Hey Sam,

I experience similar issues.

I believe you've identified a significant factor in why you may feel this badly at times, but I don't think you've completely put things together. That is, I believe your activity level is putting your mind into a dark place, and that this dark place can be mostly avoided by curtailing your activity.

I know that every concussion is different, as are the resulting issues we experience. However, since my concussion I've learned that activity and stimulation have a profound impact on my physical and mental state.

For me, too much activity and/or stimulation have a tremendously negative impact on my physical and mental state. The impact of such events (I call them triggering events) typically lasts 4-7 days, but sometimes for 3-4 weeks. During this period I am a very different person in every way; my wife and children have come to learn this and tend to give me space and time alone. In this state I look for conflict, can feel extremely depressed, I ruminate, feel alienated, and am impulsive, and do not see the good in anything. My head feels different, I think very negatively and darkly.

So, in my experience, these things ALWAYS correlate with too much activity; if I am careful and not in a recovery state, I have humour, can tolerate more family interaction, I don't brood or look for fights, and I'm more open-minded.

Perhaps what you should do is keep a daily activity and headache/mental state log. My guess is that you'll see a correlation between too much activity and how you feel during the next day or days that follow.

If that's the case, and as Mark has pointed out in other threads, try to learn what your indicators are for too much activity or over-stimulation. Once you are familiar with them, you can taper your activity so that you avoid triggering events. I used to be good at identifying these for myself, but recent changes to don't allow me to catch the early queues.

Anyways, I hope this might be helpful. Once I learned that could avoid being in that "bad" state, it helped a lot with my hope. It also made me think that "healing" is likely hampered by the stressful state associated with my recovery periods.

Thank you Micro Man and to everyone else for the replies. Really appreciated.

Sam, please make sure you talk to your parents, your doctor, a loved one or even your closest friend if you continue to feel extremely low and depressed and especially if you're having suicidal thoughts. That's a very scary place to be for someone so young and it's important that you tell someone that you trust and feel comfortable with just how bad you're feeling. It's sometimes easier to keep it inside, but it's times like this that we really need a strong support system in place to help you through it all.

Will do. Will probably tell my doctor next time I see him. Do you think actually going to therapy and talking to someone would help? That's what my doctor recommended. He said that just even talking to someone about my concussion every week and getting it all out could help.

I do Sam, especially as you've mentioned having suicidal thoughts.

It will Sam.

Sam,

My worst moments have been associated with to much activity/ stimulation and lasted for several days after. Depression, anxiety very little sleep were the results. My wife could tell it was coming on before I figured out what was happening, I usually just sensed something weird taking place before it hit me full bloom. I am much better now and can tolerate much more physically and mentally.

Talking does help, I have had many a time over the last year that I break down in tears and let it all out to my wife. It really did help.

I also had some dark thoughts but God helped me through them and they have disappeared.

Bud

I'm re posting on this thread because I still am extremely worried, upset, and absolutely shocked at this point.


School is going to be starting up again soon and I am having massive panic attacks. This dreamy/numb feeling is ruining my life as we speak. I cannot seem to bare with this any more. 10 months of this constant symptom is making me insane. I cannot picture myself being able to do anything within school with this feeling. If I don't feel better before school I don't know what will happen. Probably a repeat of last year.

Getting bullied, made fun of, exclusion, etc.

Last school year I suffered it out and got D's and C's.


I have breakdowns and cry so hard over this a couple times a week. Every single day its there and I try to have strength and not think about it. But I just cant do it anymore.

I've tried every treatment you can think of, nothing has seem to really work.

Been getting into fights with my family because no one knows where to turn anymore. They think I am crazy and need to talk to someone.


This dreamy/numb feeling is always there. Its like a devil haunting my life. It started as soon as I hit my head and has NEVER gotten better since.


Hopeful that someone will have a new answer. But all we can do is 'hope' right?

Sam,

Can you get your family to take you to the concussion clinic at Mass general Hospital ? http://www.massgeneral.org/children/...s.aspx?id=1689

It is one of the best.

Looks good. But the question is would they be able to get me back to normal?


I will show my family this and talk it over with them. I'm willing to try anything.