Hi Bizi
 

Just do the best you can do Bizi. I think your effort in doing the right thing for yourself is wonderful. Don't give up or give in. Keep on keeping on.
Worked in the yard this morning pulling up mexican petunias. I hate that plant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:( they spred like any other weed, and the roots go down 8 inches. I think I got the last of them. Already inside ready for a shower, then I read my book. Good day, and I hope yours is too. ginnie

I lost 7 inches in one month!
 

Well I was afraid that my binging would have derailed my weight loss efforts but it did not.
I measured myself, in one months time I lost 7 pounds and 7 inches.
I think that is amazing to me!
I ended the month of May with 25 days alcohol free and 6 days of drunk days. sigh
I had my mammo gram yesterday and she called me thin which was really surprising to hear. I don't feel thin as I have this belly fat that makes me look a bit pregnant. But by measuring that number is going down as well. So my low carb dieting is working. Along with exercising: tred mill for 30 minutes interval makes me sweat.
June is a new month.
I am AF 4 days so far and hope to remain alcohol free until the end of june when we go on vacation.
my goal is to try to be moderate in my drinking then and not have any Drunk days(5 drinks or more).
Goal for today eat well and go to the gym. My yard is calling me, need to work in some yard time.
bizi feeling pretty good today!

When I got home from work hubby was not home yet. He went out with some buddies for a beer sampling tour. So I wondered what we were going to do for dinner. WE had not discussed this earlier in the day.I had forgotten to pick up my prescriptions so I went to the store and waited until they were ready. But I was fixated on these blue berries. I picked up a pint of them and ate them while shopping around a bit. I ate the whole thing. It cost $3.50. I figured that I would have spent that on a good beer so what the heck.
Came home and now jeffs car is here but jeff is gone. I look at my phone and see I missed a text from him. He is at another beer tasting gathering just down the street with some friends of ours.
These are our good friends that we always drink with. They invite us back to their house for a quick dinner.We agree to go over.Their daughter is fixing grilled cheese sandwiches and califlower and big tater tots.

So on my way over there I am thinking....
hmmmm
There still is some left over margarita mix from easter, when I drank a liter by myself.
I could drink that since I am blowing my diet to night.
Then I thought:

I don't have to drink.
I don't want to go back on my promise to myself that I would not drink until vacation. And one day of overeating is not going to derail my dieting efforts.
I drank water, no ice....and had a good time.
They all drank and it was ok....I was ok.
I survived.
bizi

celebrated!

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

WE closed on the refinancing!!!!!
Got a great interest rate: 2.625%, paid off the student loan, got out extra money so that we can work on the house a bit, change the bed room floor carpeting to laminate floors. Hoping to change up my hubbys bathroom and get some new curtains for the living room and dining room.

any way.
neither one of us felt like cooking so we decided to get dressed up and go to a new restaurant in town. Ruffinos.
It was delicious!
There was over an hour wait so we sat at the pizza bar right in front of the chef who prepared appetizers and salads. we could watch about half of the dinner preparations going on.
WE thoroughly enjoyed the view/entertainment.
the food was delicious!
She started us off with this crusty bread and olive oil and garlic paste and cheese, it was delicious. WE ordered the seared tuna with soy caviar served on a hundred year old salt block!
Then we ordered oven roasted oysters which were very good! Jeff ordered shrimp alfredo and I ordered the new orleans style BBQ shrimp, which was heavenly! It was a bit peppery and lemony enough sauce to soak up your bread which I ordered another loaf and ate by myself... Finished dinner off with complimentary cotton candy. What a treat and I am so full. WE will definately go back at sit at the "bar" again. I remained alcohol free.
No guilt just happiness.
bizi

I am hovering around 140 for a while now, still watching what I eat. going to the gym tonight.
have lost 10 pounds in 6 weeks and 10 inches, measuring 8 places.
I bought some new clothes for summer, had gift cards left over from christmas. Went to dress barn and then khols. Found a really cute dress on sale, everything was on sale at khols. not at dress barn, bought a pair of shorts and a top for $53.....khols I bought a dress and 2 tops and some chocolates for $52 dollars.
WE are going on vacation, leave this sunday be gone for 2 weeks. hoping not to derail my dieting efforts and hope to stay moderate in the drinking department. wish me luck.
bizi

