this has not been my week. my foot hurts so much. the cleaning help didn't
come. what a wreck. i can't lift anything with walker. i have nausea and stomach ache.
the kitties haven't gone near me so at least my allergies stopped for a while.
i had to stop watching the news.
i want to cry so badly but can't.

can't wait to speak to my therapist on Tuesday about my anger.
i see my p.t. today and hope he has suggestions for my leg pain. my apartment is a wreck because i can hardly pick up anything.
i don't know if i will get a spanish speaking cleaning woman this afternoon. my caseworker told me to put away my pride about the mess that i have no control over.
i have to stop watching the news about ukraine. it is so heart breaking.
i am so afraid that Putin will keep on going but maybe he is not that insane to start world war 3. who knows.

Bobby

You need to quit worrying about the cleaning, that is there job.
Its what they come to do right So let them do it. I think you hopefully
will get some help with the therapist. If not please get some help
from a doctor if it doesn't get better next week.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

last night and today i spent a lot of time with my kitties. my nose ran a little but my eyes and nose weren't itchy. i am praying it continues.
i have to buy some rice. aaron told me to heat in the microwave some in a sock for 10 seconds and put it on my leg..
hardly any sleep. watched the news.

played a lot more with aby this morning and now the allergies are back. i am
so itchy and again until i got the vaccines i never had any allergies all my life.. i have had cats practically all my life. i guess i will just have to live with them
because i will play with my kitties as much as they want.
went down on floor to give them more food. it took over 5 minutes to get up to the walker. what a pain.
guess i will get more chinese food.i am so incapitated i will have marci make 24 hard boiled eggs.
last night i felt as if i were dying. had no energy what so ever and was severely depressed. a few hours later it passed.

Bobby

I'm so sorry you are having so much trouble right now. Just
keep doing as much as you can. I wish you could stop watching
the news and find something else to watch. But I know that
is very hard.

Have a good day.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

The rice is a nice trick/use of rice. usually they say ice for the first 3 days. I can't remember when or how you hurt your leg. Was it your latest fall?
bizi

yes it was. it was the result of overdoing my p.t. he had pushed too much since i had been making great progress,

I hope you start to feel better soon.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

Yes I hope you can recover quickly.
bizi

thank you. i have been obsessing so much why i didn't listen to my body and pay attention to how tired my legs were after that walking. i should not have gone downstairs. i should have rested a couple of days. the discomfort is interfering with my concentration. i am so angry at my stupidity.
i was able to finish a book. i have to use one of the sponges to wash my hair and body.
i don't know if i should be worried about pudge. i haven't seen her eat that much. i think the kitties know i am in pain and for the most part keeping away..
i can't stop watching the news. pudge just moved a little.
i don't feel like eating. i will just have hard boiled eggs for a few days.

pudge seems fine now. i have been having awful thoughts about my foot. it is hard to stop them.
i found my two kindles.
a lot of the news was so uplifting. there really are so many kind people in the world. people from here are volunteering to fight there. it will be at all their expense. on msnbc they switched to skye news. there was so much intelligent discussions and no commercials.

Bobby

That sounds good. Keep it up.

I think you can do this. Keep remembering to read your books. Its your
good place right now.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

I hope you heal and slow down and listen to your body.
glad that you found your kindles.
did you hurt your foot when you fell the last time?
maybe when you helper is there you can take a shower?
love
bizi

it has always been my legs but this was the left leg. the right leg has been weak since my stroke. you got to be kidding about taking a bath. it is impossible. this time both getting in and then getting out. my leg even hurts when i am not doing anything. i use sponges.
i can't stop watching the news. this nuclear stuff and the madman-how more dangerous can the world be. i am hoping for a coup to get rid of the monster before he blows up the world.

tell me again about your foot?
bizi

it is the ankle and the leg. after i walked outside with the walker my p.t. thought i did great but at the end they got weaker and i was caught before i fell. stupidly i didn't rest for a couple of days. the next i went downstairs with the walker for the mail. when i came back up my good leg and ankle twisted and went down hard. i felt around and didn't feel anything broken. when i tried to get up my right ankle kept on turning painfully and i couldn't get up. i crawled to the phone and three workers came up and lifted me to the bed.
i lay there for 5 hours until marci came. she had to call her coordinator who called 911. i didn't want to go to the hospital. the guy stand stand and i was able to stand.
i still have a lot of pain and obviously poor balance. this one is going to take a long time. i can't tell you how upset and depressed i am.

I am sorry that you are this depressed. and are having so many falls. How is your sleep. are you able to get some long stretches in.
I don't have any advice about your ankles legs.what about braces to help keep your ankles straight. I don't know what the answer is. Maybe you should see a doctor and get them to examine you and perhaps give you guidance.
One of my clients had her cat shaved. looks funny.
love

bizi need to go to work now.

Bobby

Do you have a brace for your ankle or foot. If not when your pt
comes ask him/her if there is one that might help with the weakness
and pain for now. Its how I walk on an hurting ankle. And I always
use one. When I twist an ankle because if I don't I can't walk on my
foot. Now I'm not talking about you, I'm talking about me. I really
do have to use a brace or ankle thingy because when I twist or hurt
my ankle I can't walk unless I have one. For me it also helps my ankle
not hurt as much. I'm not sure how it does that.

Now if its hurting when I am sitting. I take tylenol or ibprofen and use
heat.

DOnna :hug::grouphug:

my sleep is rotten. i asked him if it should be wrapped and he said no. i will mention about an ankle brace but it is also from my knee down to foot. i feel nauseated and chilled.
thank you.

Bobby

If its from your knee to your foot, that is probably why it shouldn't
be wrapped. If it doesn't get better in a week or so please get
an xray.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

he said not to wrap it because it is not swollen. i will go in three weeks if doesn't ease.

Awe, I wrap or brace it because it hurts to walk on it. And then when
I do that it helps my walking.

I do so because it helps my walking and pain.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

marci just said her friend's insurance lapsed and he was billed 5000 dollars for the ambulance. i am not going to a doctor.
i just used aaron's advice and put a sock full of heated rice on my bruise and it felt so much better.it is just a bad bruise,.my ankle isn't turning.
marci saw pudge eat a lot and drank. so relieved.

Bobby

You can use the rice in the sock every 20 minutes on and 20 off.

For a while. Then take it off for a while. And use again.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

Lara, that sounds like good advice.
Bobby, do you have an elastic band? could you get one?
Is there a pharmacy that you use to order one?
Where is the bruise? I must not have read enough.
I am sorry you are having all of these health issues.The reason I suggested

a brace is because you said your ankle was twisting on you.
love bizi

aaron didn't say that. he is so smart i only listen to him.

the ankle still hurts but isn't twistiing now. the p.t. was optimistic. i had bought wife elastic bans but he said no.
i am not having all these health issues. i am terrified of the scale. i have been so anxious i think that is why i am eating so much.
love,
bobby

james answered me that wrote A little compression is fine! Wouldn’t hurt!

Bobby

I told you about the 20 minutes on and 20 minutes off. Its more
for ice I am sorry. I forgot that. But they told me in PT to do it
for both Ice and heat. Just so that it would not be on the
heat part to long. But I would say to put the heat on longer
so you don't have to warm it up again.

I'm sorry I wasn't remembering this is heat not Cold, its cold that
you have to worry about it staying on to long.

Donna :hug::grouphug:

I like heating pads, I hate ice.but they say that after an injury you should ice the body part for the first 3 days. I just hate being cold so I never ice up like I should.
For example my knees are hurting when I get down on my knees for work.
I think they are getting better but are still painful. It is on the bottom thigh next to the knee.I don't know what I did to it. Just one day I could hardley bend down to put my knee on the floor.
bizi

do you think you should have it checked out? my healing is going to take forever-very depressing.
love
bobby

my leg is hurting less. just used the sponges to wash my hair and clean my body. i am doing it every other day. i feel clean. It is awful feeling like a pig. i shocked marci when she saw me cleaning the soles of my feet. She had said she was going to clean them.
i got so angry with walker i am using it much less. my balance is better and i just hold on to things. i am still listening to too much news but a lot it is inspiring. there are so many kind and brave people out there. i think i am through spending clothes now.. now if only i could diet. i am just buying more fruit.
i am beginning to think that i might start drinking sherry, bristol cream or scotch. it might help my depression and maybe help me sleep more. i have been giving it a lot of thought and i really hate suffering. so many bipolar people are alcoholics. one was my father. he suffered so much from depression. as an adult i asked him why he drank and he simply said it made him feel good..i think liquor would calm down my anxiety and curb my eating.

In the long run alcohol is a depressant.
I am sorry that you are suffering.
do you ever eat salads they made these chopped salads in a bag. I like the poppy seed one has chopped cabbage and brussel sprouts and rachio greens with pumpkin seeds and cranberry all separated out if you don't like. I love the poppy seed dressing.its is sweet. It says it has 3 servings. jeff and I can split a bag.
I think it will keep in your refrigerator a day so you can have some more the next day. I think you would like it.
love you
bizi

i buy bags of salad i can't win.i wonder if you wind up suffering from depression with your drinking.liquor it helped my father and he had a low tolerance so he got drunk fast and didn't drink much. he didn't look like a drunk.
i just order a big bottle of scotch and two bottles of bristol cream. i think it is worth a try and i will be 78 in may. i don't think i will live enough to cause damage. i won't be a heavy drinker.
love,
bobby

We found that total low-to-moderate alcohol drinking (5 to 15 g/day) was associated with lower risk of depression. A stronger inverse association was found for low-to-moderate wine-drinkers (two to seven glasses/week).Aug 30, 2013


We found that total low-to-moderate alcohol drinking (5 to 15 g/day) was associated with lower risk of depression. A stronger inverse association was found for low-to-moderate wine-drinkers (two to seven glasses/week).Aug 30, 2013


Is alcohol in moderation good for anxiety?
At first, drinking can reduce fears and take your mind off of your troubles. It can help you feel less shy, give you a boost in mood, and make you feel generally relaxed. In fact, alcohol's effects can be similar to those of antianxiety medications.

Older adults with GAD appear to use alcohol at an increased rate, but mild-to-moderate drinkers do not appear to experience sleep difficulties. In fact, use of a modest amount of alcohol may be beneficial for minimizing the association between anxiety/worry and insomnia among older adults with GAD.

Nevertheless, moderate alcohol consumption has been associated with a reduction of some health risks; for instance, compared to non- drinkers, moderate alcohol drinkers display a reduced risk of coronary artery disease11, ischemic stroke11, heart failure11, and type 2 diabetes12.

i just donated to directrelief. my senator sent me great sites to donate to.
Top-Rated Charities Providing Aid In Ukraine | Charity Ratings | Donating Tips | Best Charities | CharityWatch

i overdid yesterday with exercising my leg. it hurts so much and it hurts when i am just lying done. my stomach is really bothering me.
i emailed the social worker intern. what a disaster. I wrote that i wanted no more sessions. with her.

I am sorry it did not work out with the social worker but I am glad that you asserted yourself.
love bizi

thanks. she wrote if she could call me and i wrote i owe it to her. we talked for a long time and i told her she should listen to her gut and not her supervisor who gave her awful advice. i told her she should also always keep in mind the big picture and not minutia.
unlike you i can't take pain. I don't know long my leg will keep hurting. With my ibs my stomach hurts a lot so i am a bit afraid of pain killers.
i haven't tried any of the liquor yet. it is not appealing when you are nauseated. i have been taking Pepto-Bismol.
been watching news all the time.
love,
bobby

just emailed linda to call when she wants. she is my oldest friend and so self absorbed or self centered. last time she called i told her i was in terrible pain after my fall. she at first was so sympathetic and then it turned into her talking about how her mother dressed her when she was a little girl and named the colors she would use and the colors she didn't use.
linda will never change. she is 78

I used to drink drambui, it is a sipping after dinner drink.
I think it was like scotch high alcohol % with a bit of sweetness.
I loooovvveeeddd it.
I have been alcohol free AF, 11 days this time.
I really like to drink but know it is bad for me.


I am a binge drinker. I would black out and not
remember leaving a function.
I have thrown up at peoples houses.
It is just easier to abstain. having these
partakes and 0.0.0 beers has made all of the

difference in the world. I hope they do not discontinue them.
The partakes have 10 calories and less than .5%.

the 0.0.0 have 4 calories and zero % of alcohol

I drink both of them. If I have 6 partakes = 2.4%

alcohol which is less than half a Budweiser beer

which has 5 %. A Miller light has 3.2%. I think it may have less.
any way.
Scotch has 0 carbs so you can drink it following

a low carb diet. can't mix it with anything.

eggs,tuna fish with mayo canned meats

no rice, no sweets/sugars, no flour, no potatoes.

That is a simple guild line.

I hope the scotch helps your anxiety.
love you
bizi

i am a binge eater when i get really anxious and crave sweets and then most of the time i get nauseated and throw up. since i got ibs i get nauseated a lot and have awful stomach aches. i guess i am afraid of food now. today maybe i will just have hard boiled eggs and soup and coffee. i can't give up coffee.
i haven't tried the scotch or bristol cream yet. i have just been too nauseated. part of it is also due to chronic constipation.
I am afraid my leg and ankle won't feel better for a few months. I overdid using my leg a couple of days ago so it hurts more now. this morning i will do the exercises. do you know what pain killer is safe for an awful stomach? Do you think necklace would help my leg. I finally bought some depends. because of my leg sometimes i can't get out of my bed in time. what a mess. i need marci to change the sheet etc.
now for the good news. I really think my allergic reaction to the vaccine stopped. my eyes and skin no longer itch and just occasionally my nose runs.
I was petting pudge this morning for a while and all was well..
So far I stopped spending. Thank God. that is such a relief. i still go to ebay but don't buy anything. Last month my credit card was low. My taxes are finished. I am beginning to be able to start concentrating and beginning to read again. I have been consistently listening to music.
then i read yesterday that dejoy won't destroy the postal service. big relief.
i do watch too much news. now mnsbc has some sky news that is great .It
is weird. Even though I think the worse consequences that putin will continue to do i am so inspired by such brave Ukrainians. That is where my focus seems to go. The other day i heard together that a world war three would destroy the world because the nuclear bombs of Russia and U.S. are enough to destroy it. I feel so sorry for Biden since I understand now why he can't start world war 3.
love,
bobby