[butterfly11]

Did the abdominal CT. Other than the contrast giving me a headache it wasn't bad. Good news is the hernia is not causing any bowel obstruction or other problems so I do not require surgery at this time and maybe never. There are 3 low-density spots on my liver. I go back for an ultrasound next Monday for them to ultrasound my liver. I am a little freaked out about that but hoping it is nothing. Also, I am being referred to a gasto because the radiologist report says I need to have an upper GI scope. There is some type of abnormal filling of my gastric fundus (upper part of my stomach) measuring 9mm. Not sure what that is about, I am putting that off until all is done and behind me with my liver. I can only handle one medical issue at a time right now.

I am sorry that I have not been around here much lately. Depression has rolled in. I am staying consistent though with doing my exercising and that is helping.

Today is the one year anniversary of my friend going to heaven. It is difficult. This one is for her https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWtyj_l9WKM

[Dmom3005]

Sending you some hugs Butterfly. After today it will get better.

Sending you more hugs.

Donna

[bizi]

I am sorry you are hurting my friend.
((((((HUGS))))))
bizi

[Mari]

Originally Posted by butterfly11

Dear Butterfly,

That is a sad song. I am sorry you are grieving.

You are smart to do the health concerns one at a time.

Mari

[butterfly11]

I have a sore throat so I decided to cook a vegetable soup this afternoon. But I needed some ingredients so the children and I went to the grocery store. When I went to check out, guess who was ahead of me in line? My friend who just passed away's Aunt. We started talking and then talked for 40 minutes near the exit door. She explained that my friend's husband is not returning their calls or messages either. She also told me he has a girlfriend and that he wants to move on with his life. This is my friend's family not his. I can understand him distancing himself from them, but why me? I wish that he knew that above all else I want happiness for him and his daughter. I do not think it is too soon for a girlfriend. I believe in love and not judging other people.

I also do not believe in coincidences and think I met up with her for a reason. A burden has lifted off me. Now I feel that it is nothing personal towards me or something that I did that I'm not aware of for him to avoid me. I think he thinks I will be upset, but that is not the case. If he wants to move forward in life with a new woman and leave old friends behind that is his prerogative. I wish I could have heard all this from him but situations like this are a complicated sticky mess and no one really knows what to say, do, or how to react. I am strangely calm about this all.

[Mari]

Dear Butterfly,

Yes, these situations are complicated. I am very glad that you ran into the aunt -- otherwise you could wonder if it is about you.

I think that he is busy with taking care of his daughter and keeping up with the new woman.

Thank goodness that you are o.k. after hearing about this. It is hard to lose a friend and then deal with the other people involved as well. It is sort of a double and triply hurt. We hurt about the friend passing and we hurt when we think about the survivors. There are so many aspects of mourning that no one warns us about.
M

[butterfly11]

Originally Posted by Mari

Dear Butterfly,

Yes, these situations are complicated. I am very glad that you ran into the aunt -- otherwise you could wonder if it is about you.

I think that he is busy with taking care of his daughter and keeping up with the new woman.

Thank goodness that you are o.k. after hearing about this. It is hard to lose a friend and then deal with the other people involved as well. It is sort of a double and triply hurt. We hurt about the friend passing and we hurt when we think about the survivors. There are so many aspects of mourning that no one warns us about.
M

Yes, you are right Mari. I hurt when I think about her daughter and wish I could be more involved in her life, but ... this is something I can't change. I can pray for her though. And you never know what the future holds.

Mari Your facebook posts on here have inspired me. I have removed him from my notification & news feed that way I don't have to see his comments on other posts, etc. I don't need the daily reminder of all that has happened. I can always go to his page directly if I feel like it. I did this today & feel relieved.

I guess I feel like he was her husband and he has moved on. This just feels like permission somehow to not worry so much about him & his daughter. And I didn't know I needed that but I did.

[bizi]

I am glad to hear that you are ok with this.
We have to take care of ourselves. glad that you ran into the woman.....
I believe in fate.
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi

[Mari]

Originally Posted by butterfly11

I guess I feel like he was her husband and he has moved on. This just feels like permission somehow to not worry so much about him & his daughter. And I didn't know I needed that but I did.

Butterfly,

Absolutely. You do not need to know his updates. He can still private message you directly.

I think he will be back at some point in the future. He will connect with you and you will see the daughter. Maybe it will work out better this way. When he does get around to contacting you, you will be in a safer place than you are now.

I feel sorry for the guy. I pray that God is watching out for him and his daughter.

M

[butterfly11]

Originally Posted by Mari

Butterfly,
I feel sorry for the guy. I pray that God is watching out for him and his daughter.

Me too, Mari, me too. He took very good care of my friend through many surgeries that she had. He loved her, I know he did. I feel like he deserves love again in this life.