I won tickets to an event from answering questions on face book. Our town has a summer long marketing campaign called "eat Lafayette" The kick off party was tonight. 73 local restaurants come together and promote eating locally. So they had this party tonight from 5:30- 7:30.
WE got there right at 5:30.There were probably 30 different booths set up with food samplings.
I did not sample them all but I did eat a lot.
There were crab cakes and crawfish enchiladas, stuffed mushrooms, BBQ ribs, tabouli, hummus, duck and sausage gumbo, pasteries, mahi mahi mango nachos, seafood crepes. WE ate for an hour. Needless to say I am very full. Uncomfortably full and it is 3 hours later and I am still full!
There were free alcoholic beverages there but I stayed away from those majitos....
I wore my new dress that I bought from khols on sunday. (I hate shopping but felt like I needed new clothes for our vacation so I had 2 gift cards left over from christmas, dress barn and khols) It was form fitting and I looked good in it, while I held my stomach in. By the end of the evening there was not any ability to hold my stomach in...so I looked pregnant. OH well.
It was delicious food. Fun for hubby and I and it was free!
22 days but who is counting? http://assets3.sparkpeople.com/asset...icons/e334.gif

What fun! If I still lived down there that sounds like something I would want to attend. I love love Cajun food! Now you've got me missing even more the homemade sausage I used to buy at Bourque's grocery store in Port Barre. Even after I moved to Natchez Mississippi I still drove down there for sausage.

Good for you, Bizi, for staying away from the free booze!

WEll I started drinking again and have not really been dieting and I see it in the scale this morning...143 up 3 pounds.
sigh
bizi

just got back from vacationing...very afraid to get on the scale.
much eating and drinking ensued.
bizi

back on the wagon again....and starting to reel it in. restarting dieting and not drinking today was my last drinking day. So july 22nd is day 1.
Still afraid to step on the scale!
bizi

Hope you started with a bang today !

Force yourself to get on the scale. If it's a big bump up, console yourself with you'll be due for a big drop/successful first week or two on ye ol' diet and you can use that going forward......"Hey, self, we just lost 5 pounds in the first week of our renewed diet, we can do ANYTHING !"

I've been stuck on a plateau for awhile now. We are GOING to have frustrations moving toward a healthier self. The important thing is to dust yourself off and get back on the horse after each fall.

well I did not make it one day of not drinking....
I will some time soon.
I have to.
bizi

I actually made it to the gym last night felt good to be there. not as high of intensity as I was doing but have have to start some where, I still sweat so that is good, felt good to shower too!
Started off the day with a plum and a quarter of a cantelope that hubby chopped up for me. and 2 cups of coffee with liquid stevia to sweeten it. Plan on having a healthy lunch at my cafe with freshly steamed organic veggies etc.
It is friday so lets enjoy the weekend. no work planned Yeah first weekend off since our vacation. It is hot here already 83 degrees with 79% humidity!
HOT hOT HOT!!!!!
Every one stay hydrated if you are dealing with the heat.
Friday morning I weighed in at: 148 this morning. lunch was grilled salmon and kale and beets and rhutebagos. all organic and delicious!
dinner tonight was stir fry chicken and onions and peppers with mango currry sauce. and half an avocado. It was delicious too. ealier I had snacked on some smoked almonds and a bit of hummus and beanitos chips.I am still full and am getting ready for bed. But I am day 2 alcohol free until next friday(when we head to the beach for a couple of days and some bush whackers!) I hope I can make it that long.
wish me luck!
bizi

Just popping by to report that I have been alcohol free for 33 days. I had gained 10 pounds and have since that time lost it. I weighed this morning 144.5. Am happy about this.
Getting ready to have dinner of ground beef with egg plant casserole.
a favorite dish that I pick up at our health food store!
have a great weekend!
bizi

wolfie was banging on my door tonight!

Saturday, September 14, 2013

WEll it was more than wolfie, it was anxiety, awkwardness, feeling like a fish out of water, it was really uncomfortable.
It was the second saturday of the month.
ART walk in our community. 6-9pm art galleries open their doors and have free wine and snacks.
This is the first one that we went to in a long time. first one where I have not drank.
Instead I picked at some of the food at each gallery. Cream cheese and pepper sauce on a cracker or two. Then some cheese , then a couple of carrots, then there was chocolate 3 little dark chocolate dove squares. then some grapes.We ran into people that jeff knew and that made me uncomfortable to just stand there. I do have social anxiety issues.
Saw some really great artists work.
Then watched for a bit some out door artists actively creating images on a projector to display on the side of a building so we could watch, 3 different artists side by side. It was really creative.
I felt much more comfortable being out of the gallery's and outside. all of the anxiety disappeared.
wolfie disappeared! I am still sober and feeling great that I turned down the free wine because I don't drink any more....easier said then done.
but I survived.
Hubby did not understand my anxiety. I tried to explain and he listened.
It is hard to explain to someone who doesn't have a problem with alcohol or social anxiety issues.
calling it day 34!
bizi

