Hope you started with a bang today !

Force yourself to get on the scale. If it's a big bump up, console yourself with you'll be due for a big drop/successful first week or two on ye ol' diet and you can use that going forward......"Hey, self, we just lost 5 pounds in the first week of our renewed diet, we can do ANYTHING !"

I've been stuck on a plateau for awhile now. We are GOING to have frustrations moving toward a healthier self. The important thing is to dust yourself off and get back on the horse after each fall.

well I did not make it one day of not drinking....
I will some time soon.
I have to.
bizi

I actually made it to the gym last night felt good to be there. not as high of intensity as I was doing but have have to start some where, I still sweat so that is good, felt good to shower too!
Started off the day with a plum and a quarter of a cantelope that hubby chopped up for me. and 2 cups of coffee with liquid stevia to sweeten it. Plan on having a healthy lunch at my cafe with freshly steamed organic veggies etc.
It is friday so lets enjoy the weekend. no work planned Yeah first weekend off since our vacation. It is hot here already 83 degrees with 79% humidity!
HOT hOT HOT!!!!!
Every one stay hydrated if you are dealing with the heat.
Friday morning I weighed in at: 148 this morning. lunch was grilled salmon and kale and beets and rhutebagos. all organic and delicious!
dinner tonight was stir fry chicken and onions and peppers with mango currry sauce. and half an avocado. It was delicious too. ealier I had snacked on some smoked almonds and a bit of hummus and beanitos chips.I am still full and am getting ready for bed. But I am day 2 alcohol free until next friday(when we head to the beach for a couple of days and some bush whackers!) I hope I can make it that long.
wish me luck!
bizi

Just popping by to report that I have been alcohol free for 33 days. I had gained 10 pounds and have since that time lost it. I weighed this morning 144.5. Am happy about this.
Getting ready to have dinner of ground beef with egg plant casserole.
a favorite dish that I pick up at our health food store!
have a great weekend!
bizi

wolfie was banging on my door tonight!

Saturday, September 14, 2013

WEll it was more than wolfie, it was anxiety, awkwardness, feeling like a fish out of water, it was really uncomfortable.
It was the second saturday of the month.
ART walk in our community. 6-9pm art galleries open their doors and have free wine and snacks.
This is the first one that we went to in a long time. first one where I have not drank.
Instead I picked at some of the food at each gallery. Cream cheese and pepper sauce on a cracker or two. Then some cheese , then a couple of carrots, then there was chocolate 3 little dark chocolate dove squares. then some grapes.We ran into people that jeff knew and that made me uncomfortable to just stand there. I do have social anxiety issues.
Saw some really great artists work.
Then watched for a bit some out door artists actively creating images on a projector to display on the side of a building so we could watch, 3 different artists side by side. It was really creative.
I felt much more comfortable being out of the gallery's and outside. all of the anxiety disappeared.
wolfie disappeared! I am still sober and feeling great that I turned down the free wine because I don't drink any more....easier said then done.
but I survived.
Hubby did not understand my anxiety. I tried to explain and he listened.
It is hard to explain to someone who doesn't have a problem with alcohol or social anxiety issues.
calling it day 34!
bizi

at times sweet friend one situation at a time
even then it's not enough
remember we need to stay in the moment

someone that cares

thanks eva, staying present in any given situation is so important. I have been using my gps more frequently around towns, I travel around a 30 mile radius from my house and sometimes am not sure about getting from one point to the other. I just plug in the address and magically I get there.
I am learning to trust this technology.
I have been listening to npr for the news this past week....I had stopped listening to the news because of the presidential elections were getting so bad(I did not know who to believe).....I have found out that I have missed alot of important information concerning our foreign affairs. I don't read the newspaper. and listen to fox a bit when I make home visits.
Not so sure that we have any business getting involved with syria....is the USA giving the rebels weapons?
Some how your post to me mustered up these thoughts for some reason.....
still sober day 35.
good night
and thank you for your interest in my thread.
bizi

Hey Bizi
No coincidence
and a belief system
You make me stronger
Don't stop
A promise I must tell you
Keep it going
The obsession DOES LIFT
and you now have a shoulder
Sleep with angels

Someone who cares

thank you again eva!
wanted you to know that alffe is my mom on the suicide forums, she helped to start that forum many years ago some time after my only brother killed himself. It was her only source of support, besides her family. Peter was a brave soul who suffered with suicidal thoughts his whole life, he taught her how to live again. He dies of natural causes as an old man. There are comforting words stickied to the top of the forums page if you are interested.
make it a great day.
bizi

Well I have been getting up earlier in order to have time to read the local newspaper. and I have been listening to NPR radio for more news and commentary thru out the day. I made it to the gym last night and
walked a 5 K, 3.2 miles in 64 minutes at 3 miles an hour. So I feel good about that. I have made it thru 60 days alcohol free this time around. It has not been hard so am happy about that. I weighed 143.5 this morning, I fluctuate so much but happy to see that number this morning.
Trying to limit my computer time.....that is my biggest challenge, I avoid my paperwork that needs to get done.
But I keep trying. JEff is visiting a friend out of town tonight so that will be a challenge for me to NOT BE ON THE COMPUTER!
Make it a great day!
bizi