Hi All, Haven't been online in a few days. Been a nervous wreck. I ran into my husband on Friday night he was drinking, and I left the place. He called me at 2am, then the next day at 4pm. Telling me he was coming to my house on Saturday to get the rest of his things with a friend. I said try it.

I called the police and filed a report, they arrested him, brought him to JAIL, and then yesterday (Sunday) he was arraigned via video and released on his own recognizance. He will now have a court date (I don't know when yet) to face the charge of violation of probation. I would think they would of kept him in jail until his court date. So, much for the justice system for Domestic Violence on Women.

So, I stayed in New Years Eve, I am afraid to leave the house right now. He had an extreme amount of anger in him, then he found out I had to put our
Savannah down, and flipped out saying I killed his dog. I am a dog lover and would NEVER do that unless necessary as the Vet said it was.

There is more, but This a just another nightmare. I don't think I will have to go to court, which I DON'T intend to anyway.

Happy New Year, Nikko

((((nikko))))

what a way to ring in the new year. i'm so sorry.

atleast the police did do something and arrest him. not the typical...just talk to him.

you did the right thing for savanah. if he can get past his anger he will see that.

Curious

Honestly, I was wondering when this was going to happen.

And I am frankly suprised they arrested him. Sounds like your town takes domestic violence much more seriously than they do here.

I would be freaked out too, Nikko. This will pass. Make sure to get to your DV counceling. Don't let him win. Don't let him get to you. He did this to himself, so he is going to have to live with the consequences.

YOU DID NOTHING WRONG. k?

HUGS baby girl

Thanks, I saw on the computer that it is in the database that he is in violation of a judicial proceeding, no court date or judge yet, but they sure did get that updated fast.

He is out of the database for a jail inmate, which I knew.

I am just really drained, I guess because yesterday and Saturday night I was a total wreck. I have no appetite, just drinking coffee and soda.

I do have to leave the house to go to the store at some point today, if even just a convience store right by my house.

Yes, he brought this all on himself, yet it will be my fault AGAIN. I am just afraid he will try and do something to my other dogs, to hurt me, God knows what he is thinking, he must be scared because they said he would go to jail if he violated any of his probation. Then again lets see, I have no faith in the justice system for DV on women. I assume he will get the same woman judge in the same courtroom, and she promised him jail if he violated anything.

The police told me to call his probation officer on Tuesday, I really don't want to get involved, I am sure she will find out.

Had trouble staying asleep last night, put the vacuum up against the door sideways. Yet he could of just broke the glass, or even on the sliders for that matter.

Anyway, he would be an idiot to do anything now, but he is full of anger and rage and is an idiot.

I did call my DV last week, she was on vacation and is supposed to call me this week, plus I have an appt. with my PCP.

I have to go lay back down, I have no energy whatsoever.

Hugs, Nikko

N ikko
I yhink with an idiot like him it is only a matter of time until he would violate...It is the Power of Control WHeel" they are on.

The thing with probation officer, there are two things going on, the police interaction with him for the violation of PFA, being incontempt, then second being in violation of his parole.

Thank heavens he could not get near you to hurt you physically. Had he just shown up and harmed you would be sick, SOB. HW tried to use the ruse to say get his things. BUT A NO CONTACT IS A NO CONTACT, he violated, his attorney is going to be livid.

Whatever sentence they gave him the probation officer comes into play to pettition the court that he violated and that is a second hearing for them to ask for his probation to be taken awy and serve out the original sentence.

That may be why the police said to contact them. If he had physically injured you and the level of assult were there, they would wake up the probation officer and have them come lock him up.

In my case there were a dozen violations, they would not prosecute, said he ws in the area, called on the phone, did not injure or kill me so get thicker skin.

I can bet the conversation his attorney is having is worth being a fly on the wall.
Nikko,
Be safe, know your surroundings, don't answer the phone let the machine pick it up....best evidance.
Big hugs to you,
Di

Nikko

I wanted to send you some hugs. I'm so sorry to hear all that
is going on. Wishing there was more I could say.

I'm here to listen if it helps.

Donna

Hi, Nikko,
Do what the police say. They know how the system works.

If G-d forbid there is a next time, don't share ANY information with him -- not about the dogs or anything.

I hope that you will be ok.

Mari

I guess I will call his PO tomorrow then. I didn't leave the house today, I will have to tomorrow though, at least then I know he will be at work, at least I assume he will be.

He probably won't even call his PO, she is really nice, I would think she would call him. Won't they let her know? I mean it's already on the computer, just no date yet or judge yet.

I wonder if when they brought him into jail (intake) they did a pee test, cause then they would of found alcohol, but I don't know.

I hate this. Just baking some pork chops and baked potato's for my mom, cause I doubt I can eat.

I just dozed on and off all day today.

Hugs, Nikko

I called Intake and asked the girl if they did pee tests on men when they come in, she said NO, only on women to see if they are pregnant.

Great, he gets away once again, they would of found alcohol.

I just got an email today from my FIL that my husband called him today to wish him a Happy New Year and my FIL said he sounded good, I guess all is well with him he said. If he only knew.

ughhhhhhhhhhhhhh guess he didn't tell his daddy yet.

My mom ate. I didn't, one of these days my appetite will come back.

Been on the phone with my girlfriend from back East, she knows him all to well and what happened back there too.

Next I will be hearing from my cousin, she hates him too.

I want to feel good again. Sorry for being such a downer.

Hugs, Nikko

Hey Nikko....

first.... ((((( huggs )))))

sorry this is happening... but i really need to second Mari's post here...

CALL that Parole Officer YOURSELF. Obey Police Instructions.

it doesn't matter if the PO will get the info anyway, through bureaucratic channels, if the POLICE told you to call, DO IT. There may be good reason for you and the parole officer to speak directly. Even if it's just a protocol thing, what's to lose. Keep your case clean.

AND yes... tell him NOTHING. You know, even if he talks to you, silence is an acceptable answer. Don't give him the time of day.

i wonder if your DV counselor knows if/how if it can be put on his file that if he is arrested in that he should be urine tested... due to the restrictions on his probation order.

I WANT YOU TO BE SAFE. Please take care.

Last but not least, I want you to eat SOMETHING even if you don't have an appetite. I bet you have a microwave and a potato. Nuke a potato and eat it. Just plain. eat as much of it as you can, slowly is better. Potato soothes the stomach and is something readily digestible to start with... you need to bring your appetite back. Another thing is grits, but maybe a baked potato is easier. Try it? Please??

((( hugs )))

~ waves ~