Hello! I'm new here.... as a brief intro, my husband suffered a severe tbi last October. A pedestrian stepped into the road and into the path of my husband who was on a motorcycle. He had on a helmet,.but the accident was so bad that he suffered two hematomas (left temporal and frontal)that had to be evacuated. He was essentially lifeless at the scene. HE also suffered an ocular fracture, broken ribs and a collapsed lung. He was in a coma, and presumed in a vegetative state for 15 days. His doctors were trying to convince me to send him to hospice when he miraculously started to come out of it.

Since then, he's made a miraculous recovery. In some ways, he's still himself. Albeit a sleepy, fatigued version. I don't see many personality changes, really. Nothing too big anyway. The biggest thing we deal with, aside from fatigue, is that I'm finding he doesn't tolerate stress well. It's odd. He can handle being out a theme park with our kids for a few hours, for example, probably because that's a familiar routine from before the accident. He can't stay as long as he used to, but he can go. But something like it raining when he wasn't expecting it to, can completely throw him off. Any change in the routine or if things don't go as planned, he can't handle it.. It's like his brain shuts down or off.

He's having trouble walking now too. He will stumble a lit if he's tired or anxious. That's actually a new thing. He says sometimes his hands don't work.

Sometimes when he wakes up, he's disoriented. He's incapable of springing out of bed, and heading out for the day. Can't do it. Sometimes he'll wake up in the middle of the night and he says he's incapable of figuring out if it's day or night. Or doesn't know who he is. I sort of thought he was exaggerating. Tonight, however, he scared me to death. For any of you coma survivors out there, you know coming out of a coma is nothing like the movies...and Channing Tatum is never at your bedside telling you that he's your husband. It's a slow process, marked with confusion and incoherent talk. I look back on these days as the coma lightened, fondly... it meant he was coming back. And even though sometimes it felt like I fell through the looking glass and was talking to the Cheshire cat, I was just so grateful to have him back that anything he said, nonsensical or not, was endearing.

Tonight, he went to sleep and woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. He sat down at the edge of the bed and I asked him if he was OK. He told me he was just waiting for the kids to come upstairs...I pointed out the time, stating the kids were in bed already. He told me he knew that and wasn't being the "brain injured guy"and then started rambling on incoherently. Half of it didn't even sound like English. He started talking about our cat like she was a person. And seemed very irritated with me that I didn't understand what he was saying. I suggested we go to the hospital, but he was very unreceptive to that suggestion and just kept getting more annoyed. I haven't noticed this level of confusion in him for months. We are going on 10 months post accident.He hasn't been this out of it since before Christmas. I know it's no use asking if this is "normal "...with brain injury, there seems to be no standard or yard stick you can measure by... what is normal for one, is not for another. For the level of injuries he sustained, it's a miracle he's alive, let alone recovering and highly resembles who he was before. Everything they told me was wrong. They said hed never come back...they were wrong. They said even if he did, the person I loved would be gone...they were wrong. I don't know.... maybe I'm sensitive. Maybe I'm just scared that this horrible accident could still take him from me....

the accident won't take him from you. There have been four or five times over the past 9 years throughout my various injuries then I talked on and on and my girlfriend just listened until it cleared up. What I talked about made no sense and then as quickly as it came and went away. I can't say that this the case for your husband although I hope it is and you should contact the doctor regarding this episode but have faith. During the day tomorrow people with more knowledge than me will answer your questions.having a brain injury is very trying on the person taking care of them. My girlfriend can attest to that. Welcome to our board.

Hello SnowWhite99,

Is your husband in any kind of follow-up rehab for his head injury? Even though he sounds at a high level of functional mobility, he also sounds like he has some cognitive issues that are persisting.

I would ask your Neurologist or physician who is doing follow-up care with him to suggest Occupational or Speech therapy after you describe these symptoms as you have to us here. No doubt he would benefit from some kind of cognitive therapy.

When you mentioned he has trouble adapting to change of plans, this is fairly common after a head injury. I underwent 5 months of Neuro rehab ( PT/OT/ST), and I have a much better time of dealing with sudden, unexpected changes. I think it was because I was challenged with supervision in that area. Sad to say, I can still get that overload at times, but it is improved.

As you said, he has made a miraculous recovery, but there are obviously still lingering issues. I hope you can get the right help for him to help him heal even further, and for you to find out what this head injury thing is all about, too. Keep in touch. There are a lot of us who are glad to help as we can. Take care, M-i-m

Hi and welcome to NT.

Your husband's injury sounds similar to mine, I also had a skull fracture requiring evacuation of a hematoma. The surgeon that performed the craniotomy later told be "I didn't think you were going to make it". That said, as you will hear, if you have seen one brain injury you have seen ONE brain injury. We all recover differently.

Has he had a neuropsychological assessment from a clinical neuropsychologist? If not that might be a place to start. Specific symptoms can often be helped by specific therapies, be that from a psychologist or from a speech pathologist or occupational therapist as music-in-me suggests. I personally benefitted greatly from their therapy.

Some affects for a TBI may be long lasting or permanent. 3 1/2 years on I still have occasional vertigo and unsteadiness in walking, and I use a cane when I'm out and about away from the house. Part of the recovery process can include making these types of adjustments.

As you have experienced, TBI recovery is usually measured by months or years rather then days or weeks. The very best to you both and you proceed along this recovery journey.

