[xxxxcrystalxxxx]

Hi guys,

It's been awhile since I've been in touch. I have my computer back. I'm going on eight months since my injury. Last month I had three great weeks. Very minimal headaches and I was able to workout again. I was so siked. I had visions of going back to work. Thought I was finally beating this and was healed. I did have awful whooshing sounds at night so I knew I was tired but very minimal headaches so I thought, ok I guess I can live with that.

I told my docs I was feeling great. My therapist thought me going back to work to get some exposure was a good idea, my nuerologist said he wasn't convinced yet and I would see him 02/07. Well a week later I woke up tired, exhausted, headache, foggyness, depressed. The whole nine yards. I had gone to a few appts with my husband and found the flourescent lights kill me.

When I went back to my therapist and explained what's been going on he said, "your not ready to go back". Well since hearing this I've been depressed. My thoughts aren't good. My husband is scared he said because I've been taking extreme measures when dealing with something that bothers me. I'm so frustrated I just want to blow up literally.

So now I'm more scared than ever. I dont know how many times I can go up and get hopeful only to crash and burn again.

I have been able to take walks and they seem to help calm me. So I've been doing alot of it. I find my headaches calm down when I calm down. I have to say you can only walk so much though. lol

I have a new symptom along with the whooshing sound I have crackling sounds in my head. Like someone is crinkling paper in my head and occasional ear ringing. Is something else going on? should I be concerned or is this just another part of this horrible injury?

I had a frontal injury. 50lb door sharp side hit me in the right side of my forehead near my temple.

[Eowyn]

I know, it is so frustrating. You feel better, then you try to do something, then you end up feeling bad again. It's so hard.

Sorry to hear you're down. Hang in there!

[Mark in Idaho]

I can't address the crackling sounds but can understand the relapse or crash.

Having a few good weeks does not make a recovery. Returning to old activities and behaviors should be done carefully with a slow return to intensity.

Try to let go of your past abilities. Then, you can define and accept your current limitations and slowly try to stretch your abilities. Recovery is not a single point in time. The brain slowly develops tolerance for different functions and activities.

We need to return to these past functions and activities slowly and one by one. We need to also allow time after adding past functions to our daily efforts. The relapse from doing too much too fast usually come the day after the effort.

Just because we did not crash or relapse during the effort does not mean we have regained the ability to out out that effort. We need to avoid jumping into deep water when we have had good days on the beach. Try the wading pool first and wait to see how our brain reacts.

Most of us have learned this lesson the hard way, we pushed to hard in our initial attempt to return to 'normal' activities. Our new normal may be quite different than our past normal.

My best to you as your regain your strength.

[SpaceCadet]

Crystal,

Don't feel bad...I hit a plateau in October and it lasted until a few days ago. Now I've taken a couple steps forward in recovery and then today I took one step back. Like they say, it's a roller coaster. Your going to have a few good days or weeks and then the symptoms will come back and nip you in the butt. It's discouraging, but just know that it's a normal part of the recovery system.

Just be happy you had those few weeks. It should give you hope knowing that your brain still has the ability to function that way. You will have more days like that...and when they come, enjoy them.

New symptoms will pop up and disappear all the time. This happens to me frequently. This is also something that happens to all or most of us, don't worry too much about it.

Keep your "head" up.

Nick

[xxxxcrystalxxxx]

Thanks guys. I had this silly notion if physically im better my head will follow. I guess I was reaching for normalcy where with a head injury im not going to find. Ive come a long way so im grateful. I have alot of healing left I guess.