at times sweet friend one situation at a time
even then it's not enough
remember we need to stay in the moment

someone that cares

thanks eva, staying present in any given situation is so important. I have been using my gps more frequently around towns, I travel around a 30 mile radius from my house and sometimes am not sure about getting from one point to the other. I just plug in the address and magically I get there.
I am learning to trust this technology.
I have been listening to npr for the news this past week....I had stopped listening to the news because of the presidential elections were getting so bad(I did not know who to believe).....I have found out that I have missed alot of important information concerning our foreign affairs. I don't read the newspaper. and listen to fox a bit when I make home visits.
Not so sure that we have any business getting involved with syria....is the USA giving the rebels weapons?
Some how your post to me mustered up these thoughts for some reason.....
still sober day 35.
good night
and thank you for your interest in my thread.
bizi

Common denomanator
 

Hey Bizi
No coincidence
and a belief system
You make me stronger
Don't stop
A promise I must tell you
Keep it going
The obsession DOES LIFT
and you now have a shoulder
Sleep with angels

Someone who cares

thank you again eva!
wanted you to know that alffe is my mom on the suicide forums, she helped to start that forum many years ago some time after my only brother killed himself. It was her only source of support, besides her family. Peter was a brave soul who suffered with suicidal thoughts his whole life, he taught her how to live again. He dies of natural causes as an old man. There are comforting words stickied to the top of the forums page if you are interested.
make it a great day.
bizi

Well I have been getting up earlier in order to have time to read the local newspaper. and I have been listening to NPR radio for more news and commentary thru out the day. I made it to the gym last night and
walked a 5 K, 3.2 miles in 64 minutes at 3 miles an hour. So I feel good about that. I have made it thru 60 days alcohol free this time around. It has not been hard so am happy about that. I weighed 143.5 this morning, I fluctuate so much but happy to see that number this morning.
Trying to limit my computer time.....that is my biggest challenge, I avoid my paperwork that needs to get done.
But I keep trying. JEff is visiting a friend out of town tonight so that will be a challenge for me to NOT BE ON THE COMPUTER!
Make it a great day!
bizi

thank you bizi
hope your day is filled with good things going on

thank you eva hope you are well.
bizi

Weighed 143 this morning down 13 pounds in 7 months. When I started drinking again I gained back the weight that I lost. now I am closer to where I was before....closer.....sigh

3-19-13=156, 5-17-13=145, 6-7-13=139.5 yeah!
8-1-13=148 sigh...8-8-13=151, 8-12-13=157.5 sigh
Starting new lifestyle 8-12-13: 100 day challenge, taking it a day at a time!
8-19-13= 148.5, ok I can do this. 8-30-13=145.5 yeah!
9-2-13= 150.5,9-6-13=147, 9-17-13=143 I fluctuate so much!
10-19-13= 143
goal weight= 135

I fit into my skinny jeans this morning! still have a pooch though, that should come off in time...(I hope)
bizi

ready to start a new month.
wolfie came last night. I sense of resentment...
."WHY CAN'T I BE LIKE EVERY ONE ELSE?"
I felt like 2 year old wanting something that I can't have. I still did not say anything to jeff because his response is just have a beer. I would have drank the six pack...sigh
After the treating hours were over we watched the birds movie, never had seen if before directed by alfred hitchcock. great movie.
then went to bed around 12:30, up at 8 but laid in bed until 9, no appointments this morning, on purpose. I am feeling lazy this morning, drinking some coffee, should go take a shower but want to reply to blogs etc. on line instead, more mental masterbation.
I made unhealthy food decisions last night. Did not have a dinner before trick or treating hours because we were busy putting on finishing touches to the house and applying our face paint etc. so I snacked on candy as it rained and had very few treaters who braved the elements. after 8pm we went to a neighbors house and by that time it had stopped raining so that was nice, he really decorates his house too but did not light anything up due to the rain so he was sad as well.
Went home and proceeded to have a carb feast: cup of ramen noodles and a big bag of popcorn...dinner at 10 pm!I must have had a dozen pieces of candy!
anyway I remained alcohol free and I don't usually eat like that. so today is a new month.
Will make the most of it!
Happy all souls day.
bizi

