on July 9th, 2013 I was in a severe auto accident where I rolled my SUV 3-4 times and ended up in oncoming traffic. While I avoided even minor physical injury to my body, my car had roof collapse and I hit my head really hard.

I got the concussion exit sheet from my ER physician and within three hours of my accident, walked right out of the ER. I felt fine, but knew that I definitely escaped the clutches of death by a miracle. I went to bed that night thankful for my life.

I woke up a different person. I had severe cognitive deficits right upon awakening. I couldn't do math in my head at all and I was having trouble with word searching. I was extremely foggy and it was immediately apparent that my injury was more severe than anticipated.

I had an MRI two weeks to the day after my accident and it was shown that I had a focal point contusion to my right parietal lobe. I found it surprising that my injury showed so long after my accident, but I can't find anything to say if that is significant or not. Also, I'm a left-handed person, so I have to deal with some issues related to that.

While I have improved slightly, I still have a very difficult time with math and my word-search difficulty is made worse depending on the type of day I'm having. I do finance and accounting for a living! D'oh!

I just reached out to the BIA for my state. I wonder how they can help me.

So the title of my post: I am alive, praise be to God. But, I suffer so much

I desperately want a full night of sleep. I use a pink-noise generator app on my tablet, which I keep bedside. Thankfully that helps to reduce distractions in the middle of the night but I still find myself waking up frequently. My Neuro gave me an RX for xanax to help with panic attacks, which popped up a couple weeks ago, and just last week he gave me a RX for lexapro. I so desperately hope it helps...

I can't get my mind to calm down. I am being tortured by forgetfulness, lack of focus, fog... It is refreshing to know that I am not alone in my suffering. That is primarily why I am posting here now. I want to say thank you to all of you who share your experiences. I know I am being whiney but I had to get that out