[Jim091866]

This past Friday I was out of my medication, zoloft. I take 200 mg every morning. I was feeling fine all day. We had been having some difficulty with our youngest daughter after she got into a car wreck (not at fault) while in a bad part of town. She now had been using our car and we told her she could not go over to this area to visit a friend. This was the scene a couple of days prior to my meds running out and my wife had remarked at how well I had been handling it, stating that she's nearly lost it herself. Well Friday night comes and my two daughters decide that they are going to have a discussion with my wife over her anxiety,depression and such. My wife suffers from agorophobia, can hardly go out of the house,etc. And they persist to tell her to get help,stop taking meds, etc., etc. Well, at this point I lost it. My wife is in tears. I told them that rent is now due-the one daughter moved back in with a bf 6 weeks ago at which time we told her $200 a month! Seen nothing of it. Furthermore told them theyre getting their own insurance policy as of Oct 1, we cannot risk their choices and behavior affecting our policy and liability. I even put this in a letter for them so they knew I was serious. Wow, they all hit the roof! Now they want to move out not go to school (college) any more, etc, etc. My reply was you'd better get good at asking "do you want fries with that." And all I did was miss 1 day of meds.

[bizi]

It is called setting up some boundaries of acceptable behavior.
They were ganging up on your wife it sounds like and you had had enough!
IT is your house, your rules....
bizi

[PAYNE1]

I think I'd have reacted like you did even if I had not missed taking my Zoloft! You were obviously coming to your wife's defense, since you felt like your daughters were ganging up on her. So, you were mad at them--and while you were at it, you remembered that you had other reasons to be mad at them. To me, as a mother of a college-aged son who was at home this summer without a job, your reaction was understandable. Maybe the lack of Zoloft didn't help, but I'm not sure just one day would matter that much....

[Jim091866]

I let my wife see my post, she agreed it pretty much summed it up, lots of stuff in the middle but you get the gist of it. THEN I showed her your responses and now I've left stuff out, nada, nada. I may have gone off but I guess I can compare it to a forest fire. If its hot and dry, don't go throwing a match. The pharmacy gave me a choice to pay for some zoloft until I could get a refill. Wife said no. I know not to miss one @#@##$ day of meds. Not one day.

[waves]

Dear Jim

i guess if there is stuff missing then... jury's out there... but from what i've read i have to agree with the others that it sounds like your reaction, albeit strong, was in line with the situation.

strong emotions are appropriate sometimes. we are taught to beware of them because our illness can cause them to manifest when they are inappropriate. but that does not mean that every strong feeling, or display of strong emotion is pathological. i hope your wife does not have unrealistic expectations of your meds. Zoloft is not a happy peace pill. Its function is ONLY to stop you from feeling extremely low emotions in absence of a justifying stimulus.

i also don't think a day of Zoloft would be enough to change one's mood ... but that's just my experience with it.

~ waves ~

[Jim091866]

Originally Posted by waves

Dear Jim

i guess if there is stuff missing then... jury's out there... but from what i've read i have to agree with the others that it sounds like your reaction, albeit strong, was in line with the situation.

strong emotions are appropriate sometimes. we are taught to beware of them because our illness can cause them to manifest when they are inappropriate. but that does not mean that every strong feeling, or display of strong emotion is pathological. i hope your wife does not have unrealistic expectations of your meds. Zoloft is not a happy peace pill. Its function is ONLY to stop you from feeling extremely low emotions in absence of a justifying stimulus.

i also don't think a day of Zoloft would be enough to change one's mood ... but that's just my experience with it.

~ waves ~

That's the thing about it. I've NEVER been low, always had an upbeat attitude. I admit it I have an anger problem but not depression.

[waves]

Hi Jim

hmmmm....

it might help us to understand better, if i may ask...

what is your dx and what was the Zoloft given to you for? (it is used for anxiety and OCD, for instance, and off label for various other things too...)

also, are you on any other medications?

~ waves ~

[Mari]

Dear Jim,

The good news is that you and your wife are supporting each other in this.

I'm wondering
1. how long had you been on the 200 zoloft before you missed a day
2. if you had any other med changes around that time.

My wife suffers from agorophobia, can hardly go out of the house,etc. And they persist to tell her to get help,stop taking meds, etc., etc. Well, at this point I lost it.

I'm sorry that your daughters are not being supportive about your wife's difficulties.

I told them that rent is now due-the one daughter moved back in with a bf 6 weeks ago at which time we told her $200 a month! Seen nothing of it. Furthermore told them theyre getting their own insurance policy as of Oct 1, we cannot risk their choices and behavior affecting our policy and liability. I even put this in a letter for them so they knew I was serious.

From reading this, I'm guessing that your daughters have been causing you distress even before you missed the Zoloft.

Do you have a therapist? Therapy might help you learn strategies for dealing with the two of them.

M.

[bizi]

I agree with mari....therapy would help you and your family.
I am sorry it is so hard right now....you guys can do this....
bizi

[Dmom3005]

Jim and Wife

Sorry I wanted to address both of you.


First I wanted to say it takes guts to raise these kind of problems to our
grown children. Bravo! Whether you thought it appropriate or not exactly.

One day they will thank you.

I can attest to that. I have a 28 year old that does this once in a while.

I also have a 23 year old that is struggling right now to find a job.
He wants very much to be his own person. But its hard to know how
to help him.

Donna