[JayF]

I'm a 39 year old athlete (former, I guess), with a fairly long history of concussion/head injury along with countless sub-concussive hits. My first documented concussion was at 19, sustained in a vicious car accident. I was unconscious for roughly a half hour immediately following the hit. In terms of grade two and three concussions, I've had eight or nine. Most from crashes sustained in BMX racing. The second to last one was a year and a half ago, and it retired me from the sport. That was the second most brutal one- it was a very hard hit to the back of my head, I was unconscious for under a minute, very disoriented afterwards, burning sensation behind my left eye, confusion, slurred speech, etc. I was physically sick for almost two weeks after that one with the usual symptoms- dizziness, sensitivity to light, nausea, and a crushing electrical-feeling headache. That one seems to have been the straw that broke the camel's back. Memory issues that pushed beyond the, "oh, you're just getting old" types of things began to crop up. I also believe that after that one, it takes just about no effort for me to ring my bell. My neurologist backed it up after my last one when he said, "someone can pretty much give you a dirty look at this point, and you can get one".

My most recent concussion was in March. I simply bumped heads with my son as I was helping him take off his shoes at daycare. The room went dark, my knees buckled, and immediately I had that, "uh oh- gonna barf" sensation. I walked out of there with a tingling head, and incredulous that I was feeling the way I was from a bump that mild. I fought nausea all day at work, and really didn't want to believe that I had another one. The next morning, I felt lousy, but went out to the grocery store when my wife asked me to pick up some things. I had a random encounter in there with a guy who pushed his cart in front of mine (really not a big deal), but I had the sensation that I really wanted to hurt this guy. It was the angriest I've ever felt, times ten. I knew at that point that something was very wrong, and I left immediately. I had a neurological appointment two days later, and it was confirmed that l had another one- and it was a substantial one, at that.

Since then, I've had terrible memory issues. I forget words, what things are called, etc. It's incredibly frustrating. But the most troubling thing are my mood swings. They're random, and go to both extremes- euphorically happy sometimes, crabby others, and then incredibly depressed, where the sad is like a fog. The bad days almost all seem to start off with a memory issue and go downhill from there.

Today was awful- I felt so bummed out that l could have cried without any effort. I ended up calling the neuro's office for the next available appointment. Frankly, I'm a little scared by all of this, and I'm not even remotely excited about what lies around the corner symptom-wise. Do any of you deal with varied mood swings from your injuries?

Thanks,

Jay