Quote:
Originally Posted by cat1234
Okay so maybe I tried to introduce too much food too quickly? I will try smaller snack size meals and see how that works. Right now I am so ill came home from my kids practice at 5:30 and crawled into bed. I contacted an ED therapist today but she charges over $200 a visit. After all we have spent on my medical bills so far it's just not something we can budget for right now. I will look into the state clinic next.
I have googled a million different eating disorder terms and there is just so much information out there-mostly repetitive. I am not finding anything quite as supportive nor as helpful as this forum. Mostly because I do not low if this is the problem or not.
My exercise has been curtailed the past few weeks as I am weakening. Usually I do either 30-45 mins of TRX training (like Crossfit without the barbells) or 60 minutes hot power yoga. And moderate walks with the dog. It sounds impressive for someone who says they are this sick but two years ago that would be just be one of my workouts for the day. Now it is painful to push though 10 mins of either and leaves me drained but it gives me an endorphin rush that temporarily takes away the pain.
I do see an obgyn. She is the only doctor who said I needed to gain weight. My paper come back normal but my hormone levels came back too low to be measured. Everyone is stumped on the menses issue. There is nothing left to be tested I guess??
The thing is I want to be hungry and enjoy eating when I am- but my appetite is rarely there this last week. The weird part is when I first started to try and eat without restricting a week ago I was really hungry and wanted to eat. Then it all reversed. And the neuropathy pain increased. Oh this is maddening!!!!! I just want to know if this is the cause or not before I waste more energy on another dead end.
Btw I had previously read most of your recovery thread and you are a true inspiration. I think one of possibilities of my issues may not only be malnutrition but "drinking my calories" for a few years. So I have found your posts helpful.... Just not sure if that is it either since I have not had more than one or drinks in the past year and a half and have not improved  |
Hi Cat,
Sorry, it took me a while to get back too you. I'm really happy to hear you have children. When you said you haven't had a period in 21 years I thought you may have had trouble conceiving. How old is your child/children?
I don't think you mentioned if you have health insurance or not. If you do, call the number on the back of the card and ask them for the names of counselors who will take your insurance. If you do not have insurance get the list anyway. If money is an issue many counselors will charge on a sliding scale bases on salary.
As for your exercise, that is quite a bit for the amount of calories you take in. I know cross fit is extreme exercise. I have never done hot yoga but have heard it is difficult. I was very into working out before I got sick. I was at the gym 4-6 days a week for 2 1/2 hours. In order to be that active the body requires much more than normal in the way of calories.
I have found in practice that doctors are extremely reluctant to speak to their patients about weight. As a school nurse, most of the doctors I spoke with concerning a students weight requested I speak with them and their parents about it. I have never understood why. I applaud your GYN for addressing it.
Did the fertility specialist mention it? That's one of the issues they usually address. I suspect, if you were this thin for years it was probably the cause for your periods stopping or at the least it should have been looked into.
I believe you do want to be hungry and enjoy eating. This is an extremely difficult situation your in, those words are not powerful enough to even describe the situation, but it's all I can think of right now. Your words were good, it is maddening.
By saying you have taken most of your calories in liquids, did you mean alcohol. If so, have you gone on the searches here to see what supplements you may need. There are people here that can help you with that.
If you want my opinion, I do suspect, you suffer from an eating disorder. I would definitely see someone. Possibly your GP. Don't wait for him/her to bring up your weight. Make weight the reason for your visit. Perhaps they can even point you in the right direction for counseling. As I said before though, it is not for me to diagnosis.
I don't know anything about your life circumstances but this is sometimes the reason eating disorders occur. Weight is one of the few things we have complete control over when everything else seems to be spiraling down around us.
Did you read about the connection between neuropathy and anorexia. It is interesting. I was not aware of the connection.
I hope this helps a little.
Hopeful