Just wanted to give you an update....Hubby is still practicing again, love it!
I am holding off in buying a new car.
(they told me they would give me $1K trade in value, it is worth more than that!)
I will just run this car as long as I can and replace the battery pack as I need to. Once it finally dies completely it will run on gasoline only and I will see what kind of gas mileage I get and decide then if we want to spend an extra 2K to replace the battery pack. It is a hybrid honda with only 100K miles on it so it should last a good bit longer. The thing is they stopped making this insight years ago so parts will be harder to find as it gets older. It is a 2002.
I love this car. As a trade in I drove a CRX model, which was just like the interior of this car so I was used to driving it immediately. What I would really like to have is an old CRX that has been fixed up! Maybe I could start looking for one? They stopped making them in 1991(I think).
Anyway
I finally made it to the gym last night
walked a 5K at 3 MPH for 64 minutes, feet hurt and the only reason I stuck it out was because I was watching the movie: ghost busters 2 silly movie! but kept me entertained for an hour while I ignored my feet and back that were starting to ache.
I weighed 140 this morning! I have more than 5 pounds of belly fat so maybe i need to adjust my goal weight of 135.
193 alcohol free days. this is the longest I have gone with out alcohol in I can't even remember when. I have taken breaks in the past but never over 90 days so this is amazing to me. I could not have done it with out your support. So thank you my friends!
bizi

WEll I had stopped counting once I got past 120 days....so decided to take the calender down and count....I am at 151 days alcohol free...that is 5 months. I was going to wait and let Belle tell me when I had reached 180 days....what the heck.
I am not hanging on to each number trying to not obsess with the counting.
It definately gets easier as time goes on but wolfie pops his head in every now and then.
Have to stay vigilant for him.
Maybe I will be brave to step on the scale tomorrow morning see the pounds that I have gained from my december month of feeding.
will see.....
have been chatting with some very nice people from all over the world at soberistas.
bizi www.soberistas.com

143.5 this am, a gain of 3.5 pounds, not horrible since I enjoyed a month of feasting!
bizi

good morning, I too need to get back on tract of dieting and watching what I eat. have put on a couple of more pounds...slowly creeping back up again. Have been eating these wonderful donuts int he mornings they are all gone now. clients have been feeding me, need to politely say no that I am on a diet.
But the scarey thing that I read last night is how sugar feeds cancer cells and more specifically can contribute to breast cancer risks. I knew that alcohol did this.
It was called an inflammation state.
It said that you can literally starve cancer cells buy keeping your insulin levels low by following a very low carbohydrate diet. So for people who have cancer they should be told this. Maybe the nutritionist are already telling them this. I have a friend that has throat cancer that has been thru 3 rounds of chemo and starting radiation soon. with once a week chemo for 5 weeks.
I feel sorry for him.
Chances are good that he will lose his salivary glands, and other side effects, could lose taste too. He doesn't want to go thru with the treatments. I really feel for him.
No sugar for this woman!
Today I start my diet again. and that means cutting out my sugary beers! So I am going to try to be AF until mardi gras. so it is back to day one. http://assets3.sparkpeople.com/asset...icons/e249.gif
I am drinking just half and half with stevia this morning, not my usual french vanilla creamer full of sugar.
bizi

Oh I love being on a low carb diet when we go out to eat at Dwights.
Our favorite restaurant.
Piping hot Char-broiled oysters with a buttery, slightly spicy cheeseyness that is delightfully sinful! First of the season. I had the crawfish ettouffe with cheese over mixed brocolli/califlower and carrots instead of a baked potato.
Jeff had 3#s of boiled crawfish with baby red potatoes and a piece of corn on the cobb.
They only opened last night for crawfish and we are so happy!!!!
bizi

weight has been up! awful!
Started on a new diet since wednesday the starting of lent.
"Giving up" alcohol and sugar.
I was up to 156!!!!!!
need to get serious again!
bizi

WE went to my friends house for St. Patty's day dinner.
I ate desert. a big piece of cho french silk pie.
Ate corned beef and cabbage and mashed potatoes and bread so ate a lot of starches tonight,
NOT ON MY DIET!
I have been doing really well and forgot that I was not eating sugar for lent. OPPS!
Honestly I forgot!
12 days of sugar free at least.
And I am still AF which is the most important aspect of this lent period.
WEll actually I am doing Belles 100 day challenge again. So am about 10% of my goal.
I have been chewing a lot of gum lately and it is very satisfying and keeps my mouth busy.
I was proud of myself saturday night.
By myself I went to a fabulous concert, Mahler's resurrection...awesome piece. 2 orchestras and two choirs.
very powerful!!!!
after the concert I went home and lamented...the computer was down.Jeff was working a gig...
What to do????
So I called my friend to congratulate her, she plays cello. She said they were over at the bar down the street, Brewski's. So I said I would join them.
There was a group of 8 of us. 7 musicians and me.
They all ate and drank...I drank water and did not eat, There the bar food is all fried foods and starch.
My cello playing friend has a trumpet playing husband who was there also.
He too gave up alcohol for lent so I hugged him good by and said stay strong. He chuckled.
These people are all very nice.
I went home and hubby came home shortly there after.
Sunday, we raked leaves 9 bags and containers full!
Our live oak tree did some serious shedding.
I did some paper work and billing.
Today I am sore from raking. My hands are not too blistered up, (I refuse to wear gloves).
So the day is almost over 10 pm and I am calling it day 13 down.
Will not weigh myself for a couple of days one day can't break a diet right?
I did not get pinched today even though I did not wear green, I forgot today.
Anyway it was a great day and even though I was offered a guiness I politely declined.
It was nice to visit with my friend and talk with her newish boy friend.
So I had a happy st. patricks day with out alcohol!
yeah!
bizi
I think I am down to 148 again!scrubs are fitting a little looser.

144.5 this morning! Things are going well, having a few sugar cravings that I have caved in...not horrible but still....
bizi

Hi Bizi
 

Home again, and I missed all of you and NT. Lost 12 pounds walking all over on my vacation. Stopped all red meat, ate no sweets, no dairy. Am back on track and down to a better weight. Keep up your good work with the diet. Walk more it works. ginnie

Hi, Bizi and Ginnie,

Both of you keep going strong. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

Mari

Hi Mari
 

Yes, you bet I will. I did experience a better way of eating on vacation. The lack of sweet stuff, plus all the walking, dropped the pounds off. I am blessed that without surgery, my ankle has healed after more than 7 years of pain. My son got me into some heavy physical PT on it. Had no trouble walking a long time up and down the cliffs of Negril. My all over pain, dropped a lot. Not sure why this occurred. I think our pace of life in America is much too much. Slow it down, relax, get good food and plenty of fresh air, and pain goes down. The neuro pain also diminishes. When the mind is at peace, the body heals. This is what I am learning.
Glad to be back Mari. I did miss NT, but nothing else of my life here. Didn't miss the rat race most of us have in our lives.
Take time each day to breathe deeply and to relax in the quiet someplace. Anxiety goes down too.
I hope you have been OK Mari. Are you feeling better? I did pray each and every day for the people I have met on NT. I told many Rasta, about NT, and what we do here on line to help others. We do have a community here that is precious.
Have a good day Mari. Will be back around the boards soon. xxginnie

congratulations on your weight loss ginnie and I am so happy for your decrease in pain. Wonderful news about your ankle.
you sound so happy about your trip.
I am happy for you!:)
my weight is up again because I have been drinking alcohol and eating poorly because of that fact.
I must quit and not be so out of control.:(
bizi

Hi Bizi
 

Thanks Bizi. Keep up eating good and drinking less. Where I was, was living hand to mouth, where you had to walk a good distance up and down the roads which are on a cliff in order to eat anything at all. I did this for each meal, or when I wanted a fruit snack. No dairy down there, or sweets unless you go to the hi-low store. I did the natural stuff, gave up red meat for good and all sweets. My legs that first week...thought I would die from the ache. I called what I was doing Goat training, goats are sure footed and agile. Buy the last week I walked up and down these stairs which are huge and uneven quite well with no stopping to catch my breath. I did some real hard training!!!!!!!!!!!
I am sick of being in pain and out of shape. Both are being corrected in every way possible. I dumped 4 medications down there too! My hands still ache, and my neck will never be good, but all and all a great deal better than what I was. Neuropathy in my ankles seems to have gotten a bit better too.
Get outside and walk Bizi, and do it often instead of the PC or TV in the evening. Americans live in their homes closed up a lot. In Jamaica, the people live and play outside most of the time, always very very active and so are the kids! No kid even comes in until dinner time. Swimming is every day for most children, again a very active type of life style. few have cars, so for the most part they walk. Americans can learn a few things from them which I did.

Keep up training, do the walking and the pounds will fly off you. Eat right, and your body will show it. I wish you all the best Bizi, as I too have struggled with the weight problem most of my life. I want to live longer, and be in better health to do so. I will keep you in my prayers. ginnie:hug::D

thanks ginnie,
You are a sweetie.
(((((((HUGS))))))
bizi

153.5 this morning.
ugh! the weight is rapidly climbing, I don't seem to be eating that much extra must be the alcohol.
bizi