[Brokenfriend]

I need prayer. I don't have the words to describe the cold feeling that my family feels for me. My dad has decided that he doesn't want me to visit him,and he doesn't want to hear my about my problems that I've had all my life.

My sister doesn't want me to come over,and she doesn't care about my condition,and said she's not going to help me. It's like they have both turned there backs on me. I haven't done anything wrong.I don't drink,or take illegal drugs. I was at peace with them,and I don't know whats happened.

I'm shocked. It's like they have passed a Judgement on me both together. I know that they both know that I am truly ill,but they have come to a point that they don't care. I have many emotional problems,that started with panic attacks when I was about 13 years old. Brokenfriend

[Abbie]

Brokenfriend,

You are in my prayers...

I sent you a kind of long reply to your post in the BP forum.


Please stay in touch with us... WE CARE!!


Abbie

[Chemar]

Brokenfriend I am so sad to hear that your family is not being supportive when you most need them. It's hard when you are suffering and others seem to shut you out. Sometimes, I have learned, it is too much for even people we love, and they shut themselves off from suffering of others because they cant cope with the emotions in themselves or their loved one. It doesnt always mean they dont care....it often means they care too much and cant handle the feelings it brings

praying you will always know you have a caring community here who will never judge and always listen and be here for you

[DM]

Hello Brokenfriend~ I agree w/Chemar's response. I think out of sight ~ out of mind... Maybe your family just cannot deal /your being ill, BUT that is no excuse for turning their back on you.

As Chemar said, we are all here for each other, so please know you are at home here.

[bluenurse]

Brokenfreind, You will be in my thoughts and prayers!! I agree with the above posts as well. Sometimes family shuts you out when they can not handle your problems. Time is sometimes a healer, meanwhile try not to waste your energy on changing something that you can't control. Let go and let God. You can talk to us, we listen.

[DejaVu]

I am saddened as I read your account and your concerns.

At the same time, my heart is gladdened that you have had the courage to bring this to your community here! This is a sign of inner strength, a sign of your feeling a part of the community here, a sign of your having some hope, etc.!!! (I am doing a happy dance for these aspects of your post!)

I do not intend to minimize your current sad (and likely infuriating) experience with your family members right now by sharing the fact that this happens so very often! I am truly sorry you have had this experience.

I have known of so many people with extra trials/burdens so quickly turned away from family, just when they'd thought needed their family most!
If family cannot handle some of your trials, then maybe they are not the persons you truly need right now to meet certain needs...although you had thought so?

It is so natural to want family to be able to assist us whenever we might need assistance; yet, family members are not automatically fully equipped to be the type of persons we truly need assistance from at various times.

Not all family members can handle any additional stress/emotions, as they may be overwhelmed with their own. This does not mean they don't love you! (As someone has mentioned above, it is likely they love you so very much...they may feel overwhelmed with how to help... or overwhelmed with their own life...they may be feeling very inadequate, as well?)

At different times in life, we free ourselves by forgiving both friends and family for not being all we'd needed them to be. We forgive them for their frailities, their "humanness," etc.

You have done extremely well at identifying a place/people you can turn to... by expressing yourself here! When we have needs, we can take really good care of ourselves by having our needs attended to... by reaching out to people able to help!

(Sometimes ... not always... but sometimes... going to certain people to have certain needs met...is similar to going to a gas station, when we need to pick up some protein for our dietary needs; we have looked to fulfill this need in a place it will not be met!)

I am encouraging you to continue to identify the people/places most likely able to assist you, just as you have done here!

It also may be helpful to clearly identify your current needs, if you have not already done so. Clarification of the need helps us to find the most likely way to fulfill the need! (It is akin to having a list when grocery shopping! We need to know what we need to pick up! And then... we need to get ourselves to the grocery store!)

In the meantime, I am continuing to lift you (and Sad One) up in prayer, meditation, also offering positive thoughts/energy on your behalf!

I will also pray for your family, hoping they feel strengthened and more open.
(However, continue to look for having your needs met where they can most likely be met! None of us can "change" others. We have to let go ...and let God! And then...we move on to meeting our needs!)

Oh... and I'd also encourage you to "communicate" with God or your "higher power," or however you feel comfortable... just as much as you can! If you are not now, strive to become very "conversational" and ask for comfort, strength, insight and direction as you go through your day!

Nurture a living, breathing everyday relationship with God/your "higher power!" This will make a huge difference n your life... every single day and night! This makes a huge difference in my life every single hour!

Keep us posted, as you feel led to do so!
I am always happy to learn as to how you (and Sad One) are doing, even when you are having a tough time! I see so many others also lending support to you here! This is wonderful!

Life will "look up!"

This community shows you so much acceptance and love! You are definitely and completey "worthy" of all of the love and understanding shown to you here! Try to remember this... always!

You are healing and learning more about yourself! We all strive to do this! People here are mirroring back your great value and inner beauty!

Lots of these (safe and supportive) hugs for you---->

Take excellent care! Stay in touch!

[Bannet]

I am so sorry to hear about your family. I wish there was something I could do.

There are so many caring supportive people on this forum. You will never be alone.

[Koala77]

I thank you for your post DejaVu. BF and I have both been going through some emotional family issues and he's been very supportive towards me, and I hope I have done the same for him.

I know your post was directed towards BF, but I wanted you to know that I gained from it as well.

Thank you DejaVu.

[Wiix]

Real life isn't like television. Your family can hurt you more than anyother people can. I sympathize with AND empathize what you're going through, been there and it Isn't fun. I really don't know what to tell you Bf. You just have to get through it and accept it. I know it's hard but we can't MAKE people care for us. I know you are heartbroken and feel betrayed but I can't say you will get over it. Some things in life we can't do anything about ESPECIALLY how other people treat us, not everyone is nice. I've Never known a Loving and supportive family and it's left a terrible hole in my heart but we have to deal with what we are dealt. I guess the word I said before applies, ACCEPTANCE. And move on from there.

[Friend2U]

I have said a prayer for your comfort at this time. I wish I knew how to do more... but there are so many people here at NT who care very much and that can be worth a lot. Just know you always have a place where there are folks who care. You are never alone! Don't ever forget that!