Thank you, everyone, for your responses.

My husband was in the hospital for over six weeks. He was in ICU for three weeks, a regular trauma unit for a week and in patient rehab from Halloween to mid November. After that,bhe was released home and did out patient therapy. He did occupational therapy for about a month and a half and was released from physical therapy in February. He continued weekly speech therapy through April, when the nueropsychologist completed his assessment. My husband was in the average range for the assessment, but the Dr said he could only assume that my husband would have been well above average before the accident, just based on his educational background. He suffers from a stutter when he gets frazzled or tired. Be stuttered as a child and it's funny how the injury reset that.

He has been attempting part time work since the beginning of the month, but it's wiping him out. He woke up this morning and had no recollection of our 2 a.m. conversation. He used to sleepwalk when he was a kid, and our son used to, as well. I told him it was kind of reminiscent of that. Only he had a full conversation with me. He apologized for being snappy. And said when he was a kid, he would sleepwalk outside. He encouraged me to lock our door or put a bell on it so he can't wander without me knowing.

I went back to work PT first also, and it does take some adjustment, but it sounds as if his progress continues.

One other suggestion would be to see if there is a TBI support group in your area. The Brain Injury Association of America lists resources by state and support groups are usually listed. A TBI can be a confusing and scary condition to recover from, support groups can be a place to share hope and inspiration and to learn from others with similar injuries.

http://www.biausa.org/state-affiliates.htm

Here is a book on TBI written from a caregivers point of view:

Where is the Mango Princess?

http://www.amazon.com/Where-Mango-Pr...=ATVPDKIKX0DER

As fate would have it, they have a brain injury support group at the hospital where he did both his in-patient and out-patient rehab. We get a flyer in the mail every month... and I can't seem to get him to commit to going. This episode sufficiently freaked me out... and when I spoke to him this morning about it, I think it freaked him out, too. So I am hoping maybe he will change his mind about the support groups. Back in December, when he was going to out-patient therapy twice weekly, they did a "group therapy" session. It wasn't exactly "therapy"... they worked in groups to build gingerbread houses out of graham crackers.

A little background on my husband... he's a chef. And he has a degree in Pastry. So, as you can imagine, he was most unamused to be building gingerbread houses out of graham crackers. This was very early on after the accident, though. Personally, I thought it was precious. He was the only one to build a two story house. I was proud. It kind of soured him on the group setting. I think it would be good for him. He's never been the social butterfly. He doesn't have poker night with the boys... or go out for drinks with the guys. The kids and me are his entire world...

I know all too well that no two brain injuries are alike. I am sure that played a huge factor in why the doctors felt that he had deteriorated into a vegetative state. As my aunt, who used to be a nurse, told me.. the doctors aren't there to comfort you. They play percentages, statistics and the numbers. The nurses are your support system. And they were. I've seen brain injury up close and personal and from a distance. Eight years ago, my cousin's husband was in a terrible accident and was put into a coma to heal. A friend of mine has a son who is my husband's age, same thing... terrible accident, induced coma. My cousin's husband takes anti-seizure meds daily... and socially, he doesn't fare so well. My friends son now own his own company and takes his family to Disneyland many times every year. There is just no telling how one person will heal compared to the next. Even if their injuries "seem" to be the same. As someone pointed out, recovery is measured in months and years. When I fell in a library and broke my foot 14 years ago, the doctor was able to set the fracture in a splint and tell me how long I'd have to keep it that way. Not so with brain injury...

I looked up Where is the Mango Princess on amazon and purchased it, thank you. My friend, whose son had been in an accident, sent me Bob Woodruff's book "In and Instant" when my husband was in a coma. It is co-authored by both Bob Woodruff and his wife, from both survivor and caretaker perspectives.

I thank you all, again, for your welcome and your responses. Before this accident, my husband and I had been married for 14 years and had never slept a night apart. He is my entire world and I am his.

I encourage you to go to the Brain Injury Support Group, even if you have to go without him. You will meet other caregivers. You can report back.

that was beautiful what you wrote at the end. I hope my girlfriend still think that way lol we are going through a rough time still that's my fault after 7 years has not been flying by lol. You have our full support and we are here at all times. I think he has done great considering where you started and who knows how far he can go. A support group would be great. I am trying to find one in my neighborhood. No one but no one unless they have a brain injury can 100 % relate to someone who does and I think we need that keep giving him lots of love and it will heal him more

SnowWhite,

Is your husband applying for disability at his job or through Social Security ?

SSDI usually requires a year off work before they will approve a claim. They have a few exceptions but I don't think your husband fits any exception. If the attorney is an SSDI attorney, he does not sound very good.

Often, the denial is because the reviewer thinks there is still time for the applicant to recover and return to work.

It appears the primary reason he would qualify for SSDI is his inability to maintain "Pace and Persistence." This means he can not tolerate the stresses of the job. He can not work a reasonable shift. He can not tolerate the work atmosphere. And such. It sounds like he is struggling with rigidity of thought. This is why he crashes when the schedule changes or is interrupted.

Pace and Persistence is an actual term used in the SSDI Blue book.

btw, The vast majority of SSDI applications are automatically denied the first time and many of those are still denied the second time. Attorneys bank on this so the back pay piles up. They get 25% of back pay up to a maximum of $6000. They like to maximize their fee.