Hi,
I woke up at 6:00 am feeling frightened.
. . . This along with a headache and a slight fever.

Normal people get up at 6:00; I am almost always awake at this time because I have not gone to bed yet -- except for the past two mornings.

Now I remember why I hate to go to bed at night. I hate/fear waking up when it is still dark outside. I was in a little bit of a panic earlier. I'm crazy maybe.

Now I am wonder how I going to manage going to work later at 9:00 with this low grade fever. . . . Wondering if I stressed myself out yesterday or if I have something.

So I don't know what is happening.
Weird to be fearful --- esp. this early in the day
. . . . only 3 hours of sleep..

Mari

Dear Mari,
I am sorry if I stressed you out with all of my postings...I did not mean to do that.
I am sorry that you woke up scared....hopefully you can come home soon and take a nap.
hugs to you
(((((hugs)))))
bizi

Dear Bizi,
I stayed home from work today. I slept all afternoon until 6:30 pm.
I still have a headache. Maybe I can go to the gym for a quick work out and hope to feel better by tomorrow.

M.

I can be fearful anytime :-) If you are feeling badly, it makes everything worse. There is a bug going around up here...last week for a day I had the chills and started the cough again.
Did you feel slightly disorientated when you woke up? Do you have a favorite quilt? Maybe you should get a silly stuffed toy..I am serious..a cuddly silly stuffed toy. My kitty cats keep me slightly orientated..I know they want to eat..
I still believe you have been going through a lot of changes, changes for the good and that is scary...until you get used to the new you. I wish it were easy to Let It Be .......I wish you believed in golden safety nets...the other day I visualized a close friend whom I told you about being caught in one...since I couldn't help him with the trials he has been going through. I also thought thank God I am not a man and have to take all that pressure if I wanted to fit the stereotype of what makes a strong man.
DON'T PUSH YOURSELF WHEN YOU FEEL FRAGILE...THAT IS AN ORDER LOL
bOBBY
PS DON'T LISTEN TO ANYBODY WHO GIVES ORDERS

Mari,

If you have a fever you'll more than likely should be on anti-boitics. Of course it is a debate these days whether or not some things really need anti-biotics.

befuddled2

Two hours of sleep. Hot and headachy again.

I asked hubby to take my place at work.
I have to send him with some notes/memos and stuff to take care of.
A few other things I can take care of on the phone like I did yesterday.

I feel like I am being punished for doing something wrong. And I have no idea how to help myself.

I think this is another breakthru....you were never taught how to take care of yourself but instead how to take care of others....
if your fever isn't high i don't think you need a doctor...you probably need a lot of rest and a lot of liquid. Did you find out if anybody else at work is sick?
To be safe, maybe you should go to the doctors and maybe he/she would give you something to feel better.
Bobby

Dear Mari,

I hope you feel much better very soon!

A low grade fever is more typical of a viral infection than a bacterial infection. As you probably know, antibiotics are not helpful for the former of the two; indeed they lower the immune system - not helpful at all.

Lack of sleep can bring on a headache but so can a low grade fever, let alone the two combined.

I'm glad you stayed home and let your hubby step in. Good for you, taking care of yourself like that, and not pushing it.

Mari, as difficult as this experience is, i hope this new insight might bring about a breakthrough in therapy, helping you gain control over your the sleep patterns. Your realization is a huge new piece of information to work with! I'm sorry you experienced such fear, though! that does suck.

I hear a hint of down in the dumps, free-floating anxiety, guilt. Is there actually anything you regret having done? Your illness is not a punishment; we just get sick. Especially in early winter with weather changes, even if you don't have strong winters in your area.

Like Bizi, i hope the recent poignant postings - mine included - were not too hard on you. Seldom, very seldom have i seen you delete posts, yet you have been doing that. Yet, this suggests to me that you are down on yourself a priori - feeling unworthy? Feeling useless - not helpful OVERALL, as you have mentioned in one of your deletions? Do you feel you deserve to be punished (even if you do not know for what)?

You really do sound down in the dumps. But guess what, lack of sleep can cause down-in-the-dumpiness, not always it trigger mania. Feeling bad is a natural response to lack of sleep, and also to being ill!

Furthermore, be mindful of this: when we have sx of physical illness, there is typically an incubation period which may be symptom-free, other than perhaps feeling fatigued, which can express itself emotionally as well. The infection (and stress on the immune system) began before you started having fever and headache. And, during illness including incubation period, our ability to cope with stress is greatly diminished.

Food for thought for you. I hope this might be helpful. And perhaps the following too

~ waves ~ sending humongous healing hugs and positive energy your way

when you have fever and/or body aches suggesting a viral infection.

A gym teacher of my son's did that and developed an inflamed heart.
He was told by his doctors, and he told the kids, that exercising can drive viruses into the heart. He had a pericardial effusion, and almost died.

So, I'd recommend you pamper yourself instead, and stay away from the gym or other forms of exercise until you feel better.

Oh honey. What a horrible way to wake up. I am so sorry. I wish there was an answer to this. Something simple.

Sounds dumb, but what about a night light? Perhaps one of those motion sensor ones?

Not being able to sleep well runs havoc on the system.

If you are getting a virus or an infection, please be cautious with exersize. My family and their wonderful genes......I just worry cause of what I have experienced vicariously.