Here's the Way I See It
 

Dear Jennie,

(Please excuse any odd characters that appear in this letter. I have to write in Microsoft Word and then copy and paste onto the forum because my computer shuts down unexpectedly when I write directly in forum or email programs. The transposition causes the odd characters.)

Here is a link to a site that describes the various, “mood stabilizers” used to treat bipolarity. The overall site is the best single resource for bipolar information that I have found on the web. As far as I can see, “anti-psychotic” and “mood stabilizer” are phrases used synonymously to describe this genre of meds. “Depakote” would, therefore, be an anti-psychotic. http://www.psycheducation.org/depres...tabilizers.htm

“Celexa” is an SSRI, (Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor). While often a godsend for Unipolar Depressives, these meds can have paradoxical effects on Bipolars and send them into mania or depression. If you are not yet stable, my bet is that the fault lies with the Celexa rather than the Depakote.

At the risk of offending Christian Scientists on the forum, it is difficult for me to see how someone of this persuasion could be helpful to people like ourselves. Christian Scientists believe that, since god is all-good, he wouldn’t create anything that is “bad”. Ergo, if we are mentally ill, it is the fault of our perception rather than of reality. In reality, we are not sick. Essentially, Christian Scientists are zealous Cognitive Behavior Therapists. Through prayer and reading the works of Mary Baker Eddy one trains one’s mind to see reality as it truly exists, rather than in the malformed state that our (sinful?) perception takes in.

If it works for you, great. However, my secular view is that the chemical soup in our brain is out-of-balance, and it requires the addition of other chemicals to regularize it.

After reading your posts, it is obvious that you are still very much in control of yourself. The fact that one thinks about flying off a balcony doesn’t indicate that one is about to do so. You are afraid of the confusing, depressing interpretations of reality that your mind is sending you, and justifiably so. But many of us have been there and are still here.

Make an enumerated list of your concerns and the perceptions that elicited them before you see your shrink on Wednesday. He will probably make a medication change of some kind. However, if he doesn’t know the specifics of your reality, he won’t know specifically what to do.

Your mental health is a work in progress, and that is progress itself. Hang in. Most of us have, eventually, found relief. There is no reason that you should be different.

I would like to include some relationship advice. However, in view of my track record, I will refrain.

Good luck.

He isn't saying not to take meds or judging me for doing so. Its ME who is trying to think of things metaphysically and having a hard time when I get too far from reality.

How are mood stabilizers anti-psychotics? Isn't psychosis being out of touch with reality? That isn't a mood issue.

Dear Jennie,

To be honest, I don't know how these meds work or what would distinguish an anti-psychotic from a mood stabilizer. However, I think that your response contains the answer to your question. If you are profoundly out-of-touch with reality, as in paranoid schizophrenia, the drug with which you are treated would be considered an anti-psychotic. Conversely, if you are less out-of-touch, as in bipolar disorder, you might be treated with the same drug, but it would be considered a "mood stabilizer". RISPERDAL (risperidone) is such a med.

It would seem that the description, "mood stabilizer", was coined to assuage those who are frightened of the word, "psychotic". However, when healthcare professionals want to refer to all the drugs in this family, from Thorazine to Abilify, they call them, "anti-psychotics".

Oh please. The last thing I need is to have to guess what someone means in reading about something that is about me not understand my unpredictable world/reality, sometimes! They should say it like it is. I thought mood stabilizers make it so you don't end up exessively up or excessively down. That seems logical to me. Psychosis is not a matter of JUST being "up".

Part of the Same Continuum
 

Dear Jennie,

My experience with people diagnosed as bipolar is that it is not unusual for them to manifest symptoms of an illness that is commonly considered "worse", particularly schizophrenia. These folks are treated with some of the same meds that are used for those diagnosed as schizophrenic. My layman's opinion is that all of the so-called "mood disorders", and schizophrenia, and many other psychoses, are instabilities of the same system, and, ergo, amenable to treatment by the same meds. The mood disorder meds are used principally to treat mania rather than depression. If the mania that an individual is exhibiting becomes so extraordinary that it can be considered megalomania or profoundly dilusional, it can as easily be described as schizophrenia. I don't believe that there is any reason for distinguishing bipolar disorder from psychosis other than degree.

Dear Jennie,
I would like to say that there is a difference between mania and mania with psychosis. and psychotic depression.
psychosis includes delusions which are false beliefs.
Hallucinations, paranoia and delusions can all fall under psychosis.
I will go do some research so that I am better able to post to you.
bizi

Well then, bizi... by this definition, I have been psychotic, as I have thought people were after me- or aliens, but that one was due to too much pain meds after my wisdom teeth were out back around 1992; oh yeah, and the one I like best is the same week where I was CONVINCED "the dark is coming to get me". The dark on the windows at night when the lights are on inside, that is. I called my mom completely freaked out saying "I know it can't.But it is anyway!"

Anyway, I am feeling better tonight. I had a fine evening. I talked with a friend. My ex came over to watch the kids as is usual. I went to Christopher's around 7:30 or 8:00 and he made gluten-free bread for me in the breadmaker. We hugged and smiled and chatted and watched you-tube for a bit. Then he got out the Whinnie the Pooh book that he has and I read a chapter to him. We have done that maybe three times in the last six months, and he knows I like it so he got the book out of his own accord. I sat reading and he fell asleep hugging me. Sometimes, he and I just laugh and laugh at the things Eeyore and Rabbit et. al. say! I also mentioned having gained 4 lbs in the last six weeks, cuz we were talking about him being three times my weight still- as he was when we were born (3 lbs something and 10 pounds something) - wait he said only twice now- and I said "not likely because I'm 132." he says "132?!" in disbelief and I said "Yeah, I've gained 4 lbs". He says "Are you pregnant?" I said "If I were, I'd be more than six weeks and don't you think I'd've not kept it a secret?" He said "I don't know..." but all in a non-upset way. Ack! Pregnant. He aught to bite his tongue. I have, however, missed two periods, but had weird spotting. Oh yeah- and I said "If only I could blame my craziness on being pregnant. 'Oh! No big deal! I'm not mentally ill- I'm pregnant!'" :p I said it was probably the new meds.

I am tired, however, from yesterday. And even though I slept last night and had crazy dreams, I need more sleep now. (And no doubt more crazy dreams.)

He sounds really sweet...
and I would get a pregnancy test kit.....missed 2 periods...yikes!
bizi
p.s and if you are pregnant...some of the meds are not pregnancy safe...
I know I worry too much....

I might test, Bizi; I thought of it last week or so, but although I get sore breasts every so often, and the period thing and the gaining weight, and smelling weird stuff, I have an IUD and so I highly doubt I could be. The new meds say you can gain weight on them AND I haven't been to judo much, both factors in weight gain. I suppose if I were, though, I'd have to look at my options as both Depakote and Trazadone are not likely good for pregnancy.