If he was in a closed building with the motor running then he could get carbon monoxide poisoning.

Was the wife or a family member home??
Suggest they take him in the house?
And take away his keys....
I would be concerned he might wake up enough to try to drive
Or call police to check on him...it might get him on the road to some help or a wake up call anyway...
I don't know if sitting in a running car & being drunk as a skunk is legal or illegal- cops might think it is illegal as person might try to drive.

Well, it's the next day, and I just walked around the corner and the car was still there and there was NO ONE in front or gossiping (so that's how I know somebody put him inside the house).

Now I have a dilemma. Do I tell the wife? She's a very nice woman who is dealing with a great sadness ever since 9/11. They never got over this loss.

But is it my business to tell her the next time I see her (Hey guess what happened? I found your husband dead drunk in the car).

I don't think anyone would welcome such a piece of news. I know how to speak to a person. I definitely know how to talk as to not to make some one uncomfortable. But I risk her being so embarassed that she'll just walk away and might never speak to me again.

She's a very very nice person who has had to deal with such loss.

I don't want to add to her dismay. She knows her husband is an alcoholic. They all are in that family. They are always bringing home cartons of beer. I see this all the time.

But is it MY business to stick my nose in to someone else's business.

They might say "oh go f yourself, it's not your concern"

See my dilemma??

I once saw the wife coming home from work (she's a para in a school). She parked the car (I was watching to see if she had one too many). Sure enough she staggered just a bit. I know her, I know what she does. I know what she drinks.

But you should not drink and drive. Of course I know this.

She looked at me, smiled and we had a perfectly normal conversation.

Actually I have never seen her when she is completely sober. With the school days over, I guess she has more time to take a nip now and then. I gather this is her right.

She has 2 sons left and a daughter and she has grandchildren who she adores.

But she and her husband are alcoholics and I gather they don't want to stop drinking.

I went to two funerals when her son died. One before they found his body, and one afterwards.

Such sadness in one family is overwhelming, this I know.

But people should never get behind the wheel when they are inebriated...this I know also.

I'm in a quandry here.

Any suggestions are welcome.

Mel

I'd just let it roll off your back. What if she already knows? You never know....

The drinking part is a separate issue, since it sounds they all drink in the family.
It's the drinking/driving issue that is more of a concern to me.

If he or anyone was that drunk and walking the street carrying a gun what would you do?
Just leave him alone or call police?
A car can be as deadly as a gun right?
That's how I would look at the situation if it happened again.

Innocent people could get hit & killed if he tried to drive in the condition he was in.
He might have just gotten home from somewhere or was planning to go somewhere but passed out instead.

That's exactly what I think happened.
So do I tell the wife or do I just chalk it up to a happening that I witnessed and if it happens again, I'll ring the bell and say "uh, your dad is asleep and the car is on".

thanks
Mel

I think Melody that I wouldn't bother with the mentioning of it this time. She obviously knows. The next time though that you happen to find him in that position and not getting an answer on first tries I would quietly open the door, roll down the window if it is hot and turn off the car and ring the bell and let them know or if it is late put his keys in their mailbox. He may have to beat on his door or ring the bell a few times to get in but that is better than him coming to and driving off. Then the next morning just go over ring the bell and very calmly and keeping it brief say I put your husband's keys in the mailbox because I was concerned for his safety and the safety of others. Make his safety first so they will take less offense even if that is not really how we feel. Called soothing egos. Don't stick around, I am sure they will be embarrassed and do not want to confide and will appreciate your discretion.

Wow, Christina.

I never would have thought of doing what you wrote.

How kind of you to explain this whole Soothing Egos to me.

I just passed their house and the wife and son were on the porch. We chatted briefly. I mentioned nothing. I haven't seen the guy for a few days.

So it's their private matter and I would never intrude.

But thanks so much.

If it DOES happen again, I shall do exactly what you wrote.

Thanks so much for the lesson.

I learn stuff every day on these boards.

Stay well.

Mel