[OhKay]

Yesterday was a much better day. I was able to clear up the insurance mess early, so eventually the stress over that faded away. I went out for a quick errand. It was sunny out, so it was a good day to get out for a little while following several sedentary days locked up in the apartment. I was back down to 2mg of klonopin and was actually able to take a nap.

This morning I woke up with less anxiety. I'm hoping that I'm going to have an even better day today

I told my father-in-law only that I wasn't going to be going to breakfast on Father's Day because I didn't want my sister-in-law to feel uncomfortable, and he did understand. I told him I'd already discussed the matter with my husband and asked him not to mention it to my sister-in-law. Meddling is sort of in his nature, and this is a sensitive subject.

I don't discuss the extent of my issues with anxiety and OCD with my husband. When things are bad, he can sometimes tell something's off, but he can't tell what it is. I internalize (probably because growing up my family members could always smell blood in the water), and he's not very astute, so I can hide things very well. There's a snowball's chance in hell I would admit to him how much facing his sister (or other family members) would effect me. He would turn it around on me, and it would ignite an argument about what a piece of **** he thinks I am.

I've decided I want to get the upgraded version of the Keurig coffee brewer, and I'm going to go check it out in person today. I want to make sure it's not a behemoth and will fit on our countertop before I buy it online. I have a coupon for BBB, and if I can use it, the price would be competitive. I may end up bringing one home today.

Before I can even think about leaving the house, I have to win today's battle of the laundry wars. I started at 7am and it's about 9 now… I have one load in the dryer and one still in the washer. The times are staggered so there's no way I can shower while the laundry is going. I don't want to find my laundry on the floor…

[Mari]

Kay,

That is good that your f-in-law and you settled the non-breakfast on father's day.
I understand about not telling your husband these things.

Did the upgraded version of the Keurig coffee brewer pass your inspection?

Mari

[OhKay]

Yesterday morning started out well.

It took me 4 hours to finish my laundry. Luckily I started early at 7am, so that didn't bother me as much as usual.

While waiting for my laundry, I started battling with my printer. First, it wouldn't print because the "magenta" ink (which I did not need) was low, then I couldn't get it to connect to my wireless network (which I was forced to reset Monday) because the wireless signal was too weak (AGAIN).

I took a quick shower and went out to run many errands…

After taking a look at the new updated Keurig, and realizing I'd be saving $30, I took one home! It has all the options I wanted, and it's very pretty. Absolutely no buyer's remorse.

I set up the Keurig when I got home. Then I installed new ink cartridges in the printer and some how managed to get it online and print the documents I needed from the insurance co.

I worked myself up into a frenzy trying to get everything done. I don't know how well the klonopin would have worked during the day because I was only on 1mg while I was out because I was driving, but I took another mg when I got home and settled down a bit.

I did way too much yesterday. I definitely did not get enough sleep after all of yesterday's activities. I have to run to the post office, but otherwise will be resting at home today.

I'm thinking about going to the club tomorrow, but that depends on whether or not I'm able to get any housework done today.
Last week I did my grocery shopping on Friday. I would like to put it off until Saturday this week if I can.

[Mari]

Kay,

So very very happy to hear that you have theKeurig and that it is new and that you got a great price!

I remember those laundry days of dealing with "community facilities."
Hubby wanted to get our own little place here so he could trust that his packages
would get delivered and I wanted to move out of the apt to get our own
washer / dryer.
Both recent-ish hurricanes involved our having to get back to work
although we had no power and no way to do clothes in our building.
It was a big hassle.

--
You are busy with lots to take care of.
I especially admire that you dealt with insurance taking out the payment.

You have lots together.


M

[OhKay]

My husband and I bought a town-house style condo about year after we were married. We lived there for only a few months before I was diagnosed with MS, and about a year before I had to stop working. With the loss of my income, and the cost of COBRA and my medical care, we couldn't afford to pay the mortgage anymore and were forced into a short sale. The funny thing is over the course of the 7 years or so we've been at this ****** apartment, our rent is much more expensive than the mortgage payment was. We were just in a terrible spot at the time of the MS diagnosis. The cost of the COBRA alone was ridiculous, and I couldn't be without insurance.

Our lease here is up for renewal, and we have to sign by July 1st. If we had the money, and I had my way, we'd be out of here. My husband wants the new AC we've been waiting for since last year (I doubt he'll get his way by then). We probably shouldn't be running the one we have because it's an electrical hazard, among other things. I want a new bathroom ceiling because there's a lot of water damage that they've just been spraying. The stains keep coming back and now the ceiling is cracking and falling apart.

