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Old 06-20-2009, 10:58 PM #1
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Default So depressed.

I am so depressed.

My dad bought my mom a puppy yesterday. (friday) I had an allergic reaction to it (breathing issue) that my dad gave me a shot from an epi-pen for. No hives, so I dont know and dont think it was anaphylaxis.

We decided that maybe when he was at his breeder's home, they might have had cats around him a lot and might not have ever been bathed till we bought him. He was dirty enough that the water turned really dark when my aunt bathed him for us friday night.

Well, I started having the breathing problem again tonight (no more epi-pen) so my dad gave me an asthma inhaler. I've had some hits off of that tonight and it's helped some, but I still feel like I have problems breathing.

We're taking the puppy back tomorrow. Hopefully.

I just dont understand. I had dogs my entire life, and never had any allergy to them that I knew of. I suspected after my last dog died, since we got a puppy then, and I had an allergy reaction to that, and we decided to return that dog. We thought then, after that dog, that we might have acted too quicky, and thought that it was an allergy to shampoo he was bathed in, or that he'd been around cats. We bathed him with a hypoallergenic shampoo after we brought him home and I still had a reaction

But, I guess I am officially allergic to dogs. I just feel just like I did when TinyMonsters died 3yrs ago. I feel like my dog just died. I'm so disappointed that I have this stupid allergy. I LOVE dogs! I wanted to always have a dog. I guess I just cant do it. Cant even have a cat.

I think I'll go get a goldfish or something. Or I'll go crochet a dog or something. I'm so depressed about this. The puppy was so smart, and fun...and only TWO pounds! Who'd have thought that TWO pounds of puppy could set off such a big allergy in me.

I'm going to just go crawl into bed and cry. I guess I wont ever get another dog. No assistance dogs for me if I ever get so bad with my MS, I guess.

I feel bad for the puppy. He just seemed to latch onto us...especially me. I dont want to do this to him. But, if I cant breathe, I cant have a dog.

I'm going to go cry and hopefully sleep (if I can breathe) and feel like total pondscum for taking the puppy back.
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Old 06-21-2009, 01:12 AM #2
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I am sorry to hear about the puppy. That is a hard thing to have to do, but please don't feel bad bc you have no control over it. I had to give one of my cats to the shelter bc he was mean to my daughter and destructive. Then he got real weird one day and that was that. It made me bummed though bc I kept trying with him.

Then my other cat got diagnosed with diabetes. iyiyi

A strange thing about your post is, you said you were never allergic before. I never had allergies before in my life and within the past year my skin is more senstive and I have more allergies than ever. I wonder if our immune systems just don't start working over time.
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Old 06-21-2009, 01:13 AM #3
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I am sorry to hear about the puppy. That is a hard thing to have to do, but please don't feel bad bc you have no control over it. I had to give one of my cats to the shelter bc he was mean to my daughter and destructive. Then he got real weird one day and that was that. It made me bummed though bc I kept trying with him.

Then my other cat got diagnosed with diabetes. iyiyi

A strange thing about your post is, you said you were never allergic before. I never had allergies before in my life and within the past year my skin is more senstive and I have more allergies than ever. I wonder if our immune systems just don't start working over time.
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Old 06-21-2009, 02:30 AM #4
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Being an animal lover myself, especially dogs, I'm so sorry to read about your allergic reaction. For what it's worth, years ago my grandmother had this problem and lived with my parents who had a little dog. There was some kind of a lotion kind of stuff they put on the dog to keep the dander down so she was able to tolerate it with no allergic reactions. Maybe somebody else has heard of such a thing......perhaps your pcp might know....before you take him back. Just a thought. Good luck!

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Old 06-21-2009, 02:46 AM #5
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I was crying and freaking when I wrote that. I forgot a few things. I was never allergic that I knew of before I had my bouvier des flandres. (big dog on the left of the post)

I'd been having a lot of what I thought were food allergies during the later years of TinyMonsters' life, really bad ones, things that I'd never been allergic to before. I did a lot of eliminating to figure out what foods they were.

After Tiny died, I tried to get a puppy about 5 or 6 days after he died. A yorkie terrier. Brought him home. It took about 6 more hours to react to that puppy than it did for me to react to this poodle today.

