[tshadow]

First, thank all of you for your kind words of support. They feel good. I'll have to remember that and be more supportive in my posts also.

I got new diabetic meds and took them and had a rather quick allergic result. So daughter rushed me to the closer good hospital. And again, I got excellent care! (Education isn't until next week, and it was going to be a month but they got me in a cancellation!)

The doc listened to me about the underlying TOS, and he observed the flushing / redness about the chest / face that so many of us get, and he wanted to make sure I wasn't suffering from TIAs or significant loss of blood / oxygen to the brain.

So finally I got a brain MRI! He also got me a neck MRA! Both were normal!

No MS!

He even didn't mind that I had a collateral reason for wanting the MRI for the MS question.

And then, he put his hand on my ankle and gave me a squeeze and said, "at least now you can rest easier with these questions answered." He thinks the severe dizziness may also be ear related, so just in case, he gave me a script - how unusual is that? What a gem.

There are good ones out there.

Then, I fired my home aide. She doesn't communicate well with me - I believe on purpose - and at this point, she's done things with my food that will kill me. I explain "light" doesn't mean "no sugar", etc., etc., and I can't even list the errors she makes, because, she doesn't care.

Fiance says the home aides don't like me, because they see me, and I "look fine." Then they see me sleep during the day, have a nice big t.v. that I watch when I'm awake, and they think, "she's a lazy..." No matter how nice I am to them, thoughtful about their issues, family, etc., (and I am, but don't want to sound like Mother Teresa here), they tell me they aren't paid enough, ask me for thousands in loans, don't want to give me any personal care - they actually say they hurt or this or that reason why we need to do it another day, and don't show up or call and act like I shouldn't have a problem and just take care of myself.

Don't get me wrong, I am VERY thankful that I have this service 12 hours a week. But it's a weird phenomena that with TOS they really think we're ok. In fact, she said today, "you need to tell me when you need your meds, or you need to show me and teach me how to cook" I told her I don't have the brainpower to do that anymore. She's 50 and goes to massage (PT) school at night, and she's very good at it, (as I've said, she's gifted!) but now IF she does it, she complains the whole time about how she's not paid enough, etc., and I pay her separately for the massages...And I just am not able to teach someone older than me how to cook these days, or set up more charts, etc., as if I were the home aide. By the way, she IS a CNA. She also runs a side-business of housecleaning which she made the phone calls from my house while she knitted, AND she's got a big work comp claim!! (I hate to say it, but there you go, she's got a major work comp claim, and yet she's working a physical position and has a side business and work comp doesn't know either. THAT's why we all get such trouble, folks, with OUR good faith claims. Don't ask me how I know all this...I'm having a real internal ethics battle right now about it...)

So anyways, time for a TOS meeting, doesn't everyone agree? Fiance has learned how to make home-made green chile verde (pork) on rice, and it's INCREDIBLE. He'll make it mild for us, with his home-made vanilla ice cream. All are welcome as usual. Let's find a date.

No ice cream for me.