I'm having some moral dilemas with this diet of sorts my pseudo MIL send home with my S.O. For me to 'put him on'. Is it ok if I intrude here for a moment to ask questions? I sure could use some advice and possibly tips. Confronting the MIL is not an option, so I need a work-around.

I question the safety of this diet my S.O. had brought home (printed out by his mother, a doctor) and told me to put him on it.

While I try to understand his mother is a doctor, sometimes I cannot help but to ignore the "California" trendy advice I get, mainly because if everything in my fridge caused cancer I don't think I'd be allowed to buy it at stores. They say everything causes cancer now.

Anyway, cancer aside. I am taking the blame for his weight gain (I accept 80% for what I cook, he gets 20% for always being at work sitting or at home sitting). I am now being told to put him on this diet that appears to be unhealthy in my eyes.

This diet is called "The Mayo Clinic Diet" and what I found online, the Mayo Clinic did not, does not and never will endorse this. It's basically a list of weird stuff I am supposed to feed him every day for 14 days, taking two days off and then repeating until -I guess- he is up to their standards. This thing is saying he will lose 20 pounds every 2 weeks. I do not see this as being safe, something just seems weird. Not to mention, I have another special diet for a "3 day nutritional face-lift".

I hate to be the nasty person, I respect his mother but I think she's messing with his self-esteem and it's kind of ticking me off. He is a bit overweight, but he is healthy. I love him how he is, but I dislike the look on his face every time he visits his family.

I have looked up great healthy diets for him that I can alter to make high fat/protein, etc for myself. However, he has zero time to exercise thus causing 'issues'. His job requires him to 'crunch' at least 6 months out of the year (7 days a week, 12-15 hours per day). He is sitting down a majority of that time.

The other issue I have is that I need to gain weight, so cooking is a hoot at home. I have an 8 year old son who needs a 'normal' diet, I need to gain weight and my S.O. needs to lose. I am so lost, and this is really hard to juggle.

I honestly do not like the looks of this diet, one part of it says "Plenty of grilled steak" and basically says to eat it until you are VERY stuffed. Am I just not diet savvy? Is that normal? This diet is saying to stuff him (literally) on all of the foods listed.

How can I be expected to feed him eggs and tomatoes with coffee for lunch one day and eggs, spinach and coffee for lunch the next? That doesn't even sound very good. Why couldn't he just have a nice healthy salad and take a walk?

I really am trying to be understanding every time he comes homes with these 'natural' diet pills and bizarre diets, but I am not going to make him sick. And this diet does not look healthy.

I'm sorry for babbling, I initially wanted to just ask a question and then was struck with frustration which leaked out here. Sorry.

Any help, tips, suggestions would be more than welcome. Thank you so much for your time.

ellie, i don't endorse the mayo clinic diet. for many of the reasons they don't either.

3 of the best are weight watchers, south beach and dr phil.

dr phil is an easy lifestyle change. he has a 14 day quick start program.

south beach has the frozen and fresh meals besides the book. that makes it easy to not have to cook something different for him. pretty tasty too.

not sure if the ww would work for him. his schedule and meetings. but the point system is easy to follow.

i'll help anway i can.

Hi Ellie~
First of all--you're not intruding--jeepers, this forum is for everyone honey--glad you're here!!

Second--I'm just boiling here.

Your MIL is a doctor and she doesn't know that the only safe way to lose weight is about 2 pounds a week? UNREAL!!! I'm sorry Ellie, maybe confronting her isn't an option for you, but can I have a shot at her?? SORRY!! kinda

As a doctor she knows this, and as a MIL, why does she think this is any of her business? I'm not gonna get on the soapbox, cuz that's not what this is about, but, man, could I have fun with this one.....

You're sure between a rock and a hard place where cooking at home is concerned honey. Man, I'm gonna hafta put my thinking cap on for that one. Nothing comes to mind right away, other than making a regular meal for you and your kid(s) and substitute more veggies instead of gravy or low cal salad dressing for hubby. You could add more butter and sugar etc. at the table to your food to help you gain, or you have real ice cream and he could have sherbert. Wow, that's a lot of extra planning and work sweetie!

There are a lot of smart gals here. I bet if they all think about it they can come up with some good ideas and tips for you.

As for the safety of the diet, I'm definitely no expert, but we all know a well balanced diet is the only safe diet. If this so called "Mayo" diet doesn't look balanced, then I would say it wouldn't be good.

I go to Mayo tomorrow. I will ask my docs if they have heard of such a diet. They aren't in that department, but it diesn't hurt to ask. Have you checked their website to look if it's legit? I'll check later--I hafta go eat now--because of bloodwork.

I'm glad you posted and hope you get some good ideas. Hang in there honey--you are not wrong on this deal--your MIL is!
Hugs,
LS--(Little Sister) Nancy is older than me

This diet has been around for years!!! We used to call it the Grapefruit Diet...and yes, you can lose lbs. quickly but like all fad diets...it doesn't stay off. The minute you go off it the weight just piles on.



It's hard for me to believe that someone in the medical profession is still recommending this diet.

hehe alffe...bet you saved the link tho huh?

LOLOL! How can you know me this well???

You know Curious I actually have a very old copy of this diet in one of my cookbooks...probably James Beards...