Now that I'm on the move I can't believe I was able to sit here stagnant for so long, but I am really pushing it doing too much. I'm definitely taking full advantage of my independence and the opportunity to do what I want. At the present, I think I'm trying to find ways to occupy myself to block out the noise because I'm doing mindless sedentary things as well. It's working to a point, but my body is suffering. I was absolutely exhausted yesterday doing nothing, and this morning I'm still hung over from Wednesday, but I was up at 6:30am again because that's habitual.
I haven't decided if I'm going to go food shopping or not today. I have to take inventory. I will only go if necessary. If I do go, I will be leaving everything but the perishables in the trunk for my husband to take care of.
I am not going to go to the club today, so I guess I'm skipping a week again, but I'm okay with that.

I am LOVING that Keurig! There is a temperature adjustment on it so I can brew a cup of coffee I can drink immediately! After registering it, the company gave me a coupon code for 1/2 off up to 5 packages of K-cups with free shipping. I did the math, and it will save me a lot of dough, so I will definitely be taking advantage of that offer. I just have to choose 5 boxes out of 209 options

[Mari]

CNN does a slightly better job here than Fox did:

Was Florida shooter's ex-wife right to say he was 'bipolar'? - CNN.com

Those with a psychiatric diagnosis are actually more likely to be victims of violence or suicide, not to be perpetrators in acts of violence.

They say it is likely Anti-Social Personality.

M

[Mari]

Kay,

I remember paying COBRA insurance after my first husband left.
It was expensive and stressful but there was no other way for me to live than to send that check on time every month. Somehow I made it a priority.
(I also prayed for Ted Kennedy and his family everyday for what he was accomplishing with health care.)

That apt needs some major work! I hope the landlord steps up and takes care of things for you.

M

[OhKay]

It's gotten to the point now where I know I'm going to have to see my pdoc about my anxiety issues. The klonopin is helping, but the frequency and persistence of my symptoms is concerning. Yesterday was terrible, and this morning isn't starting out well. I'm also having an overlap of PTSD, OCD, intrusive thoughts (pdoc calls it a "ball")… I'm just a ****ing mess when I wake up and/or the klonopin starts to wear off. I'm tempted just to add the extra 50mg of seroquel myself at this point so that I'm not experiencing these symptoms at all.

I woke up with a junky cough and some sinus issues. Yay! I had some Mucinex DM laying around and took that this morning. Hopefully it will work some magic and this problem will disappear. It's my allergies… aside from the allergra (I can't take anymore) has worked.

Thank you for that link Mari. That was good work by CNN, and written for everyman so it can be widely understood. There was nothing said on air during that particular Fox segment that would mitigate the damage done by the anchor's comment. BTW, I'm sorry I ran away with your thread

We have multiple problems aside from the bathroom ceiling and the AC unit. We call and they just slap bandaids on. You get tired of calling. Those are just the 2 biggies. On Monday I'm going to reload the laundry card and will stop by the office to ask about the new lease. I'm also going to ask for the ETA on the AC unit. I'll show the office manager pictures of the BR ceiling while I'm there and tell her it's time for a permanent fix.

I did do the food shopping yesterday, but I got a late start. I got lucky and my husband was home by the time I got back so I only had to carry 2 light bags I was feeling crappy so even though I went to the butcher shop yesterday and I ended up making hot dogs and french fries for dinner.

My husband needs new work boots, so the plan for today is to get that over with. He's super quick. Nobody wants to go shoe shopping with me. I'm terrible. My brother is 8 years younger than me. When I had custody of him (he was 13-15), it was an actual punishment. I'm not kidding.

We swapped the placements of the cat condos, and they're both getting more use now. Buddy is spending half of the morning on a perch behind me instead of climbing all over me, and that's a welcome change because he can get obnoxious. I weighed the cats the other day because Dottie clearly gained weight (4 lbs, so now she's at 21). I was surprised that Rocky lost weight (26 lbs to 23). Buddy stayed about the same at around 7 lbs. I hadn't weighed them in years. Dottie won't eat people food, or even cat treats, and I never see her eat, so I don't know how she got so fat. I keep feeling her up for tumors, but she feels absolutely solid all over. The other two will eat anything.

I'm thinking about hiding some of the toys for a while. We have about 8-10 of them. They're all over the apartment. I put them away, and as soon as I stop vacuuming, get in the shower, or walk out the door (i.e./ to get the mail) Rocky drags them all out again.