[Pamster]

Possible trigger
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I am sitting here feeling really depressed because I wanted to set up going to a concert this summer with a friend and she said she won't be able to go and now my significant other is saying he doesn't want me to go because it's dangerous and 'you're not a young woman anymore Pam' and I just can't stop the tears.

I hate that he feels this way because I really want to go and it's like a total killjoy to say something like that to me. I think I would be okay, I am not a stupid idiot incapable of taking care of myself or something. I really want to go. He'd said he'd watch our son and let me go when I originally talked about it and now he's back to his thing of 'you're not a kid anymore' trip.

Tell me I should just get over it and I'll try. But right now I am sitting here crying quietly feeling like a total loser because I wanted to go see Leppard this summer and am almost 40. It hurts so much to think that another tour is going by that I won't get to enjoy their performance. It's an outdoor show and I would so love to go.

Another thing I am upset over is that he is insisting on moving everything BY HIMSELF and he won't let anyone help. Not mother, not his father NO ONE. He thinks it's going to be hard but it's going to be really hard, and I know he's going to hurt like hell during the move, but he's so stubborn he won't let anyone help.

I just needed to vent, I've stopped crying at least, mostly because I want to be able to use my CPAP tonight and if I sit here crying much longer my nose will not cooperate with the mask and I will sleep terribly tonight. The fact I took 1/2 a avitan might have helped too.