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So I'm a 'software guy'...

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Old 09-11-2017, 11:48 PM   #11
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Software developer here.

I'm not sure how much my "head-incidents" have impacted the ability to do my job, but I will say that for me personally, it was better to take a light and steady workload rather than quitting my job or going on disability.

I have a phenomenal developer position that allows me to work my own hours and at my own pace (within reason). So, if I feel terrible during the day (which is every day!), I work at night. If I can pad 4-5 extra days into an estimate, I do it.
Basically, I game the system as much as I can to fit the job around my condition and not the other way around. I'm sure these actions stagnate my career growth, but I'm hesitant to advance until I start feeling better again...if I ever start feeling better again.

BTW, PCS or not, I never want to change code. Then again, breaking something is self-preservation as you need someone to fix the mistake. So, it's not all a bad thing. Then again, my company is dysfunctional; so who knows.
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Old 09-13-2017, 12:29 AM   #12
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I was a senior development manager when I had my car accident. This job required both technical coding and management overview on large projects.

My mind was foggy after I awoke in the car after the accident and I couldn't think clearly. I figure it was just another concussion (I had many over my life because of sports) and it would clear.

I started feeling better after a few days but then suddenly I had a panic attack (I didn't even know what it was until the doctor told me). I started having dreams with flashing lights and loud buzzing.

The doctor told me I need time to heal so the days turned into weeks and then months. I tried to go back to work and didn't remember my employee's names or projects names. I couldn't figure out numbers no matter how long I looked at them.

I am telling you this because of the next step. I could see that I need a plan and the doctor was going to get me out of this hole. I talked with my wife and told her that I could see only 3 paths:
1. I get better in time to save my job
2. I get better but not in time to save my job
3. I don't get better (I hadn't gotten any better at this point)

I then started going to Mayo Client brain center. They said I was too ill at that point to test. They started working on life skills to deal with some of my issues. I also went out on short term disability.

At some point, I took the test and failed. I had never really failed anything before so I started thinking this wasn't going to end well. I then had 6 more months of daily rehabilitation (each night the room would spin as I would go to sleep).

At some point, (sorry this point in my life is a blur) I had to apply for long term disability. I felt I was making some progress but nothing I could point out.

I got a letter in the mail saying that social security had found that I was disabled. This was a shock to me. I figured it would be some long process.

The insurance company was still trying to get me back to work. I was still trying to get ready for the next set of test. The day came for the test and I was hopeful that it would go better. It was the second biggest shock as I struggled with every test. The result was almost as bad as the first time.

The doctor told me I needed to start making other plans for my life.

The moral of the story is that I had the documentation required to apply for getting long term disability from the insurance company. You need to hope the best but also think that you might not get better.

You are older then I was and the doctor told me that was a big factor in my recovery (I had multiple concussion also was a big factor).

I know what is required to code and it takes most of the brain. I found that I lost my higher level math. This took me almost 8 months to figure out because I was dealing with so much. I have an engineering degree and MBA and can't help my son with his 6th-grade math.
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Old 09-14-2017, 12:23 AM   #13
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Originally Posted by packersrule View Post
I started feeling better after a few days but then suddenly I had a panic attack (I didn't even know what it was until the doctor told me).
How did this come about?
How long after the accident did this occur?
What did it feel like?

I had the exact same thing happen to me about 6 days after my trauma. I was sitting at my desk, bored out of my mind and all of a sudden I started feeling incredibly odd ocular sensations; like tunnel vision. That led to a feeling of impending doom and unexplainable tension. It was a HORRIFYING experience.

I immediately drove to a walk-in clinic...only to be told I was "running on all cylinders".
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Old 09-18-2017, 02:43 PM   #14
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Default I think everyone is different

I had some experience with basic programming, and minor IT support around our office (to fill in the gaps for when we couldn't call someone in). No formal training, just things I picked up over the years.

I tried for two years to continue on, recovering some of the things I lost in my accident (basic math among them), but no matter how hard I worked on it the executive function stuff just hasn't made a complete return. Every time I try to troubleshoot something, 20 minutes completely wipes me out, and sends me backwards.

I'm not saying this is the case for everyone. I think it really depends on what got damaged, and where you are in your recovery. I can't say this is forever for me, but I've finally recognized that this is not my "right now", and that trying to push it was only doing me more damage, personally and professionally. I can't tell you how often I've had times of clarity, only to discover that during a fuzzy time when I was pushing myself too hard, I messed something up.

And, I know what you mean about it being very difficult to explain what you do. It might be easier to let your therapists know the impact of using your executive function. For instance, I can clean my house for hours, but can only work for 5 minutes coding before I break into a sweat, and get the shakes. Telling them all the things that challenge you might help them correlate what areas are being tasked?
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