At the time when tried to adopt that yorkie, we were thinking I'd just tried to get another dog too soon, and that maybe the shampoo his breeder had washed him in might have been the allergy, or the cats the breeder had, had left cat dander on that dog. But, we took that puppy back because I was having such a bad reaction then. But, we just didnt think it was an actual allergic reaction, that it was stress.

Today with this dog, I was wheezing and feeling like I couldnt breathe. I was getting anxiety from not being able to breathe. My dad gave me the epi-pen shot (that hurts almost as bad as an injection of C!) and I felt a little better, but not all that great. (and now I know that Epi makes me get dry heaves. (oh, that was unpleasant)

We decided that maybe this dog was around a lot of cats, and that maybe the clothes that I'd been wearing the day before (cable guy came early, had to get dressed in a hurry) had cat dander or whatever all over it and that's what caused me the breathing problem.

I changed clothes, went and got my hair cut, came back and took another shower to get all the bits of loose hair off myself, and then went walking around, carrying the puppy for awhile.

We went to dinner, and I started feeling like I couldnt breathe again. Took some benadryl, got home, my dad gave me an asthma inhaler (parents both have asthma) and I took some of that, felt a little better, but it hasnt totally improved.

I'm to the point now that I just want to take the little guy back so that he can find a new human to latch onto. Before he gets anymore attached to us. The store where we got him doesnt have a return policy. But, they'll sell the dog for us on a comission. He's so cute, I think he'll get bought quickly. All the other poodles they had the other day got bought. So they werent even in the store for 24hrs before they went home.

I just feel so bad for my mom. She was so happy with a dog, and now she's going to lose him. At least he's not dead, but he wont be ours anymore. dangit.

I'm just never getting another pet. This is too painful. I thought Tiny dying was bad, but getting attached to a dog, only to have to take him back because I cant tolerate not being able to breathe. This sucks. Sucks more than having MS.

I'm going to bed, I havent slept much for the last several days. (had insomnia really bad!) I think I'll be able to sleep now. Hopefully. Might cry myself to sleep.
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Old 06-21-2009, 09:32 AM #6
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I was wondering if it was not the dog, but whatever was on its fur. Maybe that got in your house? I would wait and see a few days, vaccuum a lot, dust, etc. I know you're suffering with the breathing thing, but it might be worth a try.

If what was on him was bad enough to cause that much of a reaction, it may be there's enough in the house that came off him, that once you get rid of it, you two can get along okay.
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Old 06-21-2009, 02:48 PM #7
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So Sorry, Erin, that sucks big time..
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Old 06-21-2009, 02:56 PM #8
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I'm so sorry, Erin! I can't imagine how hard it must be to get rid of your dog, I don't think i'd ever be able to do that with ours!

I agree with what BrainGoneBad said about maybe leaving it a few days (if you can cope with the breathing issues) and seeing if your allergies settle down any.

I'm not sure but if I recall, you went a few months/weeks ago to see a dog that you were interested in? Did you have any allergy problems when you went then? Just wondering as if you didn't have any problems then, it might be that this is an allergy to something else and not the dog.

I hope you can get things sorted soon so you can get to feeling better. You are in my thoughts!
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Old 06-21-2009, 02:59 PM #9
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well, things are looking up.

The antihistamines are kicking in, and while I still feel like my lungs are not happy with the puppy, I can breathe a little bit easier.

My neighbor told us that when she got her cats, she had allergy problems for a week or two and then things settled down. I just feel really bad for Sam, and dont want to Humane Society him, so we're trying antihistamines and an asthma inhaler to see if that helps me.

I just couldnt rip him away from my mom. My mom has been the sanest she's been in YEARS for the past two days. She's not doing that gawd-awful humming that she does to drive me bazonkers. That alone is worth having the little walking allergen here. So, I'm going to try to see if I can get used to him being here. Hopefully it does, I LOVE dogs, and was so depressed if I could never have another one again.

At least Sam has claimed my mom as his human. He likes me, but seems to really love my mom. Hopefully this will keep my mom active and keep her mind going. We just have to get Sam used to sleeping in his crate, and my mom used to not letting him out if he cries a little bit at night.

I just hope the allergies dont trigger anything MS-ish on me.
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Old 06-21-2009, 06:12 PM #10
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Aww hugs to you! I know that no matter what you decide to do, we will be here to cheerlead or comfort. hang in there.
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