodating to driving because I am accommodating when we get there? I let him have a couple of days whenever he needs it to just kick back in the hotel while I go running around with the kin folk. I guess you could say we balance each other.

But now my family and his? Oh man, they don't get it when I say if Jim goes out one day he needs one or two to recoup. They cock their heads and look dumbfounded. Ugh. Do you know what it's like to ask your family to travel up to see you because it's too hard on Jim at times and they never come?