Hi:

I was a division I basketball player in college and the moved on to fencing in recent years. This is my first post here. In 2005 I had a stroke that turned out to be a fusiform aneurysm in my basilar artery. Hard to reach and a nasty aneurysm. I was flown to Barrow Neuro in Phoenix and they stented me. dandy, I am all fixed. I have my angiogram follow up in 2007 and am told that not only is my first aneurysm growing again, but I have also grown a new one right above it.

In the summer of 2007 I had a craniotomy and STA to SCA bypass.

In September 2008 I had my first seizure. A couple of weeks ago I had another stroke. Once again I was flown to Barrow and after my angiogram they said they wouldn't recommend surgery at this point to do another crany and shut down the basilar artery once and for all. I have my three year scheduled angiogram next summer and Dr Spetzler said if the aneurysms keep growing or I have more incidents before then that I might want to "Bite the bullet" and have it done.

I am now totally freaked and cannot think of anything but fencing again and my brain. I am afraid to do anything that might mak them pop. How do you tell if they are leaking? I am scared to death and can think of nothing else. I have a wonderful caregiver. But I hate to say it, unless you have gone through it, only you can know what it is like. I am going crazy.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Dear Fencer,

I do apologize, but am unfamiliar with the disorders you mention. Am SO sorry that you are going through all this, and I can see where you would be totally freaked out. The thing I do identify with is your substantial losses in ability to do things you love. I am grateful for your caregiver! I would not try fencing at least until you can consult your doc on the matter. I am sure that someone will come along that can answer your questions. There are so many people on this forum with superior intellect and knowledge in these matters. You are in the right place. Don't do anything to harm yourself further, but try not to dwell on it. The Lord Jesus heals! Find your quiet center and live out of there. Caring About You ~ billie

Hi SDFencer,
What a crummy course of events. Like you I had the surgery and am in "the watch" mode on an aneursym. That's where we part company. I had a brain aneursym that has been clipped. It appears to be permenently fixed, but after reading your post I have my fingers crossed. I'm watching a 10mm carotid aneursym. I've had mixed medical advise on getting it treated, but was consistly told to have it clipped if it grows or I develop symptoms. You are definitely in a tighter spot, but I have some idea how you must feel. At first I thought about a rupture constantly. I do avoid heavy lifting or things that would raise my blood pressure. I don't know how it goes with you but I have gone from fearing my future, to being glad to still be walking the earth, and back again when I start dwelling on things.
Seems like it's becoming a judgement call of risk vs benefit as far as your surgery. It sounds as if you have a good doctor. Ask a lot of questions . I had my surgeon describe what I could experience if mine ruptured and, even though I found out it would be bad, it made me feel much better. I don't do well when I just start wondering. You can't deal with facts until you know them. Guess knowing them made me feel better mentally prepared. Hopefully some one who has had a similar aneursym rupture will answer your post. They may be able to give you a better idea on what might happen- I assume head/neck pain. You have my sympathy for this on going mess you have with that artery and being stuck in limbo for another year. It must stink- to be polite. Vent here as needed.

Thanks you guys. Like I said, you guys get it. I can deal with dragging my right side a bit and slurry speech, but I don't want another craniotomy. I am an information guy and I am afraid I am getting some "freshmanitis" and experiencing everything bad.

People tell you "well, it beats the alternative." How do you know?" Like the book title says "We Plan, God Laughs." (Old yiddush proverb) I am just scared of the unknown and uncontrolable I guess. What a baby