I feel like I'm back in the days of my childhood, and the confusion.

I had everything there was. Never being a child it seemed. My mom did the best she could to let me be a child. But it was doctor this, and doctor that.

And I had diabetes for a year. Strict diet, then not. NO real signs of diabetes.

And I had epilepsy for almost 16 years. But the EEG's didn't show the seizures, or a abnormal EEG. But they treated me for it. BEcause I had
the classic signs. ANd the medicine I was put on took the signs away
most of the time. And all the sudden I was free of the symptoms and
seizures for 5 or so years.

So I got taken off at almost 16 and could drive. And then I wasn't even
having to report it. Gosh I was normal all the sudden. And had no clue
why I wasn't having this anymore.

Then I had a spot in my eye, that could put me blind. And its still there,
its never moved. But if it does. I go blind or they think I will. Gosh I just
watch it. And watch it.

I have a kidney problem, or they think I do. Not any real information ever given on this one. But it could cause the need for dialysis at some time.
I've always had to have the urine test. My primary does this test every
year as ordered. I'm fine, or so they say. I had two biopsies as a child.

I spent 5 years of 1 week in the hospital (Riley) for testing it was always
spring break week. Not anything coming out of the testing. NOt ever
a thing found to be a concern. But they wanted me checked out, its a teaching hospital so lets have her double checked. But this really made
the teen and child in me worry.

I also have a heart murmur, that I have to have meds for if I have any infection, or dental work. So this is really getting to me. Do I need something for what ever is going on right now. Who would have a clue.

I'm getting paranoid, I've been considered a liability by everyone that ever knew me. I couldn't get jobs, or go to college. My parents spent all there money on my health care.

Now Its like deja vu. I'm going through this all over.

I'm now a adult and my husband is reminding me, his mom didn't want
him to marry someone that needed medical help.

SO gosh when is enough enough.

I'm a strong person.

But its getting old. I wanted to be able to leave the past in the past.

I'm ready to start the psychiatric past again, its back and its time.

I spent my junior and senior years with headaches, that were supposedly
all in my head.

Broken bones at many times.

(migraines)

Donna