Hi everyone, I have not been on here for a long time. I don't know where to turn. I have an appt with my psychologist on Monday, but I don't want to tell her my prob: I think, no, I know I am addicted to pain pills. I have been on them since last August..I had a partially torn achillies, then I had surgery. Then I took pain meds for my back...I had 2 herniated discs, spondololisthesis, degenerative disc diseasei think that is the same as hnp..anyway, then i had back surgery. I had been taking them as instructed for most of the time. Over the summer my husband was prescribed percocet because he had foot surgery and I took all his..he didn't notice, he dosent take any kind of pain med. Then I ran out of my pain med..vicoden in august and I was withdraing pretty badly...extreme depression, etc....then prescribed more on my reg med check day at the dr. Then my husband was presccribed MORE pain meds...really bad ones..percocet, 5mg AND oxycontin 10 mg. I feel so embarrassed writing this. I am losing it. I want to stop, but not bad enough I guess because I don't want to tell either of my pdocs. I have never held a secret in like this...I have a big huge mouth and i tell everyone everything always, but not this. My biggest fear is the withdrawl. I wish i knew someone who had a withdrawl story that was positive...what i mean is, not so hard. No, I expect it to be hard..I don't wan to commit suicide from the depression...I have 2 kids. i am thinking i will prob have to go into rehab? Please help me. I need some advise. Thank you so so so so much!