[OhKay]

My father-in-law's feelings were hurt because I didn't go to breakfast, he's mad at me, and is laying the guilt trip on pretty thick. My husband said it went well, he had a good time, and his father would get over me not going. I feel terrible though.
This won't be the last time we have to deal with this type of issue. My father-in-law will be up north for several weeks, and will expect to see me at some point. I get the feeling my husband doesn't want me to see any of his family members. I'm not making any more excuses. I'll throw my husband under the bus if my father-in-law asks to see me and my husband says no.

My husband left the house at 9am yesterday and came home at 7pm. He only spent about 2 hours with his father (which I think is unfair). He spent the rest of the time at his mother's house to celebrate Father's Day with his step father (I sent him a text and he didn't respond). I made a pot of chili for dinner. I texted my husband at 6:30pm since I hadn't heard from him, and he said he'd already eaten. I wasn't thrilled about that, but at least the chili will keep well in the fridge.

I have a busy week coming up. Wednesday morning I see my neurologist, and my endoscopy is Friday. I hate having two appointments in a week. Friday will definitely be a washout because I'll be sedated for the procedure and will probably want to sleep most of the day when I get home.

I think I'm going to try to do at least phase 1 of the South Beach Diet. I bought the book on Amazon, and it should be here on Friday. I don't know how strictly I'll adhere to it. Even losing a little weight will make me more comfortable. Using the exercise bike is good, but I'm not going to lose any weight that way.

[Mari]

It is hard to get in the way of a man's feelings for his father, mother, step mother.
Apparently,you can advise, suggest, and use some logic, but he is going to
do what he is going to do.

Good luck on South Beach. I did it for a couple of weeks two times and felt good about it.


M

[OhKay]

I don't ask my husband too many questions. Sometimes things come up and I get some breadcrumbs, though. I mentioned that I texted his step father "Happy Father's Day," but he didn't return my text. My husband said, "They acknowledge it through me." He never mentions it though. Odd.

We've been back together for a year and a half. I'm sure there has been some conversation about how we are doing, etc. We are doing well, with the exception of his behavior, which he would never acknowledge. He has his reasons for keeping us separate, whatever they are.

I was 11 months sober yesterday. It think if I can do that, I can handle at least 2 weeks of the highly restricted South Beach Diet. I'm not going to cut out coffee though, but I will switch to fat free 1/2 & !/2, use less of it, and use sugar substitute. I don't think it will be too difficult to prepare 2 different dinners. My book arrives on Friday.

I'm going to continue my work on the exercise bike. That can only help.
My only worry is that I won't be taking in enough calories to tolerate the meds I'm on. I'm going to have to listen to my body, and add a few more carbs if I need to.

[eva5667faliure]

Originally Posted by OhKay

I don't ask my husband too many questions. Sometimes things come up and I get some breadcrumbs, though. I mentioned that I texted his step father "Happy Father's Day," but he didn't return my text. My husband said, "They acknowledge it through me." He never mentions it though. Odd.

We've been back together for a year and a half. I'm sure there has been some conversation about how we are doing, etc. We are doing well, with the exception of his behavior, which he would never acknowledge. He has his reasons for keeping us separate, whatever they are.

I was 11 months sober yesterday. It think if I can do that, I can handle at least 2 weeks of the highly restricted South Beach Diet. I'm not going to cut out coffee though, but I will switch to fat free 1/2 & !/2, use less of it, and use sugar substitute. I don't think it will be too difficult to prepare 2 different dinners. My book arrives on Friday.

I'm going to continue my work on the exercise bike. That can only help.
My only worry is that I won't be taking in enough calories to tolerate the meds I'm on. I'm going to have to listen to my body, and add a few more carbs if I need to.

And don't you ever forget it
Just the fact you can and have not
gone off grid
And maintained soberiety is everything
Everything
It is so hard
Just to do
One day at a time when bombarded at all sides
You have kept your composure
Family and how fickle they can be
And amazing job it is to having a significant other in that way
and you are willing to in that unit
You can only do for you
And make things happen for you
Easy it isn't
But you have conquered
One day at a time
You matter
Love
Me

[Dmom3005]

Congrats Kay on the 11 months. Keep up the good work.

Donna

[bizi]

HI kay, just trying to get caught up....
sorry for the fathers day outcomes...what drama.
sigh
I feel for you on many levels.
bizi
I miss the espresso machines of italy.
My coffee was so weak this morning....blah

[OhKay]

Thank you Eva, Donna, and Bizi :group hug:

My South Beach Diet book is supposed to arrive on Friday and I intended to start the diet Monday, but my husband's birthday is July 9th, our anniversary is the 10th, and my birthday is the 11th. I buy an ice cream cake every year and we will be eating out. I won't be through Phase 1 of the diet by then, and won't be able to stick to it, so I have decided to wait until the day after my birthday to start it (but may change my mind ?). I was hoping to start sooner, but I guess this will give me more time to plan. I will continue my work on the exercise bike in the meantime.

I'm letting all the crap with my husband's family go for now. I'm not going to waste anymore time thinking about it right now because it's detrimental. If another issue arises, I will make him deal with it. Then maybe I will see some transparency for once.

I see my neurologist today. I will talk to him about my fatigue issues, which haven't improved. I want to discontinue the amantadine. It was too sedating for me to tolerate in the afternoon, so it's likely not helping, and may actually be contributing to am sedation, too. I also have to discuss the edoscopy I'm having on Friday because the reflux and swallowing problems could be due to MS. I do have preexisting swallowing problems due to MS. I have no gag reflex. I'm also losing my balance sometimes and staggering to the left at times when tired, but it could be due to sinus/inner ear issues from my allergies. He can just take a peek in my ears.

My neighbor's mother moved in with him about 6 months ago and she has mild dementia. I ran into him in the laundry room and asked about her because I hadn't seen her in a couple of days. The poor thing fell and broke both her wrists and will require bilateral surgeries. I let him know I'm just across the hall and am usually home, and would be more than happy to do welfare checks when she returns. I hope they send her to rehab for a little while before they send her home because she will be pretty helpless for a while. It's sad because his daughter was married the day before and he said that was the happiest day of his life. They are all very nice people. He's been my neighbor for 6 1/2 years.