HEALTH QUESTIONs & ANSWERs SESSION
>
> Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise
can prolong life; is this
> true?
>
> A: Your heart is only good for so many
beats, and that's it... don't
> waste them on exercise. Everything wears out
eventually. Speeding up your
> heart will not make you live longer; that's
like saying you can extend the
> life of your car by driving it faster. Want to
live longer? Take a nap.
>
>
> Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more
fruits and vegetables?
>
> A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies.
What does a cow eat? Hay
> and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a
steak is nothing more than
> an
> efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to
your system. Need grain?
> Eat
> chicken. Beef is also a good source of field
grass (green leafy
> vegetable).
> And a pork chop can give you 100% of your
recommended daily allowance of
> vegetable products.
>
>
> Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
>
> A: No, not at all. Wine is made from
fruit. Brandy is distilled wine,
> that means they take the water out of the
fruity bit so you get even more
> of
> the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of
grain. Bottoms up!
>
>
> Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
>
> A: Well, if you have a body and you have
fat, your ratio is one to
> one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two
to one, etc.
>
>
> Q: What are some of the advantages of
participating in a regular
> exercise program?
>
> A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My
philosophy is: No
> Pain...Good!
>
>
> Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
>
> A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!. Foods are
fried these days in vegetable
> oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How
could getting more vegetables
> be
> bad for you?
>
>
> Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from
getting a little soft around the
> middle?
>
> A: Definitely not! When you exercise a
muscle, it gets bigger. You
> should only be doing sit-ups if you want a
bigger stomach.
>
>
> Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
>
> A: Are you crazy? HELLO ...... Cocoa
beans! Another vegetable!!! It's
> the best feel-good food around!
>
>
> Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
>
> A: If swimming is good for your figure,
explain whales to me.
>
>
> Q: Is getting in-shape important for my
lifestyle?
>
> A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!
>
>
> Well, I hope this has cleared up any
misconceptions you may have had
> about
> food and diets.
>
> And remember: "Life should NOT be a
journey to the grave with the
> intention of arriving safely in an attractive
and well preserved body, but
> rather to
> skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand
- chocolate in the other -
> body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and
screaming "WOO HOO, What a
> Ride!"
>
>
>
> Hope this allows you to enjoy your
holidays more now that the story
> is
> told and it is ok to believe it until Jan 2nd!
>

Biz...that was funny!

The best info I ever read!