hey, as i started a thread on the last board, i would like to know what pros and cons people see thier child/themselves as having due to autism. it interests me because not anything is just BAD. i relate to myself as having some good qualities that i can attribute to base defects of autism like my ability to engourge myself in thought. to emerse myself in my interests and evoke my abilities of thinking outside the box to see things in a new light.

heck in technicallity everything that is a pro is a con too. my wife likes how i think but sometimes she feels put out from me when i don't interact inside reality sometimes. i don't mean to it is just really fun to think my thoughts and run around perplexing ideas and things. while me and her utilized my logic bound thinking to reorganize our bathroom with products in places based on type of product and usage of product while having an overlying factor of the products access time (meaning how often will the product be used and in what type of frequency?).

see pros and cons to everything, the logic that is me helps and hinders. anyone else have any nifty examples?

I couldn't agree more with your pro and con beliefs.

There are so many I could relate to aspergers, I wouldn't know where to begin.

I'd say this would apply to both my childhood and adulthood...

I've heard many new wives or mothers saying how 'lonely' they feel. I haven't felt lonely for a second since my husband and I got together. When you're used to weeks and months and years of isolation (other than when you manage to force yourself on a person reluctant to acknowledge you, but just being 'nice') seeing someone every single day, wow! That's a heck of a lot of company. He drives a truck, I'm sort of an out of sight out of mind gal. Not so much with the kids though, cause you know, they're more fragile and whatnot. And that's another thing, kids - talk about NOT having lonliness. I realize a kid isn't the same as an adult for companionship, but it's a hell of a step up from a fish!

So, my pro and con, was lonliness....I had a lot more of it due to no family or friends, and there were many years (high school years) it was more mental torture than a prisoner would even get. But, now that I have companionship, I am fulfilled far easier than perhaps someone that was popular in high school for whom two screaming kids and an ocd husband might be a bad thing.

Actually, I remember complaining to myself and here about TOO much companionship, not enough alone time quite a bit. Then, one thanksgiving maybe 4 years ago, I had to drive out to get something. While on the road, I saw all these people in their cars, also driving alone...I presume to relatives houses. I felt SICK. It hit me, that the reason I so crave more time alone, is cause I don't have it and have the security of knowing I was driving back to my family. I don't really think I've wanted to be alone a lot like I did, since. I think, "how would you like to have it like it was, single, no kids, fish and birds". Nope.

Ok, so my pro and con answer is lonliness.

It's human to analyze your mental processess, your attitude, behaviour, aspirations to be 'perfect'... even more perfect the next moment...

Wouldn't be great to live the moment like a newborn full of wonder and joy? and never rehatch over those 'bad' moments of the past?????? Would you feel less human?

my friend who has autism (severe like around 47 IQish but i think he is more anyway) doesn't seem to do well outside of his routine. so learning new things for hiom is quite difficult. but luckily one of his routines is to talk to himself and others in short spurt sentences like "Don't touch a knife". well he likes to make jokes like "Don't touch a deer". and pretty much repleace deer with anything and he will have a big smile on his face. "Don't touch a car" or "Don't touch a light". but the reason he has these little short responses seems to be his involvement or interactions with how he is processing the currect environment. when he is playing his video games he says to himself "Got to read the question twice." i started that one for him. but eventually it stuck. the reason why i had him start that was because i fonud out that he was playing who wants to be a millionaire video game at home (i bought for him) and he was getting a million dollars. well he was only remembering the answers and the order of the answers (ie ABCD) so when he would play the game he wouldn't read the question. and he would still get a million dollars. like he had a photographic memory! i tested this by putting my arm in front of the questions and had him keep playing. he would still win without hearing or seeing the questions! so i said got to read the questions twice with him for a few weeks and now he says it on his own. so he likes learning new things but it takes a bit and it has to be something he likes. like i tried to get him to eat his vegitables one day and man i might as well of eaten my own leg cause there was no way he was going to do that. and sometimes that is the way it is. he just won't do something and that is that and he has made up his mind no changing it.

so pro here is his capacity to learn and remember things. con is it is only things he likes and wants to learn.

I never thought of it as bad...just the opposite! I was always fascinated and was attracted to my husband because of the unique qualities he possess. He woo-ed my with a rubics cube. That tells you how old I am.

My son is fascinating as well. I wish I could get inside his head more so I know why he mimics (echopraxia) others. I don't know if he is doing it as a motor tic or for learning socially.

I would have to say the only thing I don't like is the tantrums. I could do without those. I got bit a few weeks ago and he took his rage out on me. I am his safety net and so I think that is why he lashes out. I am never mean to him or pushy. We have a great time together for the most part but when he has a bad day it comes out on me.

I am fascinated by his musical ability. He tells me not to sing because he knows how out of tune I am. I am his biggest fan.

He seems to like Math alot (he is only in first grade). My husband is great with numbers too.

Pros - the mind is fascinating and I think it is amazing how you can tap into parts that create genius.

Cons - Temper tantrums and agression and feeling like you are walking on eggshells all the time.

Obsessiveness can also have pros and cons

pros are you end up being great at something
cons - it will drive you nuts because you obsess over things and your mind won't stop

I can really relate to you M&mikey!
I am married to a wonderful man of just over four years now and the more I learn about Autism I am convinced he is an undiagnosed high functioning ASD adult. He went through school in special ed classes and worked really hard to get his highschool with advanced courses and some OAC's. I am very proud of him considering all the help he recieved was some speech therapy and a very dedicated Special ed teacher who he still keeps in regular contact with. He is very talented in music and math and has a fabulous sense of humour however he can get emmersed in the computer, music, or T.V to the point where I am not even there...so to speak. I am working on getting past this and the times that he appears not to want to spend time with me or to be alone. There's the pros and the cons right there...
We have a wonderful three year old son diagnosed with severe Autism who is greatly improving every day but still the tantrums and frustrations to work through, not to mention eating with utensils, potty training,and increasing communication and social skills which is an on-going work among other things. Our son on the other hand is so loving, affectionate and happy expressing intrests in cars, trains, music and art. He is a true joy and there is so much potential in this young life!

I don't think I really expressed, how intensely and for how long I submerged myself in perseverating over this very topic.

There are just way too many examples to list, but truely, you cannot have a pro without a con, and visa versa. You can't feel happiness, without having felt sadness for instance, I mean, like I said too many examples to list.

Anyhow, just wanted you to know Mooseman, that this was a point of massive perseveration for a long time for me. (Not saying you're perseverating).

Another thought I enjoy tossing around, is "too much of anything is no good" and couldn't come up with a single acception to that rule. Too much love is obcession, too much oxygen and all the worlds plants would die from no Co2, etc etc... And nope, with so much more important things to think about, I have no idea why I have all these types of thoughts. It's like creating my own social conversation in my head, in which I am 'all' of the participants on my own philosophy debate team....kinda like a certain part of my brain is perpetually on pot, hee hee. And no, I don't smoke pot. I hardly need to!!!