it is probably hypomania. i really need an increase in the antidepressant. most of the time i am really depressed. it is not pleasant.
love
bobby depressed again

i just got some great news. at first i was told by the pharmacy the aplenzin would be 275 dollars. I told them it should only be 20 dollars for three months because i belong to epic. i called them again and repeated it.before i was told that i had to wait til monday to find out how much it would cost me.
i checked my email and they delivered it. at first i thought they would make pay 275 but when i called them up they said it was 20 dollars. my mood had sunk deeper before i found out and thought that since i can't walk two blocks they would have to wait til marci came and brought it back.i wasn't going to pay 275.
i am so angry that they didn't call me when they had straightened it out and i got a stomach ache from worrying. i know i should be greatful but i always think the worse.

i am just going to try harder. i will try to stop buying clothes and books. i will force myself to do an exercise every day that doesn't hurt but stretches my legs. the second time i fell i used it and it really helped.
i am so undisciplined.

i am so furious and just got a stomach ache. the pharmacy screwed up. they charged me275 dollars instead of 20 and i don't know if it was there mistake to send me one bottle instead of three or it was my psychiatrist. i have to wait til 9 for the store to open. i don't feel like having to spend 125 to talk with my doctor for 5 or 10 minutes..

my rage has calmed down. i feel blackmailed. i need dr bergman because i like him and psychiatrists who take medicare are sickos. one told me to bring in my cats and refused to give me klonopin. she tried antihistimines . i might as well have taken sugar pills. the other one i liked but she wouldn't give me klonopin and told me to go to bed at 8 and wake up at five. creepy. then i went back to dr bergman. when i don't see him i have to pay 60 to him to write a prescription for klonopin for 60 dollars every month and pay the pharmacy 3.70 cents. i only speak with dr bergman for 10 minutes at most and he charges me 125 dollars. my ss is small so i have been using up my savings. that is terrifying. the pharmacy opens at 9.
i am reading another book which is calming me down but because of my anger i am now hyperventilating but my stomach is beginning to feel better.

i am so f@#King mad. i spoke to the pharmacy and the guy couldn't give answers except my f@#king dr bergman only asked for a one month prescription. i have to wait until monday. i told him i didn't approve the cost.
i am ashamed of dr. ira bergman because i told how bad my depression has been..

i think i am going off of aplenzin. i don't think it helps much because i am usually depressed anyways so f@#k it. it did work for a while. i have tried other antidepressents and they didn't work. reading really helps me and focusing on my kitty cats. i will start drinking more chamomille tea. and eating more low calorie ice cream.

i don't feel well. i just wrote my therapist whose agency uses medicare. they have a woman psychiatrist. i wrote him about mine not taking medicare and charges me 60 a month to write a clonazepam script. i wanted to find if she would write one. i would save a lot of money.

Bobby

I'm so sorry your having so much trouble.

Donna

i ordered some stella doro cookies and a lot of low calorie ice cream. i am looking forward to them. a coping mechanism