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Originally Posted by markneil1212
after 9 years of brain injuries the loss of my money my job my house most of my family and all of my friendsalong with the terror of falling asleep which means I'll wake up with my body convulsing and shaking and burning in all different directions has made me kind of docile .the fear that my heart might stop because of my weight and because ofthe spasms and contractions when I wake up is there. I'm 46 over 300 pounds and when I wake up with those spasms and tremors it is heavy burden on my heart and I don't know how long my heart with the thick walls will hold out. I was scared but now I'm like if there's a God great and that there's not I wont know cause I'll be dead. I'm more scared of being alive and having the chronic seizure are tremors or whatever the hell they are. I hope all of us can lose all of our fear and have peace amen
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Mark,
In your last sentence " lose all of our fear and have peace" really hits home to me. Because of the last several years of pain and suffering, I actually am looking forward to, as I put it, "going Home".
This has given me a sense of peace. I think many of us do not fear death as much as the fear of terrible pain near the end. Putting all that aside; what is the worse that can happen?
Until then, I will do the best I can to figure out what I can and cannot accomplish with my limitations, allowing me to enjoy my life as it is now and not what it was. For the most part; I have a sense of peace and not fear.
Mark, may peace; not fear be with you.
Gerry