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07-24-2008, 10:31 AM | #1 | |||
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Wise Elder
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The heat is on and so is all the MS crap! So, I thought I'd share this with you all in hopes to give you all a little laugh, giggle, or even a smile to brighten your day.
New Drugs for Women: DAMNITOL Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 full hours. EMPTYNESTROGEN Suppository that eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding you of how awful they were as teenagers a nd how you couldn't wait till they moved out! ST MOMMA'S WORT Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to two days. PEPTOBIMBO Liquid silicone drinks for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and prevents conception. DUMBEROL When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ, resulting in enjoyment of country music and pickup trucks. FLIPITOR Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers. < BR> MENICILLIN BR Potent anti-boy-optic for older women. Increases resistance to such lethal lines as, 'You make me want to be a better person. ' BUYAGRA Inject able stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency, duration, and credit limit of spending spree. JACKASSPIRIN Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary, phone number, or to lift the toilet seat ANTI-TALKSIDENT A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers in elevators. NAGAMENT When administered to a boyfriend or husband, provides the same irritation level as nagging him, without opening your mouth. |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | AfterMyNap (07-24-2008), AZjanie (07-24-2008), Bannet (07-24-2008), Carolina (07-25-2008), ewizabeth (07-24-2008), FinLady (07-24-2008), GladysD (07-25-2008), Jodylee (07-26-2008), Kitty (07-24-2008), MSacorn (07-24-2008), SallyC (07-24-2008), Twinkletoes (07-24-2008), weegot5kiz (07-25-2008), who moi (07-24-2008) |
07-24-2008, 10:34 AM | #2 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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I need some nagament, which drug store is it at? ROFL
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Strength comes in all types of packages, even those you don't expect Dx'd MS 2007, Fibro 2009 |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | tkrik (07-24-2008) |
07-24-2008, 01:22 PM | #3 | |||
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Member
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Ha! Ha! I needed that!
I am mad at the world today
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"In retrospect it becomes clear that hindsight is definitely overrated!" ~ Alfred E. Newman |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | tkrik (07-24-2008) |
07-24-2008, 01:30 PM | #4 | |||
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In Remembrance
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Hehehe...Damnitol is my fav..
Thanks TK..
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~Love, Sally . "The best way out is always through". Robert Frost ~If The World Didn't Suck, We Would All Fall Off~ |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | tkrik (07-24-2008) |
07-24-2008, 01:35 PM | #5 | |||
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Legendary
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Thanks for the laugh, T~ I'm like Sal; the damnitol could be a life saver.
I'll take a case! *easy open bottles, please*
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DM . |
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07-24-2008, 02:34 PM | #6 | |||
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Wise Elder
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Yeah, I like Damitol too. Yet every time I yell it, no one brings it to me.
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07-25-2008, 12:07 PM | #7 | |||
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Wise Elder
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Today's Comic Relief:
LAS VEGAS CHURCHES ACCEPT GAMBLING CHIPS THIS MAY COME AS A SURPRISE TO THOSE OF YOU NOT LIVING IN LAS VEGAS, BUT THERE ARE MORE CATHOLIC CHURCHES THAN CASINOS. NOT SURPRISINGLY, SOME WORSHIPERS AT SUNDAY SERVICES WILL GIVE CASINO CHIPS RATHER THAN CASH WHEN THE BASKET IS PASSED. SINCE THEY GET CHIPS FROM MANY DIFFERENT CASINOS, THE CHURCHES HAVE DEVISED A METHOD TO COLLECT THE OFFERINGS. THE CHURCHES SEND ALL THEIR COLLECTED CHIPS TO A NEARBY FRANCISCAN MONASTERY FOR SORTING AND THEN THE CHIPS ARE TAKEN TO THE CASINOS OF ORIGIN AND CASHED IN. THIS IS DONE BY THE CHIP MONKS. |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Bets (07-25-2008), FinLady (07-25-2008), MSacorn (07-25-2008), SallyC (07-25-2008), Twinkletoes (07-25-2008), weegot5kiz (07-25-2008) |
07-25-2008, 12:44 PM | #8 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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Talk about ADD -- I forgot it was a joke until I got to the punch line. Lol!!!
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Rochelle . . I've lost my mind ... and I don't miss it! LIFE HAS NO REMOTE -- GET UP AND CHANGE IT YOURSELF! |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | tkrik (07-25-2008) |
07-25-2008, 01:31 PM | #9 | |||
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In Remembrance
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Quote:
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~Love, Sally . "The best way out is always through". Robert Frost ~If The World Didn't Suck, We Would All Fall Off~ |
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07-25-2008, 01:38 PM | #10 | |||
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Elder Member
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lol that was good TK
like twinkl I thought it was story too till the punch line
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. History doesn't repeat itself, but it does rhyme.............................Mark Twain . ....... . ... . |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | tkrik (07-25-2008) |
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