NeuroTalk Support Groups - Scared to have conversations

NeuroTalk Support Groups (https://www.neurotalk.org/)

- Traumatic Brain Injury and Post Concussion Syndrome (https://www.neurotalk.org/traumatic-brain-injury-and-post-concussion-syndrome/)

- - Scared to have conversations (https://www.neurotalk.org/traumatic-brain-injury-and-post-concussion-syndrome/172743-scared-conversations.html)

I sometimes just don't bother participating in conversations. Its a lot of work to find the right words, at the right time... then if you fail to find them, its embarrassing and for some reason people think they are helping if they correct me or point out my mistakes.

So yeah, sometimes I just sit in silence. Isolating, but whatever.
Starr

Wow I was ao hoping this sight was going to e helpful.

I came here looking for conversation, understanding and support. Now that I am registered I can't join any chats or post a new thread. It is no wonder poeple with chronic pain do desperat things. What is the point in haing this site if you can't post. Anyway, just another form of exclusion and not what I was hoping for. Most likely best if I just let you folks do your thing and stop complaining but that is the only time I get to talk with humans. I pray is is well in your world.:confused:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yankees5 (Post 895317)

Hi there and welcome
You do get a notice when you first post (as well as in the site guidelines) that your first few posts are moderated. We do this to prevent spam. Your own new thread was approved within just a couple of minutes of your posting it ...here it is
http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/thread172844.html

If you could see the disgusting spam and porn that we keep off these forums due to our premoderation for new members, you would understand why it is needed

The chatrooms are ones we share with PsychCentral and not many of our members are active there...it is mainly just chit chat and not health related. Again, we prevent newly joined people from going in there as that keeps spammers and trolls out of the chat.

All these features are designed to protect members and they are explained in the terms & guidelines that you agree to when you register

I hope you find the support you are seeking

Don't give up on us Yankees5. Hopefully the above explanation helps.

I had a similar frustration in joining. I could not get past the captcha no matter how many times I tried. In the end I had to get a mod to create my account for me I just couldn't do it. All I could do for over 2 months was read the posts.

I understand why all these measures are in place but for those of us with brain injuries they are quite the barrier when we are already struggling. I wonder how many people don't manage to make it through. :(

Chat away here. We understand and will try to help if you have something specific you need advice on.
Starr

Hi "Starr" :) yes I helped you register.

You'll be pleased to know we are no longer using captcha and have a simpler method to differentiate real people from spam bots trying to register now

Anytime you have problems there is a Contact Us link at the bottom of every page here, just send a message on the issue you are having.

Sometimes a forum search will find answers for you also, as well as the FAQs -
http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/faq.php

I have the same issue. My family is understanding (most of the time) they talk slower to me (helps a lot!) And wait patiently for me to talk. When I get all mixed up and don't know what to say they don't laugh and they wait. It helps that my mom works in the neurological unit at kessler rehab she understands what a comcussion really is and even if its small how much it can mess you up. I've stopped hanging out with friends and don't do groups. If someone goes to talk to me with the tv or music on I tell them to wait, turn it off then devot all my attention to them if I dnt I don't understand them nd can't process it.

My boyfriend and I recently met one of our neighbors and went to their house the other night. Our neighbor asked me why I was so nervous I just laughed and said oh I'm not. I later asked my bf if I seemed nervous h said yeah you just stood away quietly didn't talk much. He's right! I didn't even really notice but I do pull my self away from people I don't talk much anymore especially around others because I don't make sense and sound dumb. Its just I have so much trouble speaking I don't want others to laugh or whatever. I keep quiet and to myself around people I don't know and no longer go around groups.

I was a very friendly talkative person who could make friend with eveyone. Now I'm quiet and content with the about 5 people in my life my family, boyfriend, and best friend who has also had a tbi.

Quote:

I've stopped hanging out with friends and don't do groups. If someone goes to talk to me with the tv or music on I tell them to wait, turn it off then devot all my attention to them if I dnt I don't understand them nd can't process it.

A lot of us are going through this. It is difficult. Someone here has made a comment about how to deal with it. I don't remember who. (duh)

They said, try to make light of it. Turn it into a joke. Laugh a bit when you catch a mistake. I did this exact thing the other day. It worked!

Believe it or not some people do try to understand and most don't even catch the mistakes like we do. Turning off distractions is a good idea when talking with people.

I struggle with groups especially when others are all talking at the same time.
It's frustrating.

Keep on Fighting!

Hi, everyone --

Wow, thanks for all your kind and encouraging words. I'm glad to see people responded to this thread. I appreciate it.

While this may sound like a weird request, i'm wondering if anyone is willing to share the story about their concussion, or maybe what an MRI or scan showed.

I know every injury is different and unique, and we all heal in different ways. But somehow, comparing stories makes me feel better.

Especially in relation to this symptom, which to me, feels most defeating.

Wow Mark! I love how you described the processes. Is there a way to bookmark or link these posts so family can read them. I have a hard time with words and descriptions and your description could help my family start to understand a tiny bit of what i am going through. I just joined today and am just starting to read the forum and am amazed at the knowledge and support on here.

Jennifer

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mark in Idaho (Post 894808)

There are likely two issue at hand. When you have multiple people in a conversation, it increases the load on your brain as it tries to process a multiple voice conversation. This can cause some mental chaos and mental lock-up.
The frustration with word finding can also be tough.

Maybe you can get some of your family and friends to understand the technical description of your brain's struggles.

The two most common problems are how your brain filters information and sensory stimulation and how it gates or directs the flow of information.

Filtering causes the information to over-load the brain with stimulation. Your brain will need to filter out voices so you can focus on and process a single voice. This excess information causes a sort of traffic jam in your brain. When you are with a group, you can just say that your brain struggles to filter out the voice you want to listen to from the rest of the sounds.

The gating of information is a traffic cop like system. It directs the flow of information to the proper area. It is part of the memory search system. You may need the word bathroom but your mouth wants to say basket. It can be like getting files mixed up in a file cabinet. You pull the file you think you need and inside is the wrong papers. Think of it as your brain sends the wrong word to you mouth. Or, it open the wrong door looking for the word bathroom and instead finds the word basket.

I still do this daily. I can tell you many of the letters of the word or name I am trying to remember but usually miss the most important letters. Yesterday, I was trying to remember the name Tracy at a 4th of July barbeque. I kept coming up with manes with combinations of a, c, r and y but the T never came to mind. Sandy, Cindy, Casey, etc. Like I just typed manes when I meant to type names.

If they don't understand, you can not make them understand. They need to accept what you tell them. Nobody would ever fake PCS just to get attention. It is much more of a problem inside our minds that they will ever observe from the outside.

Hope this helps.

My best to you.