Ellie,
I'll bet if he justs ups his H2O and does some short walks during the day {@ break times?} and phases out any "bad" stuff he may be choosing to eat {pop, sweets/salty, booze etc?} - I bet it may just drop off. It's proven {somewhere-LOL} that many short walks is as good as one longer walk.
maybe a pedometer?/ so he can see how many steps in a day and increase it little by little?

Men generally have a faster metabolism than us gals- their muscles are programed to burn more calories than ours.

I know if my hubby stops the beer/snacks and the skips a few big meals he trims right down. sickening. { errggh not fair -just doesn't work for me!}
He does walk a lot at work though too.

That diet MIL sent sounds like a fad type diet - not a lifestyle change.

Well guess I don't need to ask at Mayo if they've heard of the Mayo diet then, huh? I just gotta get outta my cave more......
Hugs,
LS

......He can lose weight by going on a strict diet...I think it was the grapefruit diet....... a half a grapefruit with every meal.
Then he ate salads, veggies and meat.
I think it is probably like the low glycemic diets out today.
Like the south beach diet or even Dr. Gotts no flour no sugar diet.
Another friend of mine lowed his cholesterol when he started eating MORE eggs.
He has 3 eggs every morning for breakfast. He also exercises everyday.
I have read that by eating more vegatables, fiber, nuts, protein, eggs, fish, cheese, yogurt, that they help to keep your blood sugars more stable because it takes a while to digest them....so the energy from these foods is more slowly released if that makes sense... Where as white flour foods start dissolving in your mouth and quickly raise your blood sugar and it is this quick raise that effects your cholesterol levels too. Also the quick raise and then drop is when we feel "hungry".
That is why it is so important to have some sort of protein thru out the day...to help keep our blood sugars as stable as possible so that we don't feel hungry. Also, I know alot of my elderly clients who don't eat enough protein that have problems with swelling/edema of the lower legs...the cell's there can lose itheir integrity and can't hold the fluid where it needs to be in the cell, so it leeks out of the cell into the space around the cell and can cause "pitting" edema...sorry if that is too much info....
Not only can this help me to lose weight but also because I can get hypoglycemic/ low blood sugar where I am just a crazy woman from waiting too long to eat something....My hubby doesn't like it when I get so crabby!
Fiber also is so important, I eat high fiber breads(natures own), tortillas(tortilla factory) and (kashi) high fiber cereal that also has added soy protein.
Did you know that soy beans are the only vegetable that is a complete protein all by itself? Soy is what they add to most diet foods with added protein.
I hope that I am not offending you with this information ...I just wanted to share some info if you did not already know the WHY'S to how protein works on stabilizing your blood sugar.

Again I am not a doctor and I am not advocating eliminating any particular food group...I just know from experience that for some people following a low glycenic diet can mean all the difference for them losing weight and lowering their blood sugars.

There is a great book called protein power by a husband and wife team, Dr. Eades.


I think that it does take a life style change and there really are no quick fixes....
it does seem that men can lose weight quicker than woman esp if it is being carried around their gut.
Good luck with this....

finally...
I would be upset too that she is involving herself in all of this....
bizi

Wow! Thanks so much for the replies. This diet does seem to fancy grapefruit. It requires grapefruit every day. Some of it just sounds gross. I mean, I've had some epic cravings but never have I wanted Spinach, Eggs and Coffee for lunch.

I really wish I could just find a way to get him to exercise. This is how he is, and I am dead serious. He bought one of those bowflex things and he used it to hang his shirts on for a year (prior to my moving in with him). It is now taken apart in my garage. I was working with a friend to make a pathetic attempt to set it up and put a mat out there with my therapy ball and the other miscellaneous exercise equipment. Turn it into a mini-gym, perhaps.

I am positive with a good diet, or even no diet - he could exercise and eat what he wants. They fail to take note that he is 6'3 and will never be a skinny/buff guy. Not to mention, standing next to me can't help much. I'm a little under 5'3 and my best weight was 116 when I was 7 months pregnant.

As a side note, my doctors have been trying to find out why I can't gain weight for the past 13 years. I was in my late teens when I finally grew insecure about being so small. It's really hard to address where I live because they expect all girls to want to be so small, but I know I am not healthy. It is abnormal for me to have to eat 6 meals a day and snack in between to maintain my weight (I have to really eat gross stuff and a lot of it to gain). I have tried to get them to 'fix me' because eating that much is literally painful, like - it hurts my stomach. If I don't eat that much, I will lose weight.

It's a horrible situation in my house, moreso when he is dieting - he's eating small portions or on restricted foods while I am shoveling stuff in my face. I feel bad, but I have no choice.

He is a manly man, so he likes home cooked meals. I couldn't even pitch the idea of the weight watchers meals or he'd laugh at me. I guess while he's not 'crunching' I can try my best to pitch at least taking walks with the dogs or something.

If I could find some contraption to attach to his desk that would be like bicycle pedals, that would be awesome. He could work and work out at the same time!

It's just hard to suck up feeling like I am being told how to 'raise' my own partner. He is an adult! I love his mother, she has done so much for me (gets me samples of my expensive meds, etc.) but it's hard to not say something to her when I know she's hurting his feelings. I know she wants him to be healthy, but I don't think she notices what emotional damage is being done in the process. It makes me feel very defensive and I feel protective when I see that look on his face.

Thank you all so much for your kind words and advice, I'm going to work this weekend on a plan.