Biggest of hugs KD!

((((((Kimmy)))))),

I know the love for a baby brother. It's like no other relationship I lost my baby brother to suicide just over 40 years ago. It still whacks me upside the head sometimes

Is your brother a VISUAL person?? Can you get one of those plastic make-it-yourself buttons and put a picture of his son inside the button. Pin the button over his heart.

This society is so hard for young men nowadays. Even stable young men. Men with psychiatric problems and self-esteem problems have such a harder row to hoe

I don't have life experience with all the 'issues' that your brother is dealing with. My families problems have been depression and personality disorders.

See if you can get him into a clinical trial for "dialectical behavior therapy". I checked both clinicaltrials.gov and centerwatch.org and couldn't find anything in your area. I do know from personal experience that there are always trials going on in the teaching hospitals that are not always in the published lists. The DBT will help him reign in his thinking and understand that he really will be missed by his son and his family if he just lets go.

I've participated in a couple of clinical trials. I was in the original prozac studies over two decades ago. You're hooked up with a therapist. You get free drugs. And consistent monitoring. And a name and phone number to call if you start spinning out of control. Maybe this might be a way to help him.

Give this guy a call: http://www.ohio.edu/counseling/Groups.cfm and see if he can recommend anything. (About half-way down the page: Dialectical Behavior Therapy Group, Contact person: Fred Weiner, Ph.D.)

Another idea of a way to regulate one's thinking is Recovery, Incorporated (http://www.recovery-inc.com/). One uses only specific speech to talk about one's problems. This is worldwide and is basically free except for maybe coffee and cleanup charges. You can get the books from the libraries. You can find meetings here: http://www.recovery-inc.com/meetings/midwest.html#ohio

I'm praying for all of you. Hugs.

Barb

((((((((KimmyDawn & Brother & Lil Man)))))))))))))))

Heh, i am not emotionally safe but so what. I am fairly empathic but often can separate my own emotions from those i "absorb." I cried all through reading your note and that's ok. It was a note to cry about.No need to explain it. It is a gift of Mother Nature. Keep it always close to your heart, and wrap it in a baby blanky of hope. If you remind your brother of this connection with his child, of the bright lit eyes... do it in a non pressuring way... i don't know how his manias fly but if he is at all labile... or the mania starting to degrade (eg, i often get dysphoric before passing on to depression or euthymia. i wouldn't want for something,even beautiful, like that to set him off feeling guilty, for not being able to "step up to the plate," or feeling neglectful. Your call. You know him... just wanted to relate how things sometimes go for me.

Bizi hits nail on head wrt frequency of cycling and prognosis.. The longer an episode lasts, and the more episodes occur, the worse the illness becomes. This had often been attributed to the kindling theory, as with epilepsy. i am not sure on recent research though - whether this has been scientifically proven or disproven now. But it does make sense.

Kindling as it was explained to me by former pdoc: conceptually, each time an area of the brain becomes overactive (episode), that area is sensitized and easily "set alight" again whereupon it it "kindles" other areas... the threshold for an episode lowers. The kindling theory of bipolar was borrowed from what occurs in Epilepsy - the more and the worse seizures you have, the more you're gonna have, and each time worse since more of the brain is "kindled" and so "lights up" each time for it. ahh... google. i found this if you want to read more on the

The "Kindling" Model in Bipolar Disorder

kindling and prevention: treat each episode ASAP, including hypomania, if you can catch it. if your brother is full manic right now, can you somehow get him help right away, without a lockup? w/o waiting for his desperate call? With the bond you describe with him, could you get him to a voluntary checkin? He needs help yesterday.

I'm sorry if it sounds sorta pushy. I feel so badly you are witnessing all this... people around me firsthand have told me how hard it is, and how helpless one can feel. But i'm glad you are there for him, and I just know he is too.

I am glad he has you for a sister, and that you can care for his little man. You are helping so much already. Remember to give yourself some "me time" too. Time to breathe. Time to put your nose full into a tea rose and breath in that perfume, deeply... i.e. remember the oxygen mask principle.



~ waves ~
~

I don't know why i had this whim ... i guess you sounded so sad ... and afraid ... I want to share this with you, fwiw. a whimmy for kimmy .

~ waves ~ from across the ocean

Waves,
Know that you are not alone.


M.

Waves, thank you so much for that detailed information.

I've listened to conference tapes wherein a neurologist speaks of kindling. It's fascinating and I actually applied much to myself in the realm of PTSD.

He's still in the strong mania. I'm watching as I can, but his boy is my first priority as well as my family.

Love and thanks to all.

I so need this support.

Kd

((((((Waves)))))) <<-- she *IS* amazing, isn't she



((((((Kimmy)))))),



Barb