I heard this on t.v. and thought it applies to a lot of us who no longer can work or support our families.

When a person dies, it is because they are done learning the lessons they needed to learn,
and,

their spirit was finished using them to teach the lessons that were needed to be taught.

I wonder how many of us are being used, in our current incapacity, to teach the lessons that others need to be taught?

Lesssons of:

accepting someone with love when they can't give you money anymore.

helping someone less fortunate.

seeing someone's value beyond the obvious "what's-in-it-for-me" aspect.

reaching out for help from someone when all they can give you is love, emotional support, honest advice.

that life is short and to enjoy it.

that one's health is most important.

Can anyone think of anything else we TOSers teach others?

Or how we may be contributing to others' lives even when we are totally disabled?

I'm not sure what I teach others, but I know I'm not done learning things.

Kelly

I understand your question..

- but I don't really agree with the statements from that TV show.
What kind of show was it ?

sorry -never mind - I kind of got off of the topic of your question.

Jo - I agree with you that the saying is not the end-all on life explanations...hahaha. It actually sounds a little new-agey...

BUT, my point was / is considering that yes, we know our illness causes our loved ones pain and sadness and loss - but has anyone considered what our illness might teach our loved ones?

I never thought of it that way, until...now.

I've been so caught up in the sadness / futility of my illness.

But now I see that it may have taught some of my loved ones a few good life lessons that may actually make them better people, live a better life, and actually enjoy their lives more - than if we'd all just gone on the way it was...

Don't get me wrong, I don't want TOS!
And it has been darned hard for me to accept, accept, accept and try to be positive, rather than "checking out"...

I know that for more than a couple of us, it is a DAILY struggle or fight to stay on this planet. So for some reason, these thoughts gave me some measure of comfort and also distance from my own illness.

That's all. And I always share with you guys...hahaha, even if you don't agree with it, which is really "ok" with me - I do truly appreciate different views, even if sometimes my posts come off a little strong.

And again, does anyone else have any resonance with the idea that their illness has changed their family - but for some good? We already know and agree on the bad part - YES.

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person. When someone comes into your life, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They are there for the reason you need them to be.

They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
.
Your job is to accept this, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime and may you have a beautiful holiday season.

Gail

I think this thread is very appropriate, espeically given the season. The last year has been full of ups and downs, and (i think) too much of me wallowing in my own pity. I have learned ALOT from y'all, and that is priceless.

I try, and will continue to try to teach and help others. Like Tam said, it may be just making someone (a certain mother-in-law *cough* *cough*) more compassionate and understanding towards those with a chronic illness. Maybe it teaches others to appreciate what they have. Heck, I've even learned to better enjoy the good days, or until recently, relatively good stretches of a week or more! I have learned alot- I used to be the first one to judge when a healthy looking person took a handicapped spot, or when someone who looked well claimed they hurt. I was super-quick to judge. And here I sit. Lesson learned, the hard way.

I know that I didn't stumble in here 13 months ago by accident.

thank you.

omg!

That's exactly what I mean - I never turned the prism around to view TOS in this direction.

Thanks so much Dabbo.

And for some reason today, I woke up this AM, sang for my family while making some lethal home-made sugar muffins and tea, lit candles, and everyone had a GREAT time laughing at Mom. Now I don't feel so good - that's ok - we had several hours of LOL from all parties concerned!